Search for Malfoy
by Konflickted
Summary: Lily's been left alone in the world to raise her little boy, and has had to move on from the loss in her life. As she prepares for her son's first year at Hogwarts, she receives a cryptic message that rattles her to the core and brings more questions than answers. When the ministry turns their back and won't help, Lily turns to an unlikely ally...
1. Prologue

**A/N:** I originally had this attached to Slytherin's Littlest Potter. It received such horrendous reviews that I decided to remove it from the original and to do what I always planned to do with it (once I started writing it). Frankly, I write this for myself and not anyone else. If you don't like it, don't read it. I plan to write this between my shifts, so it might be a bit delayed. The following was all posted previously.

**Disclaimer:** Oh, please. I've written some things, made some money, but this would not be something I could stake claim to as creating. But man, if I could!

* * *

**Prologue**

She stood dressed in white, her gown an intricate piece of art. Silks and lace, decorated with what Lily suspected might have been actual pearls hand plucked from their oysters and diamonds twinkling in the pale light of the room. Knowing the Malfoys, dwarfs in diamond mines had picked the diamonds fresh, as well. Her breath caught in her throat as she stared at her reflection in the floor to ceiling mirror in the bridal suite. She was doing it, really doing it. Somewhere below, in the chapel perhaps, everyone was slowly being ushered to their seats. Her father would have arrived by now, her brothers, everyone, and they'd be filing into their seats.

Dressed as a little man, her beloved Theron was probably fiddling with the rings on the pillow. Lily hoped that someone had remembered to tie them tight. It would be a better hesitation to have to fight the pillow for the rings than to try and figure out where the precocious two year old had hidden them. TC had taken to hiding things as of lately. Lily had found more than half a dozen toy cars dropped down the vent in his bedroom, her keys were constantly lost at the bottom of his toy box, and that was just the day to day stuff she noticed.

"I'm doing this. I'm really doing this," Lily whispered to her reflection. Her hand slid to the front of her gown. It was a long time coming, and several postponements, but this time, it was actually happening. Her heart raced. After tonight, there would be no more secrets between her and Scorpius. He could confess his whole job life, and in turn, Lily would tell him about the life that grew beneath her hand.

"Lily?" a voice pulled her out of her thoughts with a knock and an entrance. Lily pulled her hand away from her dress with a blustered feeling and looked at her father in the reflection. She smiled.

"Hi, Dad," she said as she turned to look at him. He beamed at her.

"You look so beautiful, Lily," he confessed. Lily's fingers went to the delicate crown of curls, pinned beneath her veil. She touched one of the many tiny flowers woven in to the auburn tresses.

"Thank you," Lily said. She glanced at the clock, swallowing back a sigh.

"He'll be here soon," Harry said with a nod and a grin. "James swore he'd get them both back in time. Your brother's never let you down before now; he's not going to start now."

"I know," Lily said with a smile and a nod as another knock drew here attention from her father dressed to the nines. Nina entered the room, followed by Shale, Kate, and Albus. Lily laughed.

"Any more of us in here, and we might as well just invite Scorpius up to the bridal suite to have the ceremony," Harry teased. "The rest of the wedding party be damned."

"Is he here?" Lily asked unable to hide her excitement as Damon entered.

"Oh, no, not yet," Damon said. "I left a note at the apartment, Lils. I'm sure they probably arrived right after I left and are on their way now. You know they wouldn't let you down."

"I swear, if there had been anyone else to send," Harry apologized to his only daughter.

"Daddy, it's okay," Lily promised with a nod and a forced smile. "I know this is the way it's supposed to be."

"Just think," Nina laughed. "After tonight, there will be no coded messages and meaningful looks that you have to ignore. You'll be one of us."

"And that, almost more than actually making it official, is what makes this all worth it," Lily laughed as she smoothed her hands down the front of her dress. She peered out the window to the door of the chapel. It was flung open to let the cool breeze of spring flow through. It looked like a full house, packed to the rafters, though Lily couldn't be sure from where she stood.

"Oh, come on," Kate giggled. "As much as you love Scorpius?"

"Oh, okay, I admit it," Lily confessed with a grin. "I'm looking forward to being his wife."

"It's about time you said yes to him," Damon said.

"Yes, yes it is," Lily said quietly as she looked away from the group that had congregated in her room. She looked at herself critically in the mirror. "Is Theron behaving himself?"

"Oh, yes," Harry snickered. "Draco's having a ton of fun with that boy. Poor Narcissa is going out of her mind trying to get Draco to act his age. Can't blame him. TC's a great kid."

"Yes, yes he is," Lily beamed at her reflection. The boy looked more like Scorpius than he looked like her, his eyes had turned that same steely gray that Lily had grown to love. He had the same shaped face, similar colored hair. His expressions were similar, but what really hammered it home for Lily was Theron's smirk. Even at two years old, he had mastered Malfoy's smirk.

"He'll be here soon," Harry promised, resting his hand on her shoulder lightly. "Let me get these people back to their seats and check on Theron, then I will be back."

"I'm not going anywhere," Lily said closing her eyes. Her heart raced as she pictured him two nights ago, standing at the foot of her bed, packing.

"_I'll be back," Scorpius promised. "I promise, Lily."_

"_I know," she had said as she leaned back against the pillows._

"_If anyone else could go, if anyone else could finish this," Scorpius stopped and dropped his bag, scooping Lily up in his arms, bed clothes and all. Pain was etched in his face. "It hurts me to leave you, ever."_

"_You'll be back," Lily said with a slight smile. He kissed her deeply. "You always come back."_

"_I love you," he whispered, sealing that promise with one last kiss. "I always love you."_

"_And I love you," she breathed as he placed her back in bed. "Now hurry up and come back to me, so we can do this up right. I have something I want to tell you, but not until our wedding night."_

"_Oh, Lily," he chuckled shaking his head as he retrieved his discarded bag. "You are the cruelest."_

"_Just hurry home, Mr. Malfoy," she said coyly._

"Are you okay?" Damon asked touching Lily's arm. Her eyes snapped open and she looked at him, confused.

"Didn't you go back down to wait with the others?" Lily asked. He smiled and shook his head.

"Not yet," he said. He held out a box to her. "Scorpius wanted me to give this to you just before the ceremony, since it's bad luck to see the bride before the wedding."

Lily took the box and opened it. Inside was her locket. She smiled slightly and turned it to Damon to look. He grinned and stepped forward, removing the delicate chain and pendent, looping it over her neck and latching it at the back. It fell into place and Lily sighed.

"Blot your eyes, girl," Damon said handing her his handkerchief. "Don't want to smudge your make up."

"Thanks, Damon," she said as she dabbed at her eyes. "Who knows why these things are so emotional."

"It's a wedding, Lily," Damon reminded her needlessly. "Why else?"

"I know," Lily said sighing as she looked back at her reflection.

"Are you scared?" he asked her and Lily shook her head slightly, the curls around her head bouncing in motion.

"Just ready," she said with a deep, content sigh. "I love him so much, sometimes it hurts."

"A good hurt, though?" Damon asked and Lily nodded.

"With him, love always hurts a good hurt," she said. Her hands slid to her stomach again, almost protective of the life force beneath. "Always."

Something in her ached something fierce though she couldn't put her finger on it. Her heart raced under her breast and she felt light headed. She kept her eyes closed and focused on breathing. She wouldn't allow a panic attack ruin this day for her. She and Scorpius deserved a perfect day.

"Are you okay?" Damon asked again.

"I don't feel very good," Lily confessed. "Could you get me something to drink?"

"Sure, yeah. No problem, Lily," Damon said as he headed over to the wet bar. He fixed Lily a drink and turned back to her. "You look really pale. Maybe you should sit down."

"Something's wrong," Lily murmured as something felt as if it slashed from within. She groaned as a loud crack split the air in the room. James fell forward, covered in blood. Damon rushed forward as Lily stood there in shock. He dropped to his knees, holding the man up as blood poured from his face.

"James?" Lily breathed as Damon held him. James pushed away from Damon, stumbling to his knees as he held out two pieces of wood, covered in blood.

"I'm sorry Lily," he gasped sending blood spraying down the front of his clothes. "I failed."

"Lily, you're bleeding," Damon nearly screamed. Lily's hand went to the front of her dress , pressing the fabric against her. She pulled her hand away to see the blood that was blossoming on her dress.

"The baby," Lily said flatly. She looked at her brother, dying at her feet and she fell to her knees, stripping his shirt from his skin. She sobbed. "Damon, get help."

Damon was already scrambling to his feet as Lily pulled James into her lap. James' head flopped back and he looked at her as if he didn't even see her. Blood trickled out of his mouth and Lily pressed her hand against the gaping hole in his chest.

"I'm sorry," he whispered over and over as a tear escaped his eye, trailing down his cheek and disappearing from sight. "I'm sorry I broke my promise."

"Shut up, James," Lily sobbed as she held him closer.

"Scorpius… there were too many of them…" James gasped as Lily clamped her hand harder on the bleeding wound. "His wand…"

Lily knocked the broken stick from his hand and shook her head. She brushed his hair out of his eyes and shook her head again. She could hear the people nearing, the screaming and the shouting. Help would be there soon.

"Don't you dare leave your children, James," Lily whispered as her father breached the door first. "He's dead."

Lily remained on her knees, leaning back on her heals in shock while the flourish of activity to take James to St. Mungo's spun around her. She didn't register the touches or movement, just cradled her brother in her lap brushing his too long hair out of his blank and staring eyes. After they removed James from the scene, she still remained on the floor. She didn't say anything, just stared down at the crimson stain that covered her dress and the floor before her.

"Lily, you have to get up," a voice called to her as if from a far off place trying to bring her back. It made her think of times that she'd been unwell and just unwilling to wake. Her mouth turned down and she continued to stare. A pair of hands grabbed her shoulders and pulled her up from the ground.

"Let's just apparate her back to the house," another said through stressed voice. Lily could see them, Damon and Marshall, talking about her as if she wasn't even there. It wasn't that far off. She didn't feel like she was there.

Damon slid his arm around her, supporting her, and Marshall caught her other side. Together the three of them aparated back to Lily's apartment; the same one that was down the hall from Scorpius and Damon's apartment. Lily didn't move. She just stood there. Damon looked to Marshall bewildered. Lily wasn't like this, ever. Even when she was going through the worst, when she thought that Scorpius had left her pregnant and alone, she'd never become unresponsive. Marshall sighed.

"Oh, Lily," Marshall said as he took her by the hand and led her to the bedroom. Damon followed, stopping just inside the doorway of the room.

"What are you doing?" Damon asked as Marshall began to tug at the zipper of her dress.

"I can't very well leave her in a bloodied wedding dress. I'm going to clean her up," Marshall said quietly. "If you'd rather us meet you at the hospital when we're done."

"I'm not leaving you alone with her," Damon said frowning. "She's my best mate's girl."

"I'm a professional, for Merlin's sake," Marshall retorted hotly. "I've bathed hundreds of people in my time as a Healer. It's part of my job."

"Yeah, but I'd dare say you've never had a history with one, not like you do with Lily," Damon said. Marshall frowned.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Marshall asked. He shook his head and waved his hand in the air. "Never mind, it doesn't matter right now. What matters right now is getting Lily cleaned up and getting her to her family's side."

"Fine, what do you need me to do?" Damon asked after a second. Marshall glanced at the bathroom and Damon immediately went to work, flicking on all the taps and getting the shower going.

"Shit, Lily," Marshall whispered quietly. Damon turned to see her standing before them, wearing a strapless bra and a pair of panties. Both were covered in blood. Marshall turned to Damon. "It's not all James' blood."

"What do you mean, is she hurt?" Damon asked, ignoring the near nakedness of his best friend's fiancé.

"I think… no… I know she's pregnant," Marshall said. "And I think she might be losing it."

"Oh, oh God," Damon said quietly. Marshall grabbed Lily's shoulders and shook her hard.

"Lily, you have to snap out of this," Marshall yelled. Damon took a step back in shock. He'd never heard Marshall yell, and certainly not at Lily. "Lily, damn it. Are you pregnant?"

"Yes," she whispered so faintly that Damon more saw her mouth move than hear the actual words. Her hands went from her side to cradle her stomach. "But not… not anymore…" A giant tear welled up in Lily's eye and rolled solitarily down her cheek. Her hands fell away and she turned her head.

"You need to take a shower so we can go to the hospital, to see your brother and to check on your baby," Marshall said sternly. Lily glanced from Marshall to Damon.

"Where's Scorpius? Is he already there?" Lily asked quietly.

"We…" Damon looked to Marshall for guidance.

"Get cleaned up, Lily, and we'll find out together," Marshall said. She looked lost.

"Where's Theron?" Lily asked frowning.

"Draco has him," Marshall piped up. Lily nodded once and seemed satisfied with that. Still she stood there, unmoving. Marshall took a deep breath and glanced at Damon before circling his arms around Lily. In one swift motion, he unclasped her bra and removed her final shred of clothing. Without looking at her body, he put his hands on her upper arms and propelled her to the shower.

"How do you do it?" Damon asked, his eyes still wide with shock.

"Do what?"

"You know what. Everyone, except Lily of course, knows that you're utterly in love with her. You just undressed her like she was nothing to you," Damon said shaking his head. Marshall and Damon headed out of the bathroom, through the bedroom, and back to the living room.

"It's my job," Marshall said with a shrug.

"But you do love her," Damon said questioning.

"I like her a lot," Marshall admitted. "Enough that I offered her marriage when she was pregnant with Theron."

"But do you love her?" Damon pressed. Marshall threw his hands up.

"Why does it matter to you?" Marshall asked angrily.

"It doesn't," Damon said as he forced his hand through his hair. "I just wanted to know."

"Doesn't matter," Marshall said. "She's Scorpius'. Nothing is going to change that. Not even death."

"We don't know that he's dead," Damon said hotly. He clenched his jaw and fists. "We don't know anything. We won't until we get to the hospital to check on James."

"I hate to be the one to break it to you, but James had more blood on him than one whole body carries. Assuming it's not all his, it's someone's blood, and it was just the two of them out in the field," Marshall said quietly.

"You don't know what you're-"

"I don't feel very good," Lily said quietly as she walked into the room, interrupting the heated argument between Marshall and Damon. Her hair was wet from the shower, make up gone. She stood wearing a long tee shirt that ended between her hips and knees. She looked surprised to see them standing there in her living room. "Marshall? Damon? Why are you in my living room?"

"We brought you home to clean up," Damon said frowning. "Don't you remember? You were in your wedding dress and James collapsed and bled all over it."

"Oh my, is he okay?" Lily asked as her eyes widened in panic. Damon shot a look to Marshall.

"Lily, honey, are you okay?" Marshall asked as Lily winced and her hand went to her stomach.

"I don't… I don't know," she said hesitantly. Damon and Marshall saw the rivulets of blood gushing down her legs and pooling at her feet. She looked down before she doubled over in pain and cried out. Marshall ran to her side while Damon went to alert St. Mungo's to send help. Whatever was happening to Lily was more than a simple miscarriage.

"Lily?" Marshall asked as he lowered her to the ground.

"It's the baby," Lily gasped in pain. She grabbed her shoulder, gripping it. "Something's wrong with the baby."

"Do you know how far along you are?" Marshall asked. "Does your shoulder hurt too?"

"Helps on the way," Damon said as he brought a towel. He kneeled beside them and handed it to Marshall.

"I think she's bleeding out," Marshall said.

"No shit, there's blood everywhere," Damon said. Marshall shook his head.

"No, this… this is nothing compared to what I suspect is going on inside. Her shoulder hurts, which points to blood pooling in her abdomen and pushing on the diaphragm. She could die," Marshall whispered to Damon. Damon when sheet-white.

"Merlin," he whispered.

"Hey, Lily? Lily? How far along are you?" Marshall asked slapping her cheek firmly.

"I don't know," Lily gasped as she tried to double over from the pain.

"Guess," Marshall implored.

"Seven… eight weeks," Lily said. "I'd guess. But last time I thought I was only four or five weeks, and I was closer to eleven."

"Honey," Marshall said really quiet while he checked her pulse. "You're in serious shape."

"It's okay," Lily choked out. "It's all going to be okay."

Lily was taken to surgery right away. There was no stopping to chat or to call her dad in on the decision. No time at all for anything. The healers took her off to carve her up and try their best to save her life. Marshall and Damon sought out Harry, to see how things were going with James. Albus looked up first and he looked angry.

"What the hell took you guys so long? Where's my sister?" Albus demanded. Damon took a step back, but Marshall was familiar with the anger.

"Albus, where's your father?" Damon asked as Marshall stood strong to Albus' stare down. Albus whipped his head to the glass door beside him. Damon pushed forward, Albus stepping in front of the door.

"Where's my sister?" Albus demanded.

"She's in surgery," Marshall said flatly. He was used to delivering these bits of news to waiting family, having switched to the emergency medical ward from the critical curse ward. Albus looked as if Marshall had gut-punched the wind out of him.

"Surgery?" Albus managed. He looked to Damon who nodded once. Albus looked down at the blood on Damon's knees. "Her blood?"

"Yeah," Damon said after looking down. He looked as if he had waded in it knee high. Funny, until that moment he didn't feel the sticky way his once butter colored dress pants adhered to his legs.

"Merlin," Albus said collapsing back into the stiff back chair, covering his eyes with both of his hands. It was in that moment that Harry stepped out of the room, leaving behind his son.

"Damon?" Harry said frowning. He glanced to Albus crying into his hands, and then to Marshall. "Marshall, where's my daughter?"

"Harry, there was a problem," Marshall said leading him a few feet from the door. He quickly skirted over the finer details and left it all clinical. Lily was up in surgery, bleeding out from a ruptured tube, and if they could save her, they would.

Harry stood there in shock, unable to move or even breathe for a moment. It was that sock to the gut feeling all over again, the hopelessness etched into his rapidly aging face. He closed his eyes for a moment, unable to formulate his thoughts into spoken word.

"My son is dead, and my daughter is dying," Harry breathed, his eyes still closed to the room. He shook his head, over and over, as if to try and unsuccessfully shake the thought from his mind. He could picture that beautiful baby that Ginny had delivered all those years ago, the little girl that took her first tentative steps toward James to steal a cookie that the preschooler had been eating.

The memoires flooded over him a tidal surge of emotion. He fell to his knees, hands covering his eyes. It was one thing to bury his wife, but the very thought of burying one of his child was more than he could take. He had had visited these fears when Lily had almost drown when she was thirteen, and she'd pulled through. But the old fears haunted him, still, and now in his mind's eye, there were two caskets, James still as sleep in one, and Lily in the other.

It was too much for one father to bear. His chest tightened, cracking under the immense pressure of it. He'd lost so many and managed to pull through, but this time he couldn't. He couldn't do it. Hand to chest, eyes clenched as tight as his chest felt, Harry slumped forward.

Dead.

Be it heart attack or broken heart, Harry Potter was dead.


	2. Chapter One

**A/N:** I don't think I'm going to do any more author's notes from here on out.

**Disclaimer:** Much, written in my own hand with my own characters, but this would not be it. Plot is mine, the world is not.

* * *

**Chapter One**

"Do you think I'll get my letter soon?" Theron's voice echoed in the apartment. Lily looked up from the box she was unpacking.

"Usually they come during the summer," she explained as she flicked her wand, sending dishes zooming through the air and neatly stacking themselves in the cupboard. Theron watched in awe, and a twinge of guilt stabbed her. She debated just unpacking them herself but decided that she just didn't have it in her to do so tonight.

"I hope it comes soon," Theron explained as he opened up another box. He wrinkled his nose and pushed the box toward his mother. "Books."

"You can leave them," Lily nodded at another stack of boxes. "Why not take your boxes into your room and start unpacking them."

"Did we really live her once?" he asked as he lifted one of the smaller boxes. He tried to peek above the too large box.

"Once, a long time ago, when you were a baby," Lily explained as she sent the books flying one by one into the book shelf. She didn't look at her son, uncertain if she'd be able to hide the emotion on her face. She worked quickly, sending the contents of the boxes here and there until the boxes were all empty and breaking down.

"It'll be nice when I don't have to walk these down to the refuse bins," Theron whispered to his mother as the two struggled to carry them onto the lift to take them down. Lily couldn't agree more, but for the sake of looking normal she and Theron had to carry them down to the basement.

"Need some help?" a voice asked following down the hallway. Lily looked up and nearly dropped the boxes. Strutting toward her, confident and cocksure was Damon West. She tried to smile at him, but she feared it came off more of a grimace.

"Mum?" Theron asked looking to his mother for guidance.

"It's okay, Theron," Lily promised as she handed off half the stack he was struggling with to Damon. "This is our neighbor, Mr. West."

"Hello, Mr. West," Theron said with a slight frown on his face. Damon moved to take some boxes from him but Theron held tight and wouldn't relinquish them.

"You know, Lily," Damon said with a smirk. "No one's home during the day here, typically. You could just use magic."

"I know," Lily retorted. She whipped out her wand and with a pop, the boxes were gone.

"Mum," Theron groaned.

"It's quicker this way," Lily explained as she looked at Damon.

"Want to go for tea?" he asked, staring at the boy who stood beside her.

"How 'bout it, TC?" Lily looked to her son. He looked between his mother and Damon and frowned even more.

"C'mon sport," Damon said ruffling his hair. Theron frowned even more, deep contempt on his face.

"Please?" Lily asked of her son and he nodded once. Damon grinned.

"Fantastic," he said offering his arm to Lily and Theron. "Ever been to the Leaky Cauldron?"

"No," Theron said glancing at his mother and following her lead. Damon gripped his arm.

"You're in for a treat then," Damon said as the three aparated. Damon held tight at Theron pitched forward, holding him until he was able to steady. The boy pulled away from him and glared at him. If Damon noticed, he didn't say anything. The three of them headed into the pub.

"It's just like I remember it," Lily's breathless awe causing Theron to glance at her.

"Mum, you've been here before?" he asked. There was a hint of contempt and disbelief in his voice. Lily nodded.

"Many times," she replied but she didn't elaborate. An ancient old man looked up and grinned his toothless grin from behind the bar while rags hovered in mid air waiting for a dirty glass or plate to clean.

"Merlin! Is that little Lily Potter I see? All grown up," the man called out, his voice surprisingly strong despite his advanced age.

"Tom," she offered him a smile.

"I've not seen you in years, not since..." the man's eyes misted up as he patted Lily's arm. "Ah, and Damon, always a pleasure but you, my friend, I've seen plenty to not need to greet you with more than a hello."

"Always good, Tom," Damon nodded. The man directed his attention to the boy standing next to Lily, tall and proud.

"And my, this must be... but younger, no?" Tom's frown puckered his face as he tried to place the boy.

"My son, Theron," Lily answered proudly. "He's eleven."

"Has it been so many years already?" Tom murmured as he adjusted his glasses and looked at the boy critically. "But of course, a spitting image of his father."

"My father?" Theron's eyes widened and he looked at the man greedily.

"A table," Lily interrupted loudly, taking her arm from Damon's and directing her son towards one of the clean but dingy booths. Lily pushed the boy into the booth first, sliding in next to him. Damon sat across from them.

"Mum, did that man know my father?" Theron asked excitedly.

"Theron, not right now," Lily said through a false smile as she snapped her fingers once and menus appeared before them.

"My treat," Damon piped up. "You can order whatever you want, Theron. Don't hold back."

"You'll regret that," Lily chuckled as she perused the menu.

"Want to see something cool," Damon asked lowering his voice. "Tom hates when I do this but... watch."

"What?" Theron asked watching the older man wink at him. Damon pulled his wand out from somewhere out of sight and glanced around before tapping the menu three times. If he said anything, Theron didn't see him. With a crack, plates danced through the air and dipping and diving before them on the table, never settling for more than a moment.

"Merlin's short, Damon!" Tom called from the other side of the pub. Damon laughed and pushed one of the plates toward Lily. It landed with a faint noise, stoneware on polished wood.

"Your favorite, if I remember correctly," Damon said. Lily looked up from the plate of ham and mashed potatoes in surprise.

"I can't believe you remember," her voice mirrored the surprise that widened her eyes.

"I remember everything," he shrugged and turned to Theron. "You, young man, I don't know what your favorite is anymore. When you were little, it was fish and chips." Theron grinned.

"Still is," he said as he pulled the giant plate toward him. "With vinegar and salt, when mum lets me put it on myself."

"You always put too much," Lily responded as she watched Damon pull a final plate from the dancing plates around them, sending the disregarded ones back to the kitchen where they had come.

"So, you've moved back home, have you?" Damon asked cautiously as he tucked into his plate. He grinned when he saw Theron take advantage of the lack of focus on Lily's part to drown his fish and chips in the tangy liquids set on the wall side of the table.

"Theron's going off to Hogwarts in the fall," Lily replied as if that was the most common answer to give. Damon laughed and looked at the boy.

"You must be besides yourself excited about that," Damon said. The boy nodded, cheeks puffed out from all the fried fish he'd stuffed in there. The boy chewed hurriedly and swallowed, nearly choking.

"Boy am I!" his excitement was contagious. "Did you know my mom went there? Same with my dad?"

"I did," Damon said. "I knew your-"

"I hope I'm in Slytherin," Theron rambled, not even pausing to let Damon finish his statement. "I mean, I suppose any house would do, just to get to do magic. Mum says I have to wait until I get my official letter before she'll take me to get a wand, which I think is silly but mum's rules are mum's rules."

"You have to make sure that you get in," Lily reminded her tow headed son. He smirked.

"Mum, I'm a Malfoy," Theron retorted as if that summed it up.

The rest of the meal went without much conversation. Damon settled up with Tom, dropping coins on the bar and offering his arm to Lily. Theron scrambled out of the booth behind her, and the three stood in the pub expectantly. Lily looked at her son and smiled.

"How about we go to Uncle George's shop?" Lily suggested almost hesitantly. Theron looked at her almost warily.

"Are you sure?" he asked. Lily shrugged.

"If you don't want to go..." Lily trailed off as her son's face blossomed into the biggest grin.

"Honestly!" he cheered looking right at Damon. "Mum's uncle runs a joke shop. I've never been, but my cousins all have been. Great Grandma Molly says that its loads of fun."

"Mind if I tag along, sport?" Damon asked Theron. Theron shrugged noncommittally but took his mother's hand.

"Are we aparating?" Theron asked.

"Don't have to," Lily said as the three of them exited the back room of the pub. She pulled out her wand and tapped on the brick like she had as a child and the wall seemed to melt away, opening up to Diagon Ally. The main throughway spilled out before them, shops flanking them on either side. Many had come and gone, but a fair few had remained. Half way down, George and the late Fred's store stood as a beacon of never changing hope.

"Is that it?" Theron whispered in awe. Lily nudged him forward.

"Go on ahead," she encouraged. She pulled a few coins out of her pocket. "Try not to break the bank."

"Can we see the goblins afterwards?" Theron asked with eyes the size of saucers. Lily laughed.

"We'll see," Lily promised. "Go on ahead, and Mr. West and I will catch up." Theron hesitated, looking at Damon suspiciously.

"I'll keep an eye on her until you return," Damon promised solemnly, though there was a twinkle of mischief in his eyes.

"Okay," Theron agreed after a long pause. He took off down the street, nearly mowing down an old woman with a cane. Lily and Damon continued on their leisurely pace down Diagon Ally.

"Lily, Merlin, it's good to see you again," Damon said as the two took a seat on a nearby bench not far from the store.

"You, too, Damon," Lily replied honestly.

"He looks so much... so much like..." Damon stumbled over the words.

"Like Scorpius, I know," Lily's words were only slightly edged with sorrow. It had been nine years she'd taken to deal with the death of her brother and father, and the disappearance of her fiancée.

"It's like looking back in time at him," Damon's voice was quiet. "He even has Scorpius' smirk."

"He is definitely his father's son. Down to the over protectiveness," Lily sighed.

"Did you find what you were looking for?" Damon asked and his voice took on an almost bitter edge.

"I left because it was the right thing to do, not because I was looking for anything in particular. It was too hard to be here," Lily explained. "Think how much it hurts to see him, to see my son, and then think on how much he reminds you of Scorpius. You've been around us barely a few hours. Day in and day out, seeing that boy, his smirk and expressions, hearing his words, and you don't think it was the best thing I could have done?"

"No, Lily, I don't," Damon replied. "I think it was selfish and cowardly." His tone was gentle, but the words cut her to the quick.

"Cowardly? Because of me, Maggie lost her husband," Lily replied sharply. "I made a promise to her that she'd not see hide or hair of me. She only just moved away so I could return."

"Maggie never blamed you," Damon challenged. Lily laughed bitterly.

"No, not in front of people," Lily's words were laced with double meaning and thickened with emotion. She wiped the back of her hand across her eyes. "I said I wasn't going to do this anymore."

"Maggie was upset those first few months, no doubt, but it wasn't your fault that James died," Damon placed his hand on Lily's shoulder, keeping her from turning away from him. "James died doing his job."

"If he hadn't have been rushing, trying to get Scorpius back to me on time," Lily took a deep breath. "Look, I really don't want to talk about this. I've had to come to terms with my dad and brother dying within hours of each other and losing the baby, and constantly hoping in vain that Scorpius is alive somewhere."

"Lily," Damon warned.

"No, Damon, I know. If he was alive, he'd have found a way back to me," Lily interjected. "I'm not stupid or naive. I don't allow myself to hope, often. But it used to sneak up on me, and in my mind, I have to believe that he's dead."

"Lils," Damon breathed.

"Please, Damon, don't call me that," Lily's pained face stopped him from reaching for her, his hand closing on empty air and falling against the back of the bench. "Whatever you do, Damon, please don't call me that."

"Okay," Damon said after a few moments of silence between them. "Has Theron seen Draco lately?"

"Draco's been a bit of a problem, lately," Lily replied with a sigh.

"A problem?"

"Yes, well, he and Narcissa have been begging me to allow him to live at Malfoy Manor with them," Lily shrugged slightly as she shivered despite the early coming summer air.

"You don't want him to go?"

"It's not that," Lily took a deep breath. "He won't go, even if I ask him to go. He seems that he has to be the man of the house and protect me at all cost. Par for the course, they both understand. It's just hard when every moment he's not in lessons, he wants to be with me."

"Do you... I mean, perhaps I can take him for a day. Nine years is a long time to not get a break," Damon suggested. Lily laughed.

"He used to not be this bad," Lily explained. "I think he feels like he has to be for me the moon and the stars."

"He's a pretty special kid," Damon agreed. Lily looked to the store and nodded.

"This is the longest that he's willingly been away from me," Lily pointed out.

"Maybe being here, back in London, will help," Damon suggested. "And I'm still just down the hall in our old apartment. As much as you want to protect the world from him, the world needs Theron."

"That's what I'm afraid of," Lily murmured to herself as Damon stood and offered his hand to help her rise. Lily hesitated before she placed her hand in his. He squeezed it gently as she rose to her feet.

"You know, I've missed having you around," Damon said as they closed the distance between the bench and the door.

"Well, I'm back," Lily grinned up at him. "A little older, a little wiser, and a little less naive."

"Older and wiser, yes, but I think you still have that sweet naivety to you," Damon covered her hand with his own. "And I wouldn't change a thing."


	3. Chapter Two

**Disclaimer:** Created the plot and the unique characters. That is all.

* * *

**Chapter Two**

Theron frowned as his mother neatly folded his clothes and sent them packing into the suitcase open on the bed. He crossed his arms over his chest and tried to stare her down. If Lily noticed, she didn't indicate it.

"Mum, why didn't you use magic more when I was younger?" Theron asked. Lily hesitated, holding her wand at the levitating pair of jeans.

"Well, for one, we lived in a fairly muggle dense area," Lily responded. "I mean, I used it from time to time, but when you were littler, it was just easier to pretend that I was just a muggle like everyone else."

"It's because of dad, huh?" Theron asked cautiously. "Because of what happened to dad."

"Theron, I don't really want to talk about this right now," Lily continued packing his suitcase. "Grandpa Draco will be here soon to pick you up, and you've not even picked out any toys that you want to bring."

"What's this, Mum?" Theron asked as he reached behind the tall cabinet. Lily looked up to see a well worn bear dangling by a paw.

"Oh, wow," Lily gasped as she stepped forward, taking the dust covered bear. "It's Mr. Bear."

"Mr. Bear?" Theron cocked his eyebrow up.

"It was your father's when he was a child, and when he was setting this room up for you, he brought it here," Lily fluffed the dust off the bear and sneezed. Theron and she laughed.

"For me?"

"For you, TC," Lily grinned. "You had the worst habit of hiding things, which is probably why I didn't find it when I was packing up."

"Can I keep it?" Theron hesitated. She nodded at her son and held out the bear as the bell rang.

"We really need to think about getting a fireplace and hooking to the Floo Network," Lily mumbled to herself as she headed to the door. She peeped out the hole and her heart stuttered for a second. It was eerie how much Draco looked like an older version of Scorpius.

"Draco," Lily threw the door open and grinned.

"Lily," he kissed her cheek lightly. "Glad to have you back. Is he ready?"

"Nearly so," Lily closed the door and offered the man a cup of tea. The two sat at the table, and Lily couldn't help but be reminiscent of days gone by a lifetime ago. He stirred the tea and looked over the cup at her.

"You look good," he told her. Lily felt the flush of her cheeks but offered him a smile.

"Thank you, so do you," she replied. He laughed.

"You flatter an old man," he teased. "Are you seeing anyone?"

"Draco, how improper! I'm young enough to be your daughter," Lily grinned and the man chuckled. She shook her head. "I'm not. Theron keeps me very busy, and he's a bit territorial."

"Still, he'll be heading off to Hogwarts and you'll be heading off to your new job," Draco suggested. "Scorpius would want you happy."

"Scorpius would want to be the only one who could make me happy," Lily pointed out. Draco nodded.

"Still," Draco shrugged slightly.

"I'll tell you what," Lily promised. "At some point, I'll date. When I'm ready. I know Scorpius is gone forever. I don't mourn him like I used to. I don't hold on to false hope anymore. I'm just not in a rush to fill my life with more people at the moment."

"All right, I know when I'm pushing you too hard," Draco said with a sigh as Theron carried the suitcase into the room.

"Grandpa," Theron grinned. "Do you think Gram will let me fish in the pond? I brought my pole."

"I'm sure she won't mind," Draco replied as he checked a regal looking pocket watch."As long as you catch and release. I don't think Gram is going to want a fish and frogs in the manor."

"Are you sure you're okay with me going, Mum?" Theron wrapped his arms around his mother.

"Theron, I'll be fine. Plus this will be good practice for when you go off to Hogwarts in the fall," Lily squeezed her son.

"Will you write me? What if you need something?" Theron asked tilting his head up to look at the mother he was only a head shorter than.

"Of course I'll write you, and I'm going to be very busy at work," Lily explained. "I'll be there for Sunday supper and if I need anything-"

"I'll make sure your mother has it," Draco cut in on the conversation. "She's the closest thing to a daughter that I have."

"I love you, mum," Theron whispered as he gave her one last tight squeeze and released her. Theron gripped the suitcase in one hand and Draco's arm with the other. Lily waited until they were gone before heading to the master suite. Tub running, she stripped down naked and slipped into wade pool sized tub. She made herself a goatee out of the scented bubbles and relaxed back against the side after dunking her head completely under the water.

With a child and full time job, she barely had time for a shower. She would do well to remember that Theron was only going for a short visit, and not to grow used to the long baths. She sighed and closed her eyes for a few more minutes, enjoying the momentary peace.

Startling her, the door bell chimed through the house. Lily jumped out of the tub, and jerked the closest robe on before heading to the door. She cinched the belt as she opened the door to Damon standing there. She grinned at him, not even surprised to see him.

"What can I do for you, Damon?" She asked him. Damon swallowed, letting his eyes slide down her form and back to her face. His face brightened slightly.

"I, uh... did I interrupt you?" Damon asked as he forced his hand through his short brown hair. Lily frowned.

"No?" she looked at her robe and didn't think too much of her attire. With Lily still wet, it hugged tight against her like a second skin. She briefly wondered if it bothered him. "You want to come in?"

"Yeah, sure," he said and he wouldn't meet her eyes. Lily held the door open as he swept in to the living room. "Hey, where's the piano?"

"I had it removed," Lily replied simply as she took a seat on the couch. Damon took a seat a little further away in one of the chairs.

"Oh."

"Did you need something, or is this a social call?"

"I wanted to invite you and Theron over for dinner tonight," Damon said as he fought to keep his eyes on her face. She smiled regretfully.

"Draco was here a little while ago to take Theron back to Malfoy Manor for a few days while I get settled into my new job," she explained.

"Oh."

"I can still come, though, if you don't mind it just being me," Lily taunted. Damon's eyes had wandered to the plunging collar of the robe and he'd lost his train of thought. Lily snapped her fingers and his eyes met hers, cheeks flaming in embarrassment.

"I wasn't looking," he promised weakly. Lily laughed.

"So, want to reschedule it for another night, or am I enough dinner company?" Lily asked.

"Oh, you're enough," Damon breathed. He jerked upright as if snapping out of some trance and frowned slightly. He forced his hand through his hair again. "Though, you might want to put something else on. I mean, dining at Casa de West is casual dining, but solo robe is just a little too undressed." She laughed.

"I'll need a few minutes," Lily stood and headed toward the bedroom. She pushed it closed behind her, but it didn't engage. She could hear Damon out in the living room as she pulled off the robe and hung it back where she'd found it. She opted for a pair of jeans and a soft tee shirt. She used her wand to dry her hair, pulling it up into a simple pony tail before rejoining Damon in the living room.

"Hope you like chicken," Damon said as they entered the apartment that once upon a time had been his and Scorpius' apartment. She hesitated just inside the door before following all the way into the apartment.

"Chicken's good," Lily promised as she followed him into the kitchen, a mirror image of her own. "Need any help? Oh my gosh, that smells amazing."

"I'm glad you approve, and just relax and enjoy yourself," Damon chuckled as he stirred the potatoes. He watched Lily lean against the counter. He crossed close to her, leaning in, and reached above her head to the spice rack. "Just need this to finish it up."

"Ah," Lily murmured.

The two of them sat down at the table, across from one another. Damon had confessed that he didn't have any candles, but that maybe next time they dined together he would get some candles. The conversation flowed easily between them over dinner. It had been a long time since Lily just sat and talked over a good meal.

"This is the best meal I've eaten in a long time," Lily admitted as she and Damon headed to the living room for tea and desert. She sipped her too hot tea, burning the tip of her tongue.

"Oh, sorry I should have warned you," Damon apologized as he ran back to the kitchen to get her something cool to drink.

"Hot tea, who would have thought?" Lily laughed as she welcomed the cool water. "Does it look burned?" With her tongue out, it came out a bit muddled. Damon leaned forward from his place next to her on the couch.

"I looks fine," he said and he leaned back a bit to get out of her personal space. She smiled and reached for her tea again.

"I'll let it cool before I drink it again," she promised and instead dipped a piece of biscotti into the warm brew. The two of them let the lull in conversation ease over them. They sat shoulder to shoulder on the couch, lost in their own thoughts.

"This is nice," Damon said after a while.

"I could get used to this," Lily said quietly. She laughed. "You're spoiling me, Damon."

"You deserve some spoiling," Damon nudged her shoulder with his.

"I can't believe you've not been scooped up," Lily stretched. "It's getting late. Walk me home?"

"My pleasure," he murmured as he stood and offered her his arm. Lily rose from the couch.

"Do you want me to help clean up?" she asked but he took her hand and tucked it in his arm.

"The dishes can wait tonight," his voice was quiet, deep. It curled around her warm like another body in the room. Side by side, they walked out of the apartment and down the hall to Lily's apartment, pausing for her to fish the key out of her pocket and unlocking it.

"Damon, I had a wonderful time," Lily declared honestly. "I hope we can do this again."

"I had a good time, too," Damon agreed. They stood face to face, with less than a foot of space between them. Neither made a move.

"Well, um, thanks," Lily said and she leaned forward and hugged him lightly, kissing him on the cheek. It was a light, chaste kiss but for some reason Lily felt her heart start racing.

"Sleep well," Damon told her as Lily slipped in the open door.

"You too, Damon," Lily challenged playfully. "Or else."

"I think I might like to find out what 'else' entails, Miss Potter," Damon teased and he kissed her firmly on the mouth before turning and walking away.


	4. Chapter Three

**Disclaimer:** Created the plot and the unique characters. That is all.

* * *

**Chapter Three**

Lily made a face as she entered the stall. She dreaded putting her new leather boots into the toilet and flushing herself into the ministry. She adjusted her briefcase and took a deep breath, stepping into the bowl. Despite the blue water in the bowl, her feet remained dry. She reached up and pulled the chain handle, flushing herself quite properly down the loo.

Being flushed felt very much like aparating, but with the sensation of diving feet first into a deep, summer's pool. The wet warm enveloped her, a blanket that squeezed a bit too tight before the sensation completely released her and Lily found her footing on the stone steps inside the grate of the loo-floo. Not the worst way to travel from one place to the next, but Lily wondered if she could talk the minister into signing a special permission for her house to be hooked up to the floo network that specifically would allow her access to the ministry. Granted, she'd need to commission a fire grate to be installed into the apartment, but nothing was impossible with magic.

Wizards and witches hurried past her, cloaks flapping behind them as they went this way or that way. She paused in the madness to catch her breath and bearings. She glanced at the giant fountain, damaged from a battle that had gone down when her father was a child, and paused. The ministry had made the decision to not repair or replace it. Large chunks of marble were missing, and while the water still poured from it, the basin that contained the water had broken and water leeched from the cracks and breaks, spreading on the floor. A spell had been placed to keep it from spreading very far from the base.

"Move it," a gruff voice growled as a solid shoulder connected with Lily's shoulder, knocking her aside. She was tempted to pull her wand and jinx him but she reminded herself that she was a long time out of Hogwarts. It would not do well for her to jinx a fellow witch or wizard. Instead she steadied her nerves and headed toward the bank of lifts, crowding into a car.

The lift seemed to know where to go automatically. It was almost like magic, and Lily giggled to herself at the thought, glancing up at the mass of circling paper airplanes, thinking there had to be a better way to get interdepartmental memos from floor to floor. She was so wrapped up in her thoughts that she didn't realize that the lift had come to a stop and everyone was glancing around.

"Who's floor is this?" a voice piped up from the sardine crowd. Lily glanced up at the sign above the lift door. It said 'Minister of Magic' in elegant scrolling letters.

"Oh, mine, sorry," Lily said and the mass of people parted like the red sea, allowing her to exit. "I thought it'd take longer."

"Minister's floor is priority," a witch explained while a few others just rolled their eyes. Lily blushed and hurried off. She would have to remember that for the future, so not to be so far back in the lift. The doors to the lift slammed shut and the departure caused the briefest of breeze that ruffled Lily's hair.

The hallway on the Minister's floor was eerily silent. It was the top floor of the ministry's building with giant sky lights in the ceiling, which would probably let in tons of light if it wasn't threatening rain outside. Without the natural light, the foyer was dreary. A giant semicircle desk flanked on both sides by a spanning wall and overstuffed chairs greeted her. There wasn't a single soul around.

"Hello?" Lily called out as she approached the desk.

"Hello," a deep voice said and Lily spun around, hand to her heart. "Did I scare you?"

"Merlin, yes," Lily said glaring at Damon standing there. He grinned at her and held out a cup of coffee.

"I figured you'd want to see a friendly face," Damon explained as Lily sipped the coffee. Her expression was priceless, caught between surprise and happiness.

"How'd you know how I like my coffee?" Lily asked him. He laughed.

"I just remember," he explained dismissively waving his hand in the air. "And don't flatter yourself thinking I only trekked all the way up here to see your smiling face. I had to deliver this report to the minister. Is he in yet?"

"I, uh, I have no idea," Lily frowned slightly. "I only got here a moment ago. How'd you get up here? I didn't hear a lift."

"Lily, Lily, Lily," Damon grinned at her. "Department of Auror Affairs has its ways."

"Ah, damn. More Auror secrets," Lily wrinkled her nose a little, shaking her head. "Well, if you're in a hurry, and since I've been so unceremoniously tossed into this position of Secretary to the Minister, I can deliver that to him when he arrives."

"Oh, no can do Lily," Damon said withdrawing the file folder from her reach. "There's not much in the ministry that has to be hand delivered by official personnel. Auror related, though, must be kept under lock and key."

"It must be nice to be so important," Lily teased as a large man entered the room from a private grate. He was nearly twice as tall as Lily and held himself in an intimidating stance. Lily recognized him immediately. "Minister Parker."

"Please, Lily," the man said waving the air in front of him dismissively. "Obadiah."

"Minister Obadiah-"

"No, Lily. Just call me Obadiah," he said as he strolled over to where Damon and Lily were standing sipping coffee. "Damon, my coffee?"

"Yes, sir," Damon replied holding out the other cup he had been holding.

"And you have the report I see," Minister Obadiah Parker said as he strolled over to the solid wall. Lily wasn't sure what he was going to do. She half expected him to whip out his wand and do some sort of knock with it, like the brick wall behind The Leaky Cauldron. Instead, he walked right in as if the wall wasn't even there. Damon was on his heels and Lily just stared.

"Lily, come on," Damon tossed back over his shoulder in a rough whisper as he crossed the threshold between the antechamber and Minister Parker's office. Lily jogged toward the wall, remembering her mother's words the first time she had crossed the barrier for Platform 9 3/4: Don't hesitate. Lily jogged through and was surprised to find Minister Parker's office bright and sunny.

"Artificial sunlight," Minister Parker explained as Lily stood blinking.

"Ah," Lily replied. She had never been in his office. When he had recruited her for the position, a favor for Draco Malfoy no doubt or in memory of her father, he had traveled to her home and place of work to interview and entice her to take the position and to return to London.

"Lily, if your don't mind sitting in and taking notes on this debriefing," Minister Parker said gesturing to one of the chairs in the room. Lily opted for one by a large plate window, pulling out her Quik Quill and parchment pad, glancing curiously at Damon. Her heart picked up tempo when he looked at her and flashed her a quick smile.

"Ready?" Damon mouthed while the Minister of Magic settled behind the large desk. Lily nodded.

For the next twenty minutes, Damon debriefed the minister on all things Auror. Lily's quill was going a mile a minute and her head spun. She was used to things like trolls, vampires, and even werewolves, but it had been so long since she'd been caught up in the day to day world of all things magical and mystical, it had been easy to push them from the forefront of her mind.

"One final thing, sir," Damon said as he glanced over at Lily. Something in the change in his tone and his hesitation to speak, even briefly, made Lily sit up and take notice. "We're having some issues with a certain vampire population again."

"The Argentineans? Again? Seriously?" sighed the minister, pinching the bridge of his nose. "I swear, I am getting so sick of them. What's the problem now?"

"They believe that the treaty hasn't been fully upheld."

"What's the game plan?"

"Mr. Malfoy is thinking about sending a very small team down to discuss with them their options," Damon explained as he closed his folder. "With your approval, obviously."

"Obviously," the minister parroted. "I'll send the approval letter down with Lily later. But I want it to be clear that the ministry's patience on this matter was used up years ago. I want full and complete cooperation from our agents otherwise I'm putting a stake in the operation and pulling our agents out."

"Good one, sir," Damon applauded though he didn't laugh at the minister's play on words. "So, we should receive the approval letter by call of business tomorrow?" The minister glanced at Lily, who nodded.

"Call of business, then," Minister Parker said dismissively. Damon stood and Lily copied his movement. "Good day, Damon."

"Good day, Minister Parker," Damon replied and he glanced at Lily, trying to gauge her reaction to the conversation. She prided herself on her stone facade. She had spent the last nine years perfecting her ability to hide her emotions. Inside her heart ached. Scorpius and James had headed to Argentina. It was where they were supposed to travel from on their wedding day. James had made it out, just to die at St. Mungo's. Scorpius hadn't.

"Lily, before you walk him out, can you give me your notes so that I can re-read them for dissemination among the ministry?" Minister Parker requested.

"Of course," Lily handed over the pages of notes she'd taken during the briefing. He took them wearily, without even looking at Lily. Lily followed Damon out of the bright office and back into the dimmer, dreary antechamber.

"So, Lily," Damon said finally looking at her.

"Damon?" Lily breathed. There were so many questions that she wanted to ask him, even if she knew that he'd not answer a single one. She didn't know what frustrated her more, that he knew things or that he couldn't share.

"You know I can't discuss it," Damon cut her off.

"Not even for me?" Lily tried to flirt with him. He cocked his eyebrow up.

"You know the answer to that," he replied. "And you know you can't share anything you heard."

"Or go digging, I know," Lily sighed. Damon put his hand on her shoulder and squeezed it lightly. He didn't say anything for a long stretch of time, just stared at her as if he were contemplating saying more, before he dropped his hand.

"How about we catch some drinks and dinner after work," Damon suggested and it sounded more like a command than a question. Lily frowned slightly.

"I actually have plans tonight," Lily said with a slight shrug. If Damon was disappointed, he didn't let it show on his face.

"Some other night then," he said. He turned and walked toward a much smaller lift, one that Lily hadn't noticed until he walked to it. She watched as he tapped the frame with his wand and the door melted away. He turned and threw her one last look before stepping over the threshold and the door materializing back into place.

"Yeah," Lily replied to the empty room.

She spent the better part of her day preparing scrolls and fetching beverages for important visitors. She knew deep down it was a waste of her talents but she hadn't been able to do much healing since her wedding day. Oh, she could handle the simple scraped knees or broken arm, but anything more had her turning inside herself. She just couldn't stomach the big stuff anymore.

"Lily," a voice interrupted her thoughts and she looked up from her desk to see Minister Parker standing there, cloak in hand.

"Sir?" Lily replied.

"I'm heading out," he said checking an ornate pocket watch. "It's already late. I know your son's visiting family, but don't burn yourself early on."

"I'll head home after I finish up here," Lily promised as she gestured to the letter she was scribing for the minister's meeting in the morning. He nodded and left. Lily turned back to the what she was working on, eager to finish before she was too terribly late for dinner at her dad's house. Lily hesitated, looking up across the empty room. It wasn't her dad's house anymore. Albus and Kate lived there now with their children.

Lily stood outside of the same house she'd grown up in, looking up at the aging clap board siding. Her aunt and uncle still lived nearby though they were spending a lot of time traveling. Their house was dark. Lily had hoped there would be time for her to make something for the dinner, but she had spent more time than she planned at work. Sighing, she pushed the bell and almost instantaneously the door opened.

"Aunt Lily!" Fourteen year old Tina cheered pushing the door open. "Thank Merlin you're here. Please tell my dad that I'm old enough to date."

"Tina, don't you dare drag her into this," Albus called as he grabbed up one of the smaller children before he could eat something vile off the floor. After James' daughter, Lucy, was born 3 months after Theron, Lily had lost count of the children her brothers and cousins brought into the ever expanding family. Only she, and Uncle George remained unmarried, and only Uncle George was childless.

"How's Kate?" Lily asked as she embraced her brother, ruffling the hair of the nearest ginger haired child.

"Pregnant as ever," Albus said rolling his eyes. He and Kate were giving Grandma Weasley a run for her money in the kids department.

"I can't wait until I go back to Hogwarts," huffed Tina as she plopped down on the well worn couch. "At least there I don't have to share a bed."

"Like you're some joy to share a bed with," Eleven year old Sarah taunted as she looked up from a thick book. "Hello Aunt Lily."

"Excited about going to Hogwarts?" Lily asked as she conjured up a chair to sit on. The one empty chair in the room had been her father's favorite chair and she couldn't bring herself to sit in it.

"You bet," she said. She gestured to the various shades of auburn, ginger, and brown around here. "I keep telling them we'd rather have a dog or get cable." Lily laughed.

"I bet," Lily said. She had been the only girl in the sea of just two brothers, and sometimes she thought that it was too much. She didn't even know how many kids Albus and Kate were up to anymore. At least five, if she remembered correctly. There was a lull between Sarah and the twins, which Kate was pretty sure her body was broken. Granted, after Lily lost the baby, her father, her brother, and her fiance all on the same day, Kate stopped coming to her to gripe.

"Has Theron's letter come?" Sarah asked nervously.

"Not yet," Lily assured her and the girl looked relieved. Sarah, Theron, James' daughter, Lucy, and Rose's daughter, Tabby would all be first years this year. Lily had gone to Hogwarts without anyone in her family her age, and her son would be accompanied by three cousins. Lily smiled at the thought. Theron liked his cousins, aside from the fact that he found them to be too girly.

"Do you think we'll get them soon?" Sarah asked.

"Probably in the next few weeks," Lily promised.

"Dad wants Sarah to be in Gryffindor, since I'm in Slytherin," Tina interjected. Lily glanced at Sarah, who was twisting a bookmark in her hand.

"Sarah, I'm sure that your dad will be happy with whichever house you end up in," Lily promised with a smile. "I was the first in Slytherin from our family, your sister was second. And if you end up in Slytherin, your dad will be happy for you."

"But he'd be more happy if I ended up in Gryffindor," Sarah's voice dropped. "I hear them talking about it when they don't think I can hear."

"Obviously we can hear," Tina grumbled as she rolled her eyes. "The dead can hear them fight."

"Tina!" Sarah gasped, looking at Lily. Lily smiled.

"It's okay, Sarah. People fight. It doesn't always mean something," Lily said.

"Did you and... did you ever fight with someone you were supposed to love?" Sarah asked dejectedly. Tina glanced at Lily briefly, trying to hide the look of interest on her face.

"Oh Merlin, yes! All of the time!" Lily laughed quietly. "Theron's dad and I were like oil and water sometimes. But I'd like to believe that if he were still alive, we would have made it work at all cost, even if that meant occasionally having to fight loudly."

"Well, I don't like it. Not one bit," Sarah said crossing her arms against her chest. Lily nodded solemnly but didn't say anything else. She had been where Sarah sat now, younger than maybe even Sarah, when her parents had a row over something that was seemingly unimportant all these years later.

"I wish they'd stop having kids," Tina grumbled and she picked up one of the tattered books of the table, a spell book from her second year. "I'm the oldest and I still get hand me downs."

"So does Petri," reminded Lily.

"Yeah, but Lucy gets new books because there are four of them going this year and not enough used books to go around," Tina's words were bitter.

"I don't mind used books," Sarah promised as she took the book and held it to her as a shield. Lily smiled at them.

"How about this, Tina," Lily dropped her voice to a whisper so that one of the smaller kids couldn't over hear her. "When you get your letter, owl it to me at the ministry or my home. I'll take care of it."

"Do you really mean it, Aunt Lily?" Tina barely contained her excitement. "I mean really, really? Won't my parents be mad?"

"You're my niece, Tina, and I'll already be shopping for Theron's books," Lily promised. The once sullen teenager launched herself into her Lily's arms and squeezed.

"Oh, thank you thank you thank you!" squealed Tina loudly. "I promise, I'm going to be the best pupil ever at Hogwarts."

"Psht," Albus snorted as he walked into the room. "Your Aunt Lily broke all those records when she went." Tina's face fell a little as she retreated to the room that she and Sarah shared, Sarah slipped behind her book, and Lily frowned at him.

"Albus," Lily chastised.

"What's her problem?" Albus grumbled as he tossed himself in the chair. He looked haggard and older than his mid thirties, with graying patches of hair here and there, the start of a scraggly beard, and tired, drooping eyes.

"I can't explain it to you," Lily shook her head. She looked at her brother and tried to look past the weariness to the boy she'd grown up with as a child. He was in there, somewhere, crushed under the weight of loss and responsibility, not just to his kids and wife, but to his sister, his niece, and his nephews. He was the patriarch of the Potter family now.

"Lily," Kate said wearily as she came into the room. Lily thought her sister in law could use as much of a break as Albus.

"I was wondering," Lily started with the plotting. "Maybe Sarah and Tina can stay with me in a few weeks, when Theron comes back, to give you two sometime together and with the younger ones."

"I can even handle their supply shopping, no problem," she added looking at the suspicion in her brother's eyes.

"What's the catch?" Albus asked.

"No catch, big brother," Lily promised, crossing an x over her heart like she had when she was a very little girl. "I miss the time I spent with Tina, and I love having Sarah over."

"What about your ministry job?" Kate asked as she absentmindedly rubbed her rounded stomach.

"The girls and Theron are old enough to stay at the house by themselves, and I'm getting a fireplace installed so you can pop your head in and chat them up whenever you want," Lily explained. "The house is just so lonely with Theron and I."

"Must be nice," Albus muttered to himself and Kate glared at him. "What? Well, it must be!"

"I haven't peed or showered alone in years and you're complaining about being lonely?" Kate screeched at him. Sarah clamped her hands over her ears and ran up the stairs. One of the smaller kids stopped chewing on the leg of the wooden table to look. "Now look what you've done, Albus."

"Me? You're the one who's always-"

"HEY! That's enough!" Lily snapped, magnifying her voice with her wand. Albus and Kate both looked battle shocked, their mouths hanging open as they looked at her. "I don't know what's wrong, you don't share it with me, but this isn't healthy for anyone."

"It's just so hard," Albus' voice echoed the defeat written on his face. Kate buried her own face in her hands and released a loud, shuddering sob. Lily felt horrible for yelling at them, but it had to be done. Her nieces and nephews deserved a peaceful home.

"Let me take Sarah and Tina for a while," Lily offered. "Give you guys a break."

"I hate that I can't give them everything they want or need," his voice broke under the strain of threatened tears and Lily knew that this was more than just being poor, this was severe poverty. She looked around more focused now and saw that the place was clean but only because it was bare of more than the very minimum. It made her heart ache.

Ginny had talked of her upbringing briefly, to say that her parents weren't rich so most everything was either handmade or second hand, but there was always love and warmth. Under Grandma Weasley, her children didn't suffer. Lily thought of Tina, remembering how elite and sophisticated and rich everyone in Slytherin had been. Her heart ached even more.

"Let me help you," Lily begged. Her brother looked up, anger in his eyes, pride burning his soul, and somewhere deep in there, Lily could see he was thankful to unload just a bit of the burden he'd been carrying since their father had died and left him to care and support his family on his own.


	5. Chapter Four

**Disclaimer:** The plot is mine, some of the characters are borrowed, the world is not mine.

* * *

**Chapter Four**

It had been two of the longest weeks of Lily's life. She was settling in well as the secretary to the minister of magic, even if it wasn't her favorite thing to be doing. In honesty, she missed being a healer. She found herself daydreaming about it when she wasn't writing scrolls and attending briefings. Lily wondered if she was fooling herself joining the ministry. She sighed, resting her head on the door to her apartment, for a moment letting the cool metal ease the pounding that was taking up residence in her head.

"MUM!" Theron shouted excitedly as he threw the door open. Lily nearly fell on her face before she caught herself. Tina and Sarah were there, grinning as if their favorite person walked in the door. Lily smiled and entered.

"It's good to see you, too," Lily said but Theron wasn't listening. He was up on his toes, bouncing back and forth between his tip toes and the balls of his feet, waving a piece of parchment wildly.

"I got my LETTER!" Theron cheered. Lily's face blossomed into a giant grin and she hugged her son tightly.

"Oh, Theron! I'm so happy for you," Lily said spinning her son in a wild circle. She squeezed him tight and looked to her nieces. "Sarah?"

"Me too!" Sarah squealed running into Lily's arms, receiving the same spinning hug. When Lily released Sarah, she was breathless and dizzy, with laughter spilling out.

"I say that this counts for a little shopping," Lily announced as Tina held out her own letter for Lily to see. Lily didn't spin her, instead, she hugged her and the two headed toward the kitchen to start supper.

"Oh, you really mean to keep your promise?" Tina dared to ask, gripping her letter to her chest. Lily nodded.

"Of course," Lily said and Tina joined in the chorus of squealing and laughter. Lily watched through the arch into the living room where Tina, Sarah, and Theron were spinning in a ring, hands clasped. The laughter echoed off the walls of the apartment. They didn't even bother stopping when the door bell rung. "I'll get it."

Lily opened the door to see Damon standing there. Lily was grinning, lifted from her long day of work with the easy laughter of her nieces and son. He couldn't help but smile back at her as she pushed the door open in an unspoken offer of entry. Lily turned her back and headed toward the kitchen. Damon closed the door and followed her.

"What are they so excited about?" Damon asked.

"They got their letters," Lily beamed proudly.

"I remember that feeling," Damon grinned at the brief memory. He looked at her. "I came by to see if you wanted to catch dinner, but I see you have company."

"It's okay. Just family," Lily dismissed. "I'm making dinner now. You're welcome to stay."

"Okay," Damon agreed. He watched as Lily gathered things from the pantry and ice box.

"Hope you like pasta," Lily tossed over her should as she looked back at him. His eyes weren't on her, instead he was staring out across the room at Theron with a sad look on his face. "Damon?"

"Oh, yes, pasta's good," he replied pulling his gaze off of Theron.

"Are you okay?" Lily asked him as she stepped quietly towards him. She could see that he wasn't. He didn't say anything, didn't shake his head. His eyes dropped to the floor and he took a deep breath.

"I have to go," he said abruptly as her hand touched his arm. He turned and fled the apartment. Lily let him go. Whatever his issue, it wasn't her place to figure them out.

"Mum?" Theron appeared in the kitchen. "Where'd Damon go?"

"He had to go, couldn't stay for dinner," Lily replied honestly. She smiled and brushed some of Theron's hair out of his face. "Now, let me get this dinner cooked and we can eat."

"Can we go to Diagon Alley tomorrow?" Theron asked excitedly.

"It'll have to wait until this weekend," she explained. "I have to work."

"Oh, okay," he grumbled.

"Go play while I make dinner," Lily laughed. Her son's pout blossomed into a smile as he ran off to join his cousins. Lily shook her head as she prepared dinner.

When the plates were cleared and the kids settled on the couch to watch a movie, Lily picked up a plate she had made up for Damon and quietly slipped from the apartment. She walked down the hallway, plate balanced on her hand as she knocked. It wasn't until her second knock that the door opened. Lily faltered as she looked at him.

Damon stood in the doorway, clad in his jeans. His hair was messed up, the brown locks pulled this way and that as if he had tried unsuccessfully to pull his own hair out. His eyes were red-rimmed and swollen, if only slightly, against the tanned skin. His expression was clearly one of confusion tinged with grief.

"Lily, what are you doing here?" the gravelly sound of Damon's voice seemed to crawl inside her and twist slightly. Lily took an unperceivable step back.

"I, uh, brought you dinner," Lily offered, directing attention to the plate and away from the sudden onslaught of feelings trying to take up residence inside. He cleared his throat slightly.

"Thank you," Damon offered as he pushed the door open. Lily followed him into the darkened apartment, closing the door behind her as she followed him into the kitchen, a mirror of her own. She placed the plate on the counter and turned to look at him.

"Do you want to talk about what's bothering you?" Lily asked him. Damon scowled slightly. "You can pretend that nothing is, but I saw your face in my apartment and I see your face now. We have known each other for a very long time. I'd like to think you wouldn't lie to me."

"Lie to you?" Damon smirked. "It's part of the job."

"Okay, so the Auror thing, I'm sure you've lied to me plenty, Damon," Lily tossed at him carelessly with a wave of her hand. "I mean on a personal level. Obviously, something bothers you... and I'm going to guess that it has to do with my son. Do you have a problem with my son, Damon?" Her final sentence was full of weight, and under that weight lingered a touch of heat.

"Whoa, easy Lily," Damon put his hands up in defense. "I don't have a problem with Theron. Theron is a great kid, I can see that."

"Then what, because I'm having a hard time understanding your reaction to him," Lily demanded.

"You don't see it?" Damon asked incredulously.

"See what?"

"How can you not look at Theron and see Scorpius? He looks the same, sounds the same," Damon burst out, shaking his head. "I look and I try to see Theron, but all I see is my best friend. I've tried to separate the two, but I can't."

"Damon, Theron and Scorpius aren't the same person. I'll admit it, Theron does favor Scorpius quite a bit, in looks and manners," Lily replied as she traced the pattern of the natural stone counter top. "But there are many ways that they're dissimilar."

"I miss him," the crack in Damon's voice crushed Lily's heart. She whipped her head up to look at him. He stood within reaching distance.

"I miss him too," Lily admitted quietly. "If he hadn't died..." She sighed.

"Seeing Theron with his letter and celebrating reminded me of when Scorpius and I got ours," Damon said dejectedly. "We thought we'd be best friends forever. I thought I worked through all this... until I saw Theron today."

"Oh, Damon," Lily went to him without thought and wrapped her arms around him, realizing two seconds too late that he was shirtless. She paused only for a moment and pushed away all the doubt in her head, resting her head on his collarbone. He was only a inch or two taller than Scorpius had been, and it had been so long since she'd been this close to a man.

"Lily," there was warning in his tone. Lily could hear it in his voice, but his arms were warm and strong and she didn't step away from him. He hesitated before he wrapped his arms around her and held her.

"I know that growing up, I was a source of a lot of conflict for you guys, the annoying little girl who fawned over Scorpius and that didn't even seem to end, ever, as apparent from the way my family affects you so much. I'm sorry for that," Lily squeezed him a little tighter. "I have to believe that Scorpius would want his favorite people to be happy, that's why I don't break down when Theron gives me that Malfoy smirk, or the way his eyes sparkle when he's up to no good."

"Lily, please," Damon groan as he tried to shift away from her. Lily held on tighter, turning her face in towards his flesh.

"I've had to come to terms with losing Scorpius, my dad, and my brother all on the same day," Lily continued. "I'm not going to pretend it was easy, or that I don't have my moments, but the worst thing you can do is to run away."

"I didn't run away," he challenged as he tried to pull away. "I just left."

"Because Theron reminds you of Scorpius," Lily retorted.

"He does, but that's not-"

"Theron isn't Scorpius, but he's a great kid," Lily continued.

"Because I see Scorpius when I see Theron, and if Scorpius was here, these feelings would be wrong... how I feel would be wrong." He implored. Without warning, he kissed her. It wasn't a quick plant of lips on lips from the previous encounter, or even a brush against the cheek. It was a full-on assault to her senses, his warm hands pulling her hard against him, tongues intertwining with the heat of breath.

Lily couldn't help the sound that escaped her, a faint and fully feminine moan, caught somewhere between her pounding heart and the curl of desire behind her navel. Her hands slid up the strong cords of muscle, fingers spreading from her palms against the plane of his back before her nails edged against his flesh. She could feel him intimately, hard and willing, against her. She didn't have it in her to pull away and he seemed unwilling to release her.

"MUM?" Theron's voice echoed down the corridor loud enough to cause both to freeze. It was reminder enough to have Damon pulling away. Lily turned away from him without another word, and headed out of Damon's apartment, coming face to face with her son and two nieces.

"Just bringing some dinner to Damon," Lily dismissed as she closed Damon's door behind her. Her son shrugged and ran back down the hallway, Sarah on his heels, but Tina was more observant.

"You look guilty," Tina pointed out. She grinned at her aunt knowingly. Lily blushed. "He's good looking, even if he's old."

"Oh hush," Lily laughed as she propelled her niece back toward her apartment.

"No one would blame you," Tina teased. "Women have needs."

"Tina!" Lily exclaimed. "You shouldn't have any opinion on any of this. You're too young to have any thoughts about the sort."

"Oh, please," Tina rolled her eyes. "You're telling me that you didn't like anyone when you were my age, or that you didn't notice some fine wizard decked out in his finest robes?"

"Well," Lily wasn't able to suppress her smile.

"Aha! Thought so," Tina teased.

"I'm pretty sure it's close to bed time," Lily closed the front door behind her, locking it. "Good night, kids."


	6. Chapter Five

Disclaimer: I can only claim the plot.

* * *

Chapter Five

The streets were filled to the brim with shoppers, house elves struggling under the heavy weight of packages while mothers and fathers shopped for their children heading off to school in the coming weeks. Theron, Sarah, and Tina were being uncharacteristically patient with Lily as she felt compelled to chat a moment with the various people she had come in contact as her duties as the minister's personal assistant. If she hadn't been so distracted, she might have picked up on it sooner.

"Guys, I'm so sorry," Lily said for the fifth time that afternoon as they pushed their way into the bookstore to get the required books.

"It's okay, Aunt Lily," Tina said as she salivated over the nearly new and new text books. Her fingers traced the embossing on the book closest to her.

"Why don't you two head to Uncle George's," Lily suggested to the two younger kids, giving Lily and Tina the freedom to wander the store and walk among the books without the need to hurry. The two skipped out of there before Lily had finished.

Lily and Tina walked into the crowded bookstore and began gathering the books Theron and Tina would need. Sarah would have Tina's old books, though Sarah didn't mind the hand me downs, Lily thought she'd like to do something special for Sarah as well. Tina was lusting over the shiny new covers of the new text books, and Lily went off toward the bookshelf where she first spoke to Scorpius. Her breathing halted as she imagined him standing above her, that look of surprise and contempt in his eyes as he wrongly classified her as a Weasley.

"Aunt Lily?" Tina asked, her hand on the witch's arm. "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine," Lily said as she brushed the stray tear she knew had betrayed her. "This is the place where Scorpius talked to me the very first time." Lily smiled.

"What did he say?" Tina asked clasping her hands tightly against her heart.

"He accused me of being a Weasley," Lily laughed.

"Why?"

"My hair," Lily giggled slightly. "It used to be more auburn than it is now."

"What did you say to him?" Tina sighed.

"I told him I was a Potter," Lily explained. Tina giggled.

"Did you know then that you loved him?" Tina asked. Lily shook her head.

"Not yet. It was a slow thing, and Scorpius wasn't on board with it at first," Lily sighed softly. She smiled. "It took a lot of convincing him that I wasn't too young."

"What really happened to him, Aunt Lily?" Tina asked as they queued up to pay for the books and have them delivered to Lily's home.

"He died, when you were little," Lily explained simply.

"I know that, but how? My parents never talked about it, or Grandpa or Uncle James," Tina asked frustrated. Lily blew out her breath, almost as if it had been knocked out of her. Lily saw a few people looking at them curiously.

"How about we finish up here, and then I'll tell you what I know," Lily promised quietly. "Tonight, when Sarah and Theron are asleep."

"Ok," Tina nodded as they pushed the books across the counter for purchasing, watching as the witch behind the counter conducted with her wand. The books stacked and packed themselves, wrapped in brown paper and twine. Lily handed over the gold coins, the witch took them and sent the books off to wait for them at home.

The two joined with Theron and Sarah, who were gleefully chattering with Great ol' one eared Uncle George over some jars of powder. He smiled at Lily, a twinkle in his eye as Theron tried to convince Sarah to be a test subject to the powder. Lily placed her hand on Theron's shoulder and he jumped, causing Sarah to giggle.

"How's my favorite niece doing?" Uncle George asked. Lily grinned.

"You don't have favorites, Uncle George," Lily pointed out as the old man kissed her cheek. He chuckled.

"But if I did, you'd be her," he retorted. He leaned forward, dropping his voice. "Lily is more like me than anyone else in the family, and she gave me the best birthday present. Ever."

"You did?" Theron asked her.

"You, silly!" Tina laughed. "You and Uncle George share a birthday."

"Oh yeah!" Theron laughed.

"I'd better get them going," Lily said as she put her arm around Theron's shoulders. "You look quite busy as usual, unless these two want to skip getting their wands today."

"It was great seeing you, but we must go!" Theron said loudly. Sarah nodded emphatically.

"Always great," Sarah squeaked out with a laugh and the two headed straight for the exit. Tina followed them out the door.

"You take care, Lily," Uncle George said and the smile slipped slightly from his face. There, beneath the whiskers and sparkling eyes was that same touch of sadness that plagued Lily's heart. George had lost his twin brother during the Battle of Hogwarts, so he knew better than most what it was like to lose a brother.

"Always, Uncle George," Lily said quietly as she headed toward the door. She turned and looked at him. "Will you be at Grandma Weasley's for my birthday dinner?"

"Honey, I wouldn't miss it for the world," he said and his eyes held that sparkle again.

"Good," Lily smiled and she pushed the door open, tapping it with her wand. She stepped out onto the cobble street and headed toward Olivander's, the only place any respectful witch or wizard should go to get their wand.

Lily waited patiently as Theron and Sarah both took a healthy amount of time letting their wands choose them. Theron grinned at her the moment boy and wand were united. She remembered that awe and the hum of magic between witch and wand, or in Theron's case, wizard and wand. She reminded them both that until they were fully fledged witches and wizards, they were not allowed to do magic out of school. Reluctantly, they boxed up their wands and headed to lunch before Lily pulled out the port key she had commissioned for the trip home.

While Sarah and Theron went to unpack their waiting school things, to play with the scales and knock on the cauldrons, Lily sunk into the chair at the table and Tina went to work making sandwiches. She kept tossing looks at Lily, and Lily was aware that Tina was chomping at the bit to continue the conversation started earlier. Lily rolled her wand between her fingers, thinking deeply. Hidden behind the wall in her room, a secret safe she had conjured to hide away the broken pieces of Scorpius' wand, still stained with blood.

"This is really good, Tina," Lily said with a smile as she tucked into the sandwich.

"Yeah, Tina," Theron replied with his mouth full of meat, cheese, and bread.

"Theron, don't talk with your mouth full," chastised Sarah. Theron swallowed, guilt written on his face. Lily grinned. Sarah would definitely keep Theron out of trouble at Hogwarts. Lily could only hope that Sarah and Theron were in the same house together, whatever it might be.

Dinner was filled with a lot of laughs, and Lily was struck with the thought that this would have possibly have been their every day meal had Scorpius lived. The house would have been filled to the rafters with children, the sound would have been deafening and the house never clean, but Lily couldn't imagine a happier way to live. She took a sip of water to clear the forming lump in her throat.

Once Sarah and Theron were tucked into their beds, Tina and Lily curled up in Lily's bed to talk. Tina wrapped her arms around her raised knees watching Lily raptly as she spoke of her love for Scorpius. Tina sighed and giggled appropriately as Lily went through the story, the push and pull of her relationship, hesitating only when her behaviors were less than model.

"Oh, Aunt Lily," Tina sighed, hand to her heart. "He sounds like he was the perfect boy!"

"Scorpius certainly had his moments," Lily promised. "But for every push, there was a pull, and every stupid thing he did, I forgave him."

"How did he die?" the whispered question gave Lily pause for a moment, despite knowing it was coming.

"Scorpius was an Auror, like your dad and Uncle James," Lily started quietly. She fiddled with a loose string on the afghan across her lap. "I don't really know all the details, being that Aurors are incredibly tight lipped about their careers. Our wedding had been postponed a few times already, and I was losing patience with the whole thing. Last minute, Scorpius was called away."

"Where did he go?" Tina gasped.

"I... I'm not really sure, to be honest. I have my suspicions, but I don't know for sure," Lily admitted. "I made him promise to be back for our wedding. I in so much threatened him to be back in time to meet me at the altar."

"But he didn't make it," Tina murmured. Lily shook her head.

"I was standing there, Damon had just presented me with my locket, and Uncle James aparated into my bridal suite," Lily explained. "He died in my arms, or basically so. I have never felt so lost, so in shock. I was in physical pain from the loss of my pregnancy, covered in his blood and bleeding from the pregnancy."

"Oh, Aunt Lily," Tina crawled toward her and wrapped her arm around Lily. Lily smiled through her tears and hugged her niece back.

"Before he died," Lily continued wiping the tears from her face quickly. "James presented me with the broken halves of Scorpius' wand. I knew between the blood and the wand, Scorpius couldn't have survived that. I could feel the snap of my heartstrings to this man I had fancied one way or the other since I was eleven."

"You still have it, don't you?" Tina inquired curiously. Lily nodded, climbing out of bed and heading to the wall. She touched her wand to it, drawing a square with a circle in the middle. The wall melted away to show a strong box. Lily held her hand up to it, hovering just above the metal panel. It opened with a long, complaining creak. Lily pulled out a box and returned to sitting on the bed, setting the box between them. Flipping the box open to show the wooden halves, still glistening as if the blood was fresh rather than stained and dried.

"I couldn't get rid of it," Lily confessed with an apologetic smile.

"We should have a séance!" Tina exclaimed looking over the edge of the case. Lily pulled back sharply.

"Tina, no," Lily shook her head. "I've mourned him, I've let him go. I don't want to drag up old feelings again and again, and I don't want to disturb him if he's resting peacefully."

"But Aunt Lily, don't you want to say good bye to him? I know they didn't recover his body from Argentina," Tina retorted. Her eyes went wide and she clamped her hand over her mouth.

"Tina?!" Lily cried out.

"Aunt Lily, I'm sorry! I shouldn't have-"

"How do you know about Argentina?" Lily demanded.

"I... I overheard my dad talking to someone, I don't know who," Tina rambled, twisted her hair around her finger. "I'm sorry, Aunt Lily. I didn't mean to say anything."

"Do... do you know anything else?" Lily asked hesitantly. Tina shook her head.

"I just know he and Uncle James were in Argentina, nothing else," Tina promised with tears streaming down her face. Lily hugged her tightly.

"I'm sorry I snapped, Tina, sorry," Lily cried. "Sometimes, though, I just think if I could talk to him. Maybe if I could find out why he died, I would feel less hurt and misery over it."

"I wish I knew more to tell you," Tina confessed as she hugged her aunt tightly.

"It's okay, Tina, really," Lily composed herself. "I'll finish the story, if you'd like."

"Please," Tina encouraged as she joined Lily in wiping away her tears.

"Damon and my friend, Marshall, I don't know that you remember him, he has been out of my life for a few years now, anyways they brought me home and cleaned me up to go to the hospital to see James," Lily explained.

"But I thought he'd died," Tina interjected.

"He had, but they were still fighting for his life," Lily explained. "I stood in the living room, where that big rug is now, and nearly bled to death from the pregnancy loss. I had an old wound that the pregnancy ruptured and if they hadn't been here, I'd have died."

"They saved your life," Tina murmured. Lily nodded.

"It was touch and go for a few weeks," Lily added. "When I came to, my brother was dead, my fiancée was lost forever, and my father had collapsed from a heart attack. He never recovered, though I can't blame him for finally succumbing to the life after. "

"He lost a lot of people," Tina pointed out.

"Yes, his parents before he learned to walk, his god father, mentors, friends, my mom, and I think losing James and the threat of losing me was just too much," Lily sighed, looking away. "They said it was a heart attack, but I know better. War had been hard on him, life had been harder, and I truly believe my dad died of a full broken heart."

"Aunt Lily, that's so sad," Tina moaned softly. "Do you think you'll ever heal?" Lily smiled sadly but shook her head slightly.

"Losing them, I think it finally broke me," Lily whispered softly. "I tried to date a few times after, when I thought I had grieved long enough. It never lasted long. Even Marshall, who had been willing to help raise Theron when I wasn't sure Scorpius and I would ever work out, couldn't survive the deep grief that seemed to plant itself deeply in my heart."

"Oh, Aunt Lily," Tina wept. "I wish you'd find happiness. You deserve so much. My dad told me how you held everyone together when Granny Ginny died and how you were the glue to the family for the longest. You're such a great mom to Theron, and I know that if you found love and had another child, you'd be a great mom to them, too."

"Oh Tina," Lily gasped shaking her head. She took a deep breath and splayed her hand over her stomach. "When I lost the baby, I lost the ability to carry any more children. It was a last ditch effort to save my life."

"Is there not a potion?" Tina begged. Lily shook her head once.

"There is something about the magic of life that no potion can recreate. It's not like re-growing a bone or a spleen. The brain, the heart, and the life organs are all unique and one of a kind, which no potion brewed can re-grow," Lily said softly. "To save my life, I had to give up bringing another soul into this world."

"I'm sorry. I didn't know," Tina whispered. Lily smiled softly.

"It's okay, Tina," Lily promised. "But it is a sticking point for many. I think that's ultimately the straw that broke the dragon's back when it came to Marshall. He wanted children and I couldn't give them to him."

"Any man who really is worth your love will be fine with it," Tina promised and Lily couldn't help but laugh.

"I'll keep that in mind," Lily said as she rose, placing the box back into the safe and drew the wand to sink it back deep beneath the plaster and paint, the wall healing until it looked as if there had been nothing amiss.

"How does that spell work?" Tina asked curiously.

"Need a safe for your room?" Lily joked. Tina grinned and shrugged. "I have it set up that when I draw the safe and then hold my hand to it, only one of my blood can open it. I figure family is safe to trust. When Theron was little, he used to hide stuff in there. I don't even know how he managed to draw the safe since he didn't have a wand, but I'm going to guess that young, innocent magic is different. I found a molded sandwich in there."

"Gross," Tina scrunched her face up and fake gagged.

"You're telling me," Lily said as she reached out for her niece. "You'd better scoot on off to bed. I'm sure Sarah and Theron will be up earlier than sanity dictates, and I have to be up for work early enough to warrant going to bed soon."

"Good night, Aunt Lily," Tina hugged her aunt before heading out of the room.

Lily double checked that the front door was locked and headed to her room. Dressed in her favorite oversized tee shirt, she climbed into bed and willed sleep to come. She stared at the ceiling, conjuring the hunger of her first kisses with Scorpius. She squirmed slightly at the thought of her first coupling with Scorpius, the heat driving her to kick away her blanket.

She closed her eyes tightly, trying to force the imagery of Scorpius burning her flesh with his touch. She tried to control her breathing as she clenched her body against the mental assault. Sheets gripped in her fists, Lily willed the need that her mind conjured as if Scorpius was there with her. She groaned as she felt the ghostly wisp of breath in her ear and her eyes shot open wide and she jumped up, looking around the room wildly.

She was alone, utterly and completely alone, but her heart pounded in her chest, her need throbbed deep within as if something had reached in her to curl the twists of pleasure and want. Her eyes searched the dark corners of her room, wildly, but she was as she first assessed, alone. She looked at her alarm clock, two hours had passed in a blink of an eye. She turned from her room, propelled by carnal awareness out of her control. She barely stopped to close her apartment door behind her, her bare feet falling silently as she ran down the hall, stopping only to pound on Damon's door.

"Lily?" Damon asked sleepily, scratching his bare chest as he peered down at Lily as she gripped the door frame for support.

"Forgive me," Lily whispered to no one in particular as she stepped forward, closing Damon's door behind her. "Forgive me."


	7. Chapter Six

A/N: Not for the faint of heart, or folks under the age of majority in their country/state/providence/whatever. Wrote this a few months back. Saved it and meant to publish it, forgot... it phased out. Had to reupload. Have to work in a few hours and I can't sleep. Enjoy.

Disclaimer: All this is the creation of someone.

* * *

**Chapter 6**

Damon opened the door to Lily standing there, a wild need in her eyes as she seemed to grip the frame of his door for support. She whispered something, the words lost on her breath and missed by him as she pushed into his apartment. She spoke again, still too quiet to hear, but he could have sworn she asked for forgiveness.

"Lily?" he asked suddenly no longer caught under the haze of sleep. He recognized the look in her eye, having seen it in the reflection in the mirror in recent weeks. A mix of need and want, twisted and swirl with the animal side of connection.

"I know it's late," she replied as she proceeded forward toward him. Damon swallowed as she reached up and touched his face. She stood on her tippy toes, chin tilted back mouth slightly open as she brushed a kiss against the stubble along his chin.

Damon dipped his chin down, claiming her mouth with unbridled fervor. He held her face in his hands, controlled as she circled her hands around his waist. He kissed her slowly, savoring the taste and warmth. He knew he should break the kiss and pull away, but she felt so good in his arms. Her hands rest firmly against his lower back, her tiny hips pressed against his corded thighs. Without premeditation, his hands left her face running down the sides of her neck, over her shoulders and down to her elbows.

He hesitated, contemplating breaking her grip on him, before his hands rested on her small waist, bunching up the material of the tee shirt in his hand. Something bumped the side of his leg and opening one eye, he was startled to see they had made their way to his massive bed. His head screamed warning that was silenced by the slightest gasping breath he made as Lily nipped his bottom lip slightly with her teeth. She pressed her body against him eagerly until the ache was too much in him not to comply and fall back with her still firmly attached to him.

Damon's palms skimmed the soft flesh of her sides before completely disappearing under her shirt. Lily moaned softly as his big hands caressed her, her mouth still firmly working his. He tried to ignore the burgeoning pressure that refused to be contained by the thin cotton of his pajama pants, failing as she struggled to remain still and straddle his hips. He fought to contain the noises that seemed to rumble from an untapped source deep inside. He was close to the point of no return, he could feel it. They were toeing the line and would plunge soon if they didn't take a step back.

"Lily," he breathed in warning. She pulled her head back, the fire in her eyes reflected in his.

"Damon," she taunted in that same breathy way. She leaned back slightly, grinding her hips into his and stripped off her shirt, tossing it aside. She stared at him, challenging. He pressed his hips up at her and she tipped forward into him, his hands gripping her hips almost painfully. He claimed her mouth with his own, battled in a passionate dance.

He found himself pinning her to the bed, her wiggling out of the last scrap of cloth hiding her body from him. He hesitated only a moment before ridding himself of his pants. Like a divining rod to water, he found himself surrounded by her, filling her tiny body with his massive frame. Burned forever in his memory would be that first moment when they came together, the gasp of breath and the way her blue eyes dilated until there was just a ring around wide black pupils, joined with the bite of her nails in his broad shoulders. He hesitated a moment, allowing her body to acclimate but she wanted nothing to do with that, drawing her hips back slightly before moving them to meet his.

He closed his eyes, burying his face in her neck and arms wrapped around her as they plunged off the cliff of sanity, unable to do or think of anything but the motions and feelings, until they both trembled then quaked with a world-ending shatter. Throats hoarse, bodies drenched in sweat, they fell apart.

Damon felt boneless next to her, all of his energy sapped. It had been long enough since he'd been with a woman, even longer before he felt anything beyond carnal release. He wracked his brains to think of a time he'd ever felt so completely satiated and came up empty. He knew he needed to turn to her, to hold her or talk to her. He closed his eyes for a second, breathing deeply through his nose in hope of quelling his staccato heart and breathing. The sweet scent of woman and love assaulted him, rousing him to another go but he was spent completely and he couldn't find the energy to turn and look at her, much less tuck himself into her for round two.


	8. Chapter Seven

Disc.: I am responsible for the plot only.

* * *

**Chapter 7**

She rolled to her stomach, arm tucked under her head as she watched him sleep. The light was dim enough to cast shadows, but bright enough to see the soft, relaxed face of the man she had just slept with. Her heart was stilling, breathing returning to normal as she lay. She dared not to reach out and touch the lace of eye lashes that rested so peacefully on his cheeks. His sensual mouth was parted ever so slightly, enough to cause Lily to stir. She clamped her mouth shut before her tongue could sneak out and trace the lines of his mouth.

She had kissed that mouth, knew how warm and safe it would be. Her eyes raked along Damon's strong jaw, over the hint of stubble that had felt rough and right against her. The junction at the base of his throat demanded to be tasted but Lily retained control over her traitorous body. She followed the path across his broad chest, the ripples of chiseled abs , hesitating before she looked lower. Her body clenched and she froze in surprise. Even relaxed and asleep, he was huge. Lily successfully stifled the giggle that tried to bubble up.

She smiled slightly. He was a mighty fine looking man. She had known him as long as she had known Scorpius, or just about, but she'd never really appreciated how good looking he was. She never looked at him as anything more than Scorpius' friend. Growing up, she had only had eyes for Scorpius. Guilt washed over her at the mental mention of Scorpius. She had slept with Scorpius' friend, and slept with him properly.

"Oh," Lily gasped. She eased from Damon's bed, her muscles complaining. She fought and lost against a moan. She was so sore. She found her shirt immediately, pulling it over her head and covering herself. She glanced around the floor, looking for her knickers. She glanced at Damon again, her eye honing on the very part of him that made it uncomfortable to walk. She had a bad feeling he had them trapped under his hips. She swore and slipped out of his apartment, trying to ignore the sticky wet feeling left behind in the quake of his love.

Lily stood alone in the shower, the water hotter than probably would have been comfortable if she wasn't in shock. Her skin pinked by the water, she stared unseeing at her reflection in the broad mirror. She crossed her stomach with her hands, barring them from sight. She frowned at her reflection before gathering clothes and dressing, climbing into her bed and burying herself in her coverlet. She tried to fight the guilt that seemed to be snaking up in her.

It didn't make sense that she would feel this way. Almost 10 years had passed, Scorpius wouldn't care who Lily was with, would he? Lily sighed and rolled over. Of course, Scorpius would only care that she was happy. Some time before dawn, she finally fell asleep.

Lily was perched at the edge of her chair, quick quotes quill hovering above a parchment scroll waiting for the start of the meeting. Obadiah Parker, Minister of Magic, came in with a rush, Damon chasing behind him with cups of coffee. Damon placed it precariously on the ledge of the desk and immediately launched into his briefing with the Minister. Lily tried not to stare at Damon.

"Lily?" the minister's voice interrupted her concentration on not looking at Damon. She jerked her head towards him.

"Sir?" Lily responded as she tried to cover the blush that crept up her face.

"Are you okay? You look a bit flushed," the minister said frowning. Lily straightened up in her chair.

"I'm fine," she promised. He nodded once and the meeting began. Lily was never happier to have a quill that she didn't have to focus on one hundred percent to get all the information. She would have failed dramatically. Every time she glanced up at Damon, her heart would stutter and something deep inside would twist with the flames of desire.

At the end of the meeting, Damon waited on Lily to give the minister the notes to peruse, leaning against her desk with his arms crossed against his chest. Lily hesitated, standing just beyond reach. His face was guarded, and she thought she saw a flash of uncertainty in his eyes.

"You left," he said quietly. Lily winced slightly at the words, despite there being no accusation or hostility.

"I'm sorry," Lily replied. She walked behind her desk and began shuffling some papers. It felt good to have something to do with her hands, somewhere for her eyes to focus on rather than that touch of hurt the threatened at the edge of Damon's expression.

"You could have said good bye," Damon suggested. Lily glanced up.

"I shouldn't have taken advantage of you like that, Damon," Lily apologized. "Truth is, I have nothing to offer you, yet took knowing how you feel about me. That's unforgivable."

"Lily-" Damon frowned.

"Damon, maybe in another life time, maybe if things were different," Lily murmured thoughtfully as her mind wandered. She shook her head. "But they're not."

"Lily, I wasn't expecting anything from you, I swear," Damon promised. He uncrossed his arms, leaning forward on her desk. Lily instinctively leaned back. "We're two consenting, unattached adults. You hardly took advantage of me." He laughed slightly.

"I just don't want things to get weird between us," Lily glanced up with a slight smile.

"Next time, just say good bye, okay?" Damon tossed at her as he began to walk away.

"Next time?" Lily laughed heartily. "Damon West, you are quite full of yourself, aren't you?" He glanced back at her, grinning.

"Once you've had West, you've had the very best," Damon taunted. Lily erupted in near hysterics.

"That's the cheesiest thing I think I've ever heard," she teased.

"See you around, Lily Evans," Damon promised with a wink.

"Good-bye, Damon," Lily retorted pointed.

"It's all I ask," he grinned at her before he walked through the magical portal between the minister's office and wherever, Department of Auror Affairs Lily suspected. She thought of visiting Rose and wondered how her cousin was doing. It had been a while since she had a girl's day with her and made a mental note to make time for it once the kids went to Hogwarts.

Lily worked diligently on her reports, but her mind would randomly wander back to the time she'd spend with Damon, filling a need she hadn't been aware of in a very long time. She frowned, throwing her quill on the desk and rubbing the back of her neck. She glanced at the clock, seeing she was late for dinner. Sighing, she picked up the quill and frowned at the ink blot that had spread over the letter she was writing, and replaced it in it's well.

She gathered her things and headed to the lift, taking it down to the nearly empty lobby. She knew Tina would have had made sandwiches rather than waiting on Lily to come home to cook dinner, still she felt bad about it already starting to grow dark. Lily hurried to the apparation point, landing in the phone vestibule not far from her building. She hurried down the sidewalk, something in her driving her ever faster up the four flights of stairs when waiting for the lift seemed like it was taking too long.

She pushed into her apartment and stopped, frowning. Sitting in her living room was Damon, with Draco, both frowning. Theron, Tina, and Sarah were sitting in a row together on the love seat, barely fitting. Lily pulled up short.

"What's going on?" Lily asked. She looked around to see that someone had rolled back the carpet, exposing a dark black mark on the other wise pristine floors. Candles were knocked aside, as well as various other items in a heap. She frowned.

"Lily, we have a problem," Draco said standing. He forced his hand through his hair.

"Problem?" Lily asked, glancing at the three rather guilty looking children.

"Underage magic, for one," Draco explained. He gestured towards the pile of things. Lily took a closer look. The first thing she noticed was Scorpius broken wand, laying among what looked like a wad of blond hair that she suspected might have been pulled from Theron's brush.

"Theron?" Lily's voice cracked slightly.

"Mum, honestly, I made them help me," Theron cried. He buried his face in his hands and wouldn't say anything more. Lily went to open her mouth, looking at Tina when Albus burst through the door with Kate, both of them look harried and upset.

"What the hell, Lily!" Albus growled as he turned on his sister. "You were supposed to be watching them and they go and try to raise the dead!"

"What?" Lily cried out.

"Dad, don't be mad at Aunt Lily," Tina begged.

"We just wanted to find out what happened to TC's dad!" Sarah exclaimed.

"So you thought you'd do a touch of difficult and illegal magic!" Albus yelled. He rounded on Lily. "Where were you tonight that left them with all this unsupervised time to conjure and practice?"

"Work, work where I go every day, Albus," Lily snapped. "If I had known, I didn't know!"

"Tina, Sarah, get your things," Kate snapped. "Its obvious you need to come home and be watched better."

"I was watching them fine," Lily challenged. "I was late ONE night."

"Well, look what that's gone and done, Lily," Kate challenged back. "I've tried to keep my opinion to myself, being that we used to be friends and all, but it's obvious that you're checked out as a parent. My children need and deserve more minding. What you do with your child is your business, but I think it's best that my child come home now where they can have adult supervision."

"Its not like I leave them alone all the time," Lily yelled as she threw her hands up in the air.

"Just when you're at work," Kate's tone was patronizing.

"I have to work, Kate," Lily challenged. "We can't all just say at home with a bun in the oven, shoving bon bons in our mouth. Do you even know how many kids you have anymore?"

"That's my wife," Albus snapped at his sister. "Don't you dare talk to her that way."

"And she can't come into MY house, talking to me that way," Lily threw back at him.

"I swear, Lily, if my children get kicked out of Hogwarts because you weren't providing even sub-adequate care, I'm going to have you hauled in front of the ministry myself, so help me Merlin," Albus yelled as he steered his wife and two daughters out of the apartment. Lily stood, staring at the door that Albus had slammed on his way out.

"Mum, I'm sorry," Theron cried softly. "I didn't know it would get us all in so much trouble. I didn't even think it was possible, and it didn't even work."

"Theron, did you eat?" Lily asked numbly.

"Yes," he meekly responded.

"You need to go to bed, now," Lily told him.

"Mum-"

"No, Theron," Lily snapped. She looked at him with fire in her eyes. "We will not talk about this right now. You will go to bed right now."

"Yes, ma'am," he whispered softly as he stood. He placed his wand on the coffee table and shuffled off to bed, not glancing at his grandfather or mother.

Lily sunk into the chair that had once been placed on the rug, the rug that had covered the black mark, the aged stain from when Lily had bled out and nearly died losing her baby. She covered her face with her hands and took a deep breath before she looked up at Draco and Damon. Both were still sitting there, looking at her.

"How much trouble are we looking at for them?" Lily asked cautiously. She ignored the stain she wanted to so desperately cover back up with the rug.

"They'll start off on probation. A year of probation," Draco explained. "In that time, if they do even so much as a sniff of magic outside of Hogwarts school ground, they'll have their wands taken and they'll be forbidden to return."

"A year," Lily murmured.

"Lily, they were doing some serious stuff," Draco continued. "They're lucky that they didn't summon anything bad, things that they couldn't control. They're lucky that the spell didn't work and they didn't raise the dead or get injured in the process."

"Yeah," Lily agreed.

"Now, I know you're not going to like this, but I'm required to confiscate everything they used in the ritual," Draco explained quietly as he conjured a box out of mid-air. Lily watched as the long white candle that was supposed to be her and Scorpius's unity candle for their wedding, bits of things, and the two halves of his wand dropped into the box. Lily watched them sadly. It was the last bit of Scorpius, being boxed up and sent away. Inside, she felt like choking on the grief she thought she'd overcome.

"I understand," Lily rose to her feet, to follow Draco and the box the front door. She gestured slightly, the door swinging open wide to allow him out. She closed it and looked back at the old stain on the floor. Sighing softly, she kneeled down and tenatively touched the stain.

"Lily?" Damon's voice was quiet but she still startled at the sound. She looked up at him, towering over her from where she kneeled.

"Damon," she replied quietly. She looked away, reaching and rolling the rug over the stain. She smoothed the wrinkle out of it and rose.

"I'm not trying to tell you how to raise your son, I swear, I'm the last person who should be giving parenting advice, but it might be better for TC to have you home more," Damon suggested. Lily shot him a look as she stood.

"You're right, Damon," Lily retorted. "You are the last person who should be giving my parenting advise. You know who should be? Scorpius should be. He should be here helping me raise our son. But he's not. He's dead. No amount of wishing is going to change that."

"Lily, I was only-"

"You should leave," Lily suggested defeated. Damon hesitated, looking at her for a moment before he nodded. He closed the door behind him and Lily sighed loudly, no longer hungry. She headed into her room, tossing her clothes in the hamper and pulling on her favorite cotton night gown.

She pulled back the blankets, climbing into her spot on the bed. She curled to her side and slid her hands under her pillow, hugging the pillow to her face. Her hand brushed something. She closed her hand around something, retrieving from under her pillow a post card. She flicked the light on without more than a snap of her fingers and held the image of some random landscape, nothing remarkable, with the words: Patagonia, Argentina printed on the front.

Lily's hand shook as she looked at the post card, slowly turning it over. It was stamped and postmarked through the muggle mail, dated the day before. Lily barely paid it any mind. Instead, she stared at the three little words that had been scrawled in that painfully familiar loops and swirls. That old wound she thought was fully healed cracked open a little.

"Oh, Scorpius," Lily cried out softly, cradling the card to her heart. "I miss you, too." She laid her head down on her pillow, eventually falling asleep holding tight to the post card, which simply said- 'I miss you'.


	9. Chapter Eight

**Disclaimer:** Some of this... I created with my own two hands, molded from clay and shaped into what is presented before you, other bits, I manipulated from someone else's world.

* * *

**Chapter Eight**

Lily crossed her arms against her chest, staring at the drawer she had been storing the ever increasing post cards that were showing up randomly in her home. At first, she thought it was a sweet way to remember him. She thought, perhaps, he'd anticipated one day that he wouldn't be there for her and that he set up the cards to come at random increments. She never saw them arrive, they'd just appear when she'd least expect them.

The messages were always sweet, or vague, and Lily would read them over and over, memorizing their words, before locking them away in her side table drawer. She didn't mention them to anyone, thinking that if they were post-humorously sent to her, that was no one business but her own. She didn't usually give them more than a second thought.

TC woke her early, despite it being a work day that she would have been up early anyways, carting a tray of toast and yogurt. She had been taking him in to work with her most days, setting him up in one of the spare offices with books to read, and today would be no different. For a minute, Lily wondered why he was bringing her breakfast in bed.

"It's your birthday, mum!" TC cheered as he nearly knocked the orange juice over.

"Oh, I can't believe I forgot!" Lily had laughed. She watched her son skip from the room to get ready for the day and she climbed free of the bed, eating the toast as she picked out her clothes for work. She went to drop the crust on the plate when she saw a corner of a postcard poking out from under the plate. She pulled it free, reading it.

She frowned at the same familiar hand writing, almost franticly scribbled on it.

I want to come home, Lily. I want to come home. Please, Lily. I want to come home.

Lily quickly dropped the card in the drawer, her heart pounding a mile a minute. She crossed her arms and she frowned, staring at the drawer as if she expected something to pop out from it. TC found her, still not dressed for work, still staring at the drawer a few minutes later.

"Theron, did you put the post card under the plate?" Lily asked quietly. TC frowned at her.

"Post card?" he asked. He shook her head. "I didn't see any post card. Why?"

"No reason," Lily replied with a frown. "I should get ready for work."

"Yeah," TC nodded. He grinned. "Great Granny Weasley is probably going to make the biggest cake ever." He skipped from the room again. Lily dressed, but she kept looking at the drawer suspiciously. In the end, she scooped up the post cards and headed out the door with her son in tow.

"Come on," she urged as she hurried down the street from the apparation point.

"Mum, I hate going in the lady's lavatory," groaned TC as the two of them pushed into the stall.

"You'd be at home right now if you and your cousins hadn't tried to contact the dead," Lily reminded him as she took his hand and helped him into the loo.

"Doesn't this strike you as weird?" TC asked as he wiggled his toes in the potty water.

"Better get used to it," Lily told him. "Tomorrow you catch the train to Hogwarts and that place is all magic, all of the time. So long as you remember your on magical probation."

"I know, I know," TC groaned. The conversation ended as they flushed themselves into the ministry. Lily held tight to her father's old briefcase in one hand, and TC's hand in the other, despite him trying to pull away.

Once TC was set up at his little desk in the spare office room, Lily headed to her desk. She glanced at the briefcase, holding the postcards. She needed to ask someone about them. Someone had to know how they were getting in to her house. The sweet gesture was turning cruel, and she needed them to now stop. Whether they had been a joke, or truly post humorously owled to her, she needed to find a way to get them to stop, because each post card felt like it was picking at old wounds that had healed but had to begun to rub her raw.

"I'm going to go grab something from the lunch cart," Lily told her son, poking her head in the door. "I'll be back in a few minutes, so behave."

"Of course, mum," TC replied looking up from one of the giant books spread out on the desk before him. He didn't hesitate to give her that famous Malfoy smirk before returning his attention back to the book he was reading. Lily nodded and headed down the lift, stopping off on the floor for Auror Affairs rather than taking it to the lobby and getting lunch. She pushed through the door and stopped, a smiling witch standing behind a desk.

"Can I help you?" the witch asked brightly. She had one of those bubble-gum personalities that grated on Lily's nerves straight off the bat.

"I'm here to, er... I need to speak with Draco," Lily told her.

"Is Mr. Malfoy expecting you?" she asked Lily, flipping through a paper calendar not unlike the one Rose had used to keep track of the schedule.

"No, I don't think so," Lily shook her head. The other witch's smile dropped slightly. "But being that I gave birth to his grandson, I'm sure he will be willing to make some time for me."

"Oh, you're Lily Potter!" the witch replied with a single nod. "Well, Mr. Malfoy isn't here, but maybe I can find someone that can assist you, unless this is a family thing?"

"Well, I'd prefer _Mr. Malfoy_, but..."

"Lily!" Rose cheered as she embraced her cousin.

"Rose," Lily grinned. Rose hugged her cousin.

"Happy Birthday," Rose laughed and started to lead Lily away. "Hold my calls, Ester."

''Will do," the witch said watching as Rose and Lily disappeared around the corner. Lily smiled at her older cousin, the door closing behind her. Lily took a seat in one of the chairs, placing the briefcase next to her while her cousin circled the desk.

"What brings you down from the Minister of Magic's office?" Rose said quietly. The laughter and smile had slipped from her face and she looked very serious.

"I need information, Rose," Lily said with a frown, flipping back the flap on the case and pulling out the stack of post cards. Lily watched Rose's face as she read through them. Rose set them down on the desk and looked at her cousin.

"Where did you get these?" Rose asked cautiously.

"They've been popping up all over the place at home," Lily explained. She flipped the flap down over the bag, and leaned back in the chair. "At first I thought that it was sweet, like he'd left them to be delievered at this point in my life, but Rose, I don't know. I don't feel like Scorpius is dead."

"Lily," Rose warned glancing away from Lily's face for a second. She frowned. "Lily, Scorpius' was the victim of a mission gone-wrong."

"I know, I know," Lily sighed brushing a tear from her cheek. She smiled. "It's hopes and wishes, and I will always have Scorpius in my heart, and I see a living, breathing version of him in my son. But part of my soul feels like there is more answers out there to questions I haven't asked."

"You shouldn't do this to yourself," Rose chided gently. "What good comes of picking at old wounds?"

"Rose, it's just... sometimes I think I can feel him," Lily murmured, pressing her hand to heart. "It's silly, I know." Lily laughed and Rose joined in a second later.

"Your love for him was profound," Rose admitted. "One that probably could outstand all tests."

"Yeah," Lily agreed. Rose stood.

"I'll... I'll look into these post cards for you Lily. No promises," Rose explained. "It's a dead in, surely, but I'll look into them."

"Thank you, cousin," Lily embraced Rose and released her. Rose opened the door to the office, holding it wide as Lily walked through. Lily expected Rose to follow, but found the door had been closed and Lily was on the outside of the door. She frowned and headed out of the Department of Auror Affairs, getting a little wave from the receptionist who was battling with an owl over a parchment.

Lily headed toward the elevator, tapping her foot while she waited for the lift. The grates and doors slid open, Lily hesitated entered as Draco and Damon stepped out, having what looked to Lily an argument. They both clammed up quick upon seeing her, both giving her a forced smile.

"Hey, Lily, what're you doing down here?" Damon asked.

"Oh, I was dropping off these weird postcards. I gave them to Rose," Lily dismissed with a flip of her hand.

"Weird post cards?" Draco asked.

"Yeah, probably nothing," Lily replied. "I'm guess that Scorpius set them up way back when he was taking those trips to Argentina."

"Argentina? What makes you think they're from Argentina?" Draco asked quietly as he shot a look to Damon. Lily would have missed it if she hadn't been looking for some sort of unspoken exchange between them.

"Oh, you know," Lily murmured dismissively again. She smiled with a slight shrug. "They say things like- 'Greetings from Sunny Argentina' and stuff."

"Oh," Damon responded.

"Rose has them now," Lily offered. "Says it's probably nothing."

"Probably nothing, I agree," Draco responded thoughtfully. Damon laughed.

"Scorpius always was a hopeless romantic at heart," Damon murmured. Lily laughed lightly.

"I should get down to the food cart and get Theron something to eat before he starts chewing up some of my books," Lily explained as she stepped on to the lift. She turned and looked at Damon and Draco, both standing there with pensive looks on their faces. "I'm sure whatever shenanigans were going down, the department will get to the bottom of it." She winked as the grates closed between her and them.

Draco turned to Damon, eyebrows furrowed and his mouth drawn in a thin line.

"I want you to rally and roust everyone. Everyone, in command central in fifteen," Draco growled quietly before he turned and stalked off in the opposite direction of the main entrance to the Department of Auror Affairs.

"Damn it, Scorpius," Damon whispered under his breath. "You and your can of worms."


	10. Chapter Nine

**Disc.**: Standard disclaimer of using but didn't create.

* * *

**Chapter Nine**

Lily stood on the sidewalk, head tilted slightly to the side with a frown on her face. People bustled around her, some bumping into her but most clearing her by milimeters as they hurried here and there. Behind her was Theron, hands on the trolley, waiting. He looked at his mother, concerned.

"Mum?" Theron nudged her with the trolley.

"Has this place always been called King's Cross?" Lily asked him. He shrugged.

"I dunno," Theron replied.

"You know, I think I've been calling it King's Crossing all these years," Lily laughed. She turned to her son and grinned. "Apparently, no one thought to correct me. Learn from my mistake."

"Gotcha, Mum," Theron laughed. "It's called King's Cross. Filed away."

"Let's get you on this train. Wait until you see it, Ther, it's amazing," Lily promised as she took over pushing the heavy trolley toward the platforms. She glanced at him. "Do you remember which one?"

"Of course! Nine and three quarters!" Theron exclaimed and whooped loudly. A few people glanced over at them, but Lily didn't pay them any mind. Her son was excited about his first day and she couldn't imagine it any other way. She paused for a second, a brief image flashing of her and Scorpius standing on the platform, arm and arm waving enthusiastically to their son. Lily swallowed the lump that had formed.

"It's best to take it at a slight run if you're nervous," Lily instructed her son with a grin. He smirked, that painfully beautiful and familiar smirk before taking off toward the barrier, it melting away as he cleared it. Lily took a deep breath and breeched it.

"Mum, it's..." Theron gasped as he stood in awe of the scarlet colored train, white plume of smoke easing out of the stack.

"I know, Theron," Lily joined him, staring at the train herself. In a flash of memory, she remembered in complete detail how Scorpius looked to her, so big and strong, that first day she was to ride the train. She took a shaky breath and pushed forward. "Let's get you settled, okay? I'm sure Sarah and Tina are around here."

"You think Uncle Albus is still mad at you?" Theron asked. Lily glanced around before focusing on him.

"If he is, it's nothing for you to worry about, okay?" Lily promised. "I shouldn't have left you guys alone so much, and I can understand his anger with me."

"I wasn't trying to get you in trouble with him, Mum," Theron promised, taking her hand with his, much like Scorpius used to do, and giving it a quick squeeze. "It's his loss."

"Oh, Ther, you're so much like your father sometimes," Lily exclaimed, throwing her arms around her sweet little boy. "I'm surely going to miss you."

"Mum," Theron complained weakly as he hugged her back. "I promise, I'll be good."

"I know you will," Lily chided. "You don't want me sending you any howlers."

"Not like your first year, huh?" Theron ribbed, causing Lily to laugh.

"I knew I shouldn't have shared that story," Lily groaned.

"No, Mum. I'm glad you did. I'm glad you shared all of Dad's stories with me," Theron shared. He took a deep breath. "Sometimes, I feel him. Right in my heart, Mum."

"He'll always be with you, Ther," Lily promised.

"I know," Theron nodded. He sighed and smiled slightly. "Guess I should go put my things on the train."

"Do you want my help?" Lily asked him. Theron scrunched his nose up, an expression that was all Lily and shook his head.

"I've got this, Mum," he told her, taking the handle of the trolley.

"I'll be right here. Don't forget to say good-bye," Lily reminded him. He nodded.

"Of course, Mum. I'll be back. I promise!" Theron tossed over his shoulder as he headed toward the train. The words cut like a knife, an echo of years passed when Scorpius made the very same promise.

"It's not the same," Lily murmured aloud to herself, starving off the killing blow that suddenly clawed at her heart.

Lily crossed her arms, watching as parents milled around her. She felt alone, really alone, for the first time in a long time. Everyone around her seemed so happy, celebrating the next stage in their little witches and wizards lives. The noise was growing deafening.

"Kind of sucks, huh?" a quiet voice offered. Lily spun around to see Maggie standing there.

"Excuse me?" Lily asked.

"The first day, their very first day," Maggie explained, gesturing to the scene before them. "Being here, seeing off your only offspring. Alone. It kind of sucks."

"Yeah," Lily agreed, her voice in that same hushed tone that Maggie used. Lily tried to remember if she'd always been so soft spoken. Lily couldn't remember any more. It had been too long.

"You're working under the minister, aren't you now?" Maggie asked. Lily nodded once, suddenly very uncomfortable.

"His assistant," Lily told her.

"Ministry jobs are very good," Maggie murmured. "I'm back in payroll, of course."

"Of course?" Lily replied questioning. Maggie looked as if she was going to say something when a young man bound up to her.

"Mum, I found the prefect's car easy-peasy," he said to Maggie. He glanced at Lily and smiled before returning his attention to his mother. "I can't wait to go to Hogsmead."

"I know, I know," Maggie said, hugging her son. She looked meaningfully at Lily, embracing her son.

"I'm going to go help some first years get their trunks on," he said as he pulled away. "I'll owl you when I get settled. I love you." Without waiting for Maggie's response, he raced back to the train. Maggie stood there, looking at Lily.

"He... oh, Merlin, he look just like James," Lily gasped, tears swimming in her eyes. She pressed her hand to her chest hard, trying to fight back the sob that was threatening to shake her. "Sounds like him, too."

"Yeah," Maggie replied with a sharp nod. She pressed a handkerchief into Lily's hand "Your boy's coming." Lily blotted her eyes quickly before plastering on a smile and turning quickly.

"Get loaded okay, Ther?" Lily asked with a bit too much levity to her voice. He paused, hesitantly nodding once.

"I did, yes," he told her. "I came to say good-bye. It's nearly time."

"Owl me when you get a chance," Lily told him as she drew him into her arms. "I want to hear all about your sorting and your house."

"Will do, Mum," Theron promised. "You'll be okay, right?"

"Of course! You do well, and stay out of trouble," Lily squeezed him tightly before releasing him. "I love you."

"I love you, too, Mum," Theron grinned before heading back towards the train. Lily watched him pause at the door, waving before he disappeared inside the car.

"Looks like we both have a very painful reminder," Maggie offered gently. Lily glanced at her, nodding once with tears in her eyes. Maggie shared the same watery smile. "I wouldn't have it any other way, except of course, having James here."

"Yeah," Lily agreed before a tiny sob escaped. "I'm sorry."

"Don't apologize, please," Maggie urged. "He was your brother."

"He was your husband," Lily squeaked, trying to mop the tears up as quickly as they flowed. Maggie dabbed her own eyes.

"I was lucky," Maggie promised. "I had some good years with him before he died. Petri still remembers him."

"Oh, Maggie!" Lily sobbed loudly, causing a few people to glance over as Lily propelled herself into the woman's arms. "If I hadn't insisted to James-"

"Don't think about it, Lily," Maggie urged in a hurried whisper. "James was a grown man. He knew what he was getting into well before he made that promise. Trust me, YOU were NOT responsible for his death. They were doomed before they even started."

Lily pulled back, looking at Maggie curiously as Albus stormed up to her, Kate in tow. Lily pulled away from Maggie, facing her brother. He stared at the two of them sternly, warning flashing in his eyes as Kate stood by, the round stomach of pregnancy obviously flattened greatly and a squalling infant in arms.

"Here to see your son off?" Albus asked, his voice hard.

"Yes," Lily replied almost timidly. She'd never feared her brother before, even as a child, but she found herself cringing slightly at the edge in his words.

"Best of luck for him," Albus replied.

"Sarah, too," Lily replied genuinely. The sharp edge to his glare softened fractionally, him nodding before departing quickly as the train whistled and began to move. Lily looked away from him, eyes searching the train for her son. She grinned as she saw his wildly waving hand and she waved back just as wildly, watching until the train was gone from sight.

Lily turned back to Maggie, only to find that she was standing alone on the platform. Around her, most of the parents had already departed, with a few stragglers being first timers. She smiled at a sobbing mother, being consoled by her husband before she apparated.

Lily opened the door to the apartment, the silence deafening. She closed the door behind her, looking around the now much too large apartment. She walked around, picking up different things that Theron had left laying about, random books and toys. She could have used her wand to return everything, but there was something more solid and certain about holding the tiny metal cars and planes in her hand, their cold weight as she entered his room and placed them in their bins.

Lily opened the small drawer on the table next to Theron's shoddily made bed to put away his a few of his little leaden army men. In the drawer, hidden poorly under a single sheet of paper were postcards. Lily sunk down on his bed, scooping up the cards. She flipped through them, each one addressed to her son, unsigned, with that painfully familiar handwriting.

She choked on the latest one, the one that must have come sometime early in the morning. She traced the words: _May your first day be great. Whatever your house, I'm proud of you._

Anger boiled up, replacing the hurt and sadness. How could he do this to her; to their son? The boy needed his father, on this day as well as any, but to arrange for these postcards to torment him like they tormented her. Lily slammed the drawer shut as the door bell chimed. She marched across the apartment and flung the door open.

"What?" Lily snapped before she could stop herself. Damon was standing there, dressed in jeans. Lily had gotten so used to seeing him in his work robes that she'd nearly forgotten what he looked like in his regular clothes.

"Did I come at a bad time?" he asked. Lily crossed her arms.

"Actually, you did," Lily told him.

"Anything I can help you with?" Damon offered. Lily looked at him for a second before dropping her arms. She grabbed his hand and pulled him in the apartment, dragging him behind her. He didn't struggle until they breeched the threshold to Theron's room. "What are we doing in here?"

"Just wait," Lily told him as she dropped his hand. She jerked the drawer open and took the postcards out. She held them out to him. Damon entered the room, sitting on the bed next to her as she sunk down on the mattress. He took the cards and flipped through them.

"Lily," Damon set them aside, turning to her.

"Damon," Lily frowned at him, crossing her arms. "I have to know."

"Even if I knew, I couldn't tell you," he explained. He reached to her face, brushing the stray tear away.

"I thought the hurt had stopped," Lily sniffled quietly, not making eye contact. She slid easily into his arms, resting her cheek on his shoulder. He circled her with his arms.

"I know," he brushed the top of her head with his lips. She tilted her chin, looking up at him.

"Damon, I have a hard time believing you know nothing," she challenged. Damon twitched slightly, moving to break the contact slightly. Lily bit her lip, pressing her finger tips against his spine slightly. She moved forward, pressing against him.

"We should probably go back to the living room," he choked out, prying himself from her grip. She let him go, watching as he stood. He offered her his hand, which she dropped her gaze as she put her hand in his. He scooped the postcards up, causing her to jerk her head up. "I will get to the bottom of this, Lily. I promise."

"Okay," she nodded once. He cupped her face in his hand delicately, studying her face with his eyes. He looked like he wanted to say something to her, like it pained him to keep his mouth shut and the words deep inside. He leaned forward, brushing his lips against hers gently. She sighed softly, her mouth parting. Damon growled, the sound muted, swallowed whole by Lily as he buried his hand in her hair roughly, tugging slightly as he pressed against her in the hallway. The postcards fluttered forgotten to the floor, falling among the discarded clothing, in a trail heading straight to Lily's master suite.


	11. Chapter Ten

**Disclaimer:** Standard disclaimer of use for fun.

* * *

**Chapter Ten**

Lily glanced up from her desk as the minister headed out of his office. He pulled up short, surprised to see Lily still bent over the polished wood. Before her were a large stack of scrolls and books of parchment. She looked tired, and she stifled a yawn.

"Lily, you're still here? I'd have thought that you'd have gone home hours ago," the minister's surprised tone echoing in the empty space.

"With Theron gone, there's no rush, and I have a lot of work to do," Lily gestured to the stacks. "I'll leave the things I need you to sign on your desk."

"That's fine, but don't stay too long," the minister urged. "You need to have your own life, you know. Outside of work."

"I won't be too much longer," Lily promised. The minister nodded and then swept out of the office. Lily remained sitting behind her desk until the lift gates closed, whisking the minister away in the car. Lily waited another moment before scooping up the scrolls and heading into the minister's office. She stood, blinking in the too bright artificial light. She glanced behind her shoulder before she rushed to the desk, dropping the scrolls in the basket for incoming. She immediately sat in the giant leather chair, tracing her fingers over the ornate metal work on the drawers.

She slipped her fingers into one of the looped knobs and pulled, the drawer slid open soundlessly. Inside were the typical items, sealing wax, bottles of ink, parchment with his type-head. Lily opened up and looked in each of the drawers, not sure what she was looking for exactly. She didn't see anything that would be considered interesting.

She stood and walked over the bookshelves, her eyes scanning the spines of ancient books. Nothing jumped out at her to reach for or touch. She frowned. She wasn't sure exactly what she expected to find in searching the minister's office, or what she should be even looking for. She sighed and crossed back through to the lobby area where her desk was. She jumped.

"Damon! What are you doing?" Lily asked as she spotted him standing over her desk. He seemed to be just as surprised.

"I thought you had already gone home," he confessed.

"Are you searching for something specific?" Lily accused, hands on her hip. He looked guilty, heat rushing to his cheeks as he looked at her.

"I was thinking about leaving you a note," he told her. Lily cocked her eyebrow up skeptically. "I didn't want to just disappear."

"Disappear?"

"Yeah, I have to leave," he explained.

"You don't owe me anything, Damon," Lily reminded him as she headed over to her desk. He came out from behind it, standing between the desk and her. He dropped his eyes, focusing on something other than her for a moment.

"You know, you didn't used to be so... flippant... about matters of the heart," Damon told her. He glanced up at her. "I hoped that I meant something more to you."

"You're a good friend," Lily suddenly felt incredibly uncomfortable with the direction of the conversation.

"Do you always take friends to bed?" Damon challenged. Lily narrowed her eyes, her hands dropping from her hips.

"I don't know what you expect of me, Damon," Lily admitted. "We've fallen together a few times. I certainly didn't ask you for any sort of commitment, and I know you surely remember my stance on the whole thing."

"Oh, Lily, I doubt anyone could forget your _stance_ on relationships," Damon leaned back against her desk slightly. There was something there under his words, this sarcastic tone that cut Lily to the quick. It was only by the grace of him looking away at that very moment that he missed the hurt reflect in Lily's eyes.

"You're being incredibly pigheaded, Damon," Lily mirrored back with that same biting tone. He looked up and nodded once.

"Well, now that I know where I stand," his tone was downright frosty. He turned, brushing past her and left. Lily couldn't explain the way the air seemed to be sucked out of the room, or the gaping hole that was there, just under the surface, threatening to open up. She took a deep breath, which sounded to her suspiciously like a shuddering gasp.

She walked to her desk, collapsing with a sob into the chair. She covered her face, trying to push the tears back into her eyes. She didn't understand it. She was fond of Damon, surely, but there wasn't more to it. Of the two times she'd gone to him, she'd been in a bad way, missing the intimate caress of her beloved Scorpius. She squeezed her eyes tight, trying to shut out the whisper of her inner voice.

'But... what about the kisses? Or the other time you turned to his arms?' Lily clenched her jaw, grinding her fists into her eye.

"Are you okay?" Albus asked, startling her into a whole-body jolt. She looked at him.

"Al? What are you doing here?" she accused. She closed her eyes for a second, her expression softening. "Sorry, I'm just very tired and I was getting ready to leave."

"You look like hell, have you rested lately?" he asked her.

"I've been busy, work and things," she dismissed with her hand as she leaned back for a second, closing her eyes and looking up at the ceiling.

"You know, you should take a holiday," Albus told her. His voice was firm, not harsh but insistent. Lily glanced at him, frowning.

"A holiday?" Lily parroted. She glanced at the calendar. Had Theron really been away already for three months? It seemed like yesterday that she'd seen him off on the train.

"You know, a little break from work," Albus laughed.

"I know what a holiday is, Albus Severus Potter," Lily chided. He laughed.

"You're breaking out the big name," he teased her.

"Would you prefer Albey?" Lily's voice was sickly sweet. His face contorted in mock horror.

"Oh, Merlin no! I thought that name died with my childhood!" he exclaimed. A half smile pulled on Lily's face.

"You can never escape your childhood nickname, Al," she reminded him. "Even if you want to." Albus shuddered slightly.

"Anyway, Lils, I think you should take a holiday," Albus continued. "Before the Christmas holiday, that way you can rest and recharge before TC comes home for Christmas." Lily looked at him, watching him. He looked uncomfortable standing there.

"Why?" Lily pressed.

"We might have had our little disagreement, but you and I? We're the only two left of our family, sans our children," Albus told her. "I worry about you."

"I worry more about you," Lily confessed.

"Don't worry about me, sis. I'm fine," Albus promised. Lily stood, hugging him. He was stiff, spine rod straight under her embrace before he melted a little and hugged her back.

"I miss you like crazy, Al," Lily told him. He chuckled.

"I miss you, too, sis," he admitted. "And Kate and I may have over reacted some. Tina and Sarah were just as guilty as TC was in the incident."

"I should have been home more," Lily added. He smiled at her as she stepped away.

"Water under the bridge, I hear that the kids are doing well, even if they are all in Slytherin together," Albus said with exaggerated distain. Lily laughed.

"That's what you get for being so against a Slytherin sleeping in your room," Lily reminded him. He grinned.

"Now I have two daughters in Slytherin," he sighed.

"Hey, us Slytherins aren't all bad," Lily smiled at him, winking. He nodded once.

"I know."

"Maybe I will think about taking a little holiday," Lily yawned. She headed back to her desk, sitting in the chair.

"I think you should," he told her. "Are you leaving now?"

"For holiday? Merlin no, I don't even know where I'd go," she confessed. He laughed, the first real whole body laugh.

"No, I meant from here, work," he clarified. Lily laughed with him.

"Oh, silly. Not quite yet. I have a few things left to do," Lily explained.

"Well, don't stay too long, and you should come for dinner soon," Albus offered. "I know Kate's been a mess since that outburst. I know she misses having you around as a friend."

"I miss her, too," Lily confessed. "I really do."

"Well, I'm going to be off," he told her as he turned and started toward the Auror portal. He stopped just outside of the portal, glancing back. "Thanks for helping out with Tina's stuff."

"My pleasure," Lily breathed softly as he disappeared. She stared at the shimmery portal as it faded and melted away. She sighed and began to clear the things from the top of her desk. She opened her top drawer and stopped. She dropped her papers back on her desk and yanked out the post card from the top drawer. She held the card in her hand, a red and white lighthouse on a rocky island, the words 'Ushuaia, Argentina' printed in bright letters.

Lily took a deep breath, readying for whatever words would be written in that always painfully familiar handwriting. She slowly turned the card over, dread piling up. She stared at the back of the card. She released the breath she was holding in a shuddering, stuttering staccato. It was blank.

She sat there for several minutes, staring at the blank card. There was only one time in her entire life that she had ever gotten blank post cards, ions ago, when she and Scorpius were separated, when he graduated Hogwarts and she'd pushed him from her life, forcing him to travel. She frowned slightly. It wasn't Scorpius who had sent them as they traveled, rather it had been Damon who had sent the post cards. Always blank. She had never asked why they were blank. Now she stared at this blank card.

Jumping up, she grabbed her bag and the card, heading to the lift. The ride down was the longest ride she'd taken in a long time, even with it being shorter than usual without all the added people. She sprinted to the nearest jumping off point and flushed herself back to the apparation station near her home. She ran down the empty sidewalk, the lights casting shadows in the dark. She made record time, skipping her building's lift and running the four floors. She headed straight to Damon's apartment, ignoring the hour and started pounding on the door.

"Damon! Damon!" she yelled through the door. "Open the door!"

"Hey, what's the meaning of this?" snapped a woman as she jerked opened the door. She was tying a belt around her small waist. She was older, in her sixties or seventies, with that same tanned skin. Her brown hair was streaked with regal stripes of gray.

"I need to speak with Damon," Lily gasped, still clutching the post card in her hand.

"My son isn't here," the woman told Lily sternly. "He's gone."

"Gone? I just talked to him. I just saw him an hour ago!" Lily challenged.

"He must have run into you on his way out of town," Mrs. West explained.

"Do you know when he's getting back?" Lily asked. The woman shook her head.

"He didn't say, I didn't ask. He just asked me to move in to watch his apartment and to take care of his house plants," Mrs. West told Lily. "It's late, and I'm tired."

The door was closed before Lily could protest or ask any more questions. Defeated, Lily made her way home, tapping the lock with her wand. She dropped her bag on the front hall table and headed straight to her room, dressing in her favorite old tee shirt and shorts. She climbed into bed, holding the post card. She turned it over and over in her hand, not really looking at it.

She fell asleep, gripping the card and thinking how she was really starting to dislike this South American country that seemed hell bent on taking everyone she loved away from her. Her last thoughts were startling, even to her. Somewhere in all these months of being back and being with Damon, somewhere in all that, somehow, she had begun to love him.


	12. Chapter Eleven

**Disc.:** Standard disclaimer about borrowed world.

* * *

**Chapter Eleven**

Lily leaned back in her seat, belt buckled. Her tray table was in the upright and locked position. She could feel the dip of the plane on hr last flight. She still had a long ride on the bus from the capital, but at least she'd be on terra firma again. She sighed, looking out the window as they descended.

It wasn't how she had wanted to travel to South America. She had planned to take a portkey. She wouldn't have had to spend the last day here and there, running from plane to plane. What should have been a simple form to fill out with the Department of Magical Travel turned into her quitting the ministry in haste.

_Lily walked up to the wizard behind the desk, smiling. He returned her smile and asked her how he could help her. She asked him for the portkey request form. She shuffled to the side, quill in hand, and began to fill out the various lines: location, length of sojourn, purpose of travel. Once she'd completed it, she queued back up to submit it with the small processing fee, the coins jingling in her pants pocket._

_"Ms. Potter?" the wizard called her name as he looked at her form. "I'm going to have to have you speak with someone from the department."_

_"Okay," she replied with a shrug. She didn't think anything of it. She followed him through a series of doors, until he came to a blank wall. He pulled out his wand and drew a small circle on the wall. A door knob appeared, and he turned it, the door swinging open. _

_"Come with me, Ms. Potter," he urged as he entered. Lily followed him out of the hallway and into the cramped office. Behind the desk was a squat witch with barely any hair. She gestured to the chair and dismissed the wizard. Lily sat in the chair._

_"Ms. Potter, I see you are applying for a portkey to Argentina," the woman immediately started, not introducing herself. Lily looked at the name on the brass placard: Anya Bertrand, Head of Department of Mysteries._

_"Mrs. Bertrand, why am I in your office?" Lily inquired._

_"I'm investigating your request," the woman told Lily, a strained smile on her too wrinkly face. There was a coldness, a hardness, to her ice blue eyes as she looked at Lily._

_"My request to go on holiday?" Lily asked._

_"Indeed, holiday you say? Such a strange place for a single woman of your stature to go," Mrs. Bertrand's quill jotted notes on Lily's application folder. Lily hadn't even been aware there would be a file, she'd never applied for a portkey before._

_"I hear it's lovely this time of the year," Lily lied._

_"I believe it's still snowing there," Mrs. Bertrand challenged. Lily looked surprised. She had thought that with it being South America, it'd be warm._

_"Well, there is the resort there," Lily dismissed. That much would probably be true, she hoped. _

_"Indeed," Mrs. Bertrand replied, looking over the folder. "Your father and brother were employees of the ministry, killed."_

_"Yes," Lily frowned. _

_"You have an eleven year old son that is Slytherin house, Hogwarts, for his education, correct?" Mrs. Bertrand continued on without looking up. _

_"Yes, but I don't understand what this has to do with my request for a portkey," Lily interrupted. If Mrs. Bertrand heard her, she made no indication._

_"You're the Minister's assistant, going on nine months now, correct?" _

_"Mrs. Bertrand, I don't see what this has to do with my holiday travel request," Lily snapped. Mrs. Bertrand looked up finally. She took her little glasses off and placed them on the desk._

_"No employee is permitted portkey travel to hostile locations," she told Lily simply._

_"Hostile locations?" Lily asked._

_"Hostile," Mrs. Bertrand said with a nod. "I'm going to have to deny your portkey application and strongly suggest you travel to somewhere nice, like Iceland if you're wanting to go for the climate."_

_"But Mrs. Bertrand," Lily countered._

_"It's final. Only the minister himself could lift the travel embargo," she told Lily. _

The jolt from the landing bounced Lily inches up out of her seat, just to be yanked back down by the seat belt. Lily grunted, ready to be free of the plane. It seemed to be painfully slow as it taxied to the gate and she nervously tapped her foot, waiting for the seat belt sign to turn off. The man next to her seemed just as eager to get off the plane, but Lily suspected he was feeding off her nervous energy.

It seemed like forever before the plane came to a standstill and the pilot came over the intercom, speaking first in Spanish, then in a heavily accented English. Lily wasn't sure what he was supposed to be saying, something about the weather. Lily was wearing long sleeves. It had been cool when she left London, hot as sin in Santiago, Chile when she transferred planes, and she suspected cool and damp in Ushuaia, Argentina.

She had stopped off at a muggle library, to do a little research and to find a local travel agent. The well dressed woman seemed really sympathetic to Lily's story that she needed a little pre-holiday, and booked her a flight out for that very afternoon. Lily had arrived with her roll-on suitcase and carry-on, passport tucked in her over-sized purse.

The ministry might have denied her travel through portkey from London to Ushuaia, but that didn't mean that Lily had to take the decision as her final answer. She gathered her carry-on, standing sandwiched between other patrons as they made their way from the plane. Lily thought of her final actions at the ministry with a touch of embarrassment and doubt.

_Lily snatched the paper from Mrs. Bertrand, certain that she would just march up to the minister and he'd sign off on her getting the portkey. Lily stormed out of the Department of Magical Travel, heading straight to the lift. She was grateful for once that her stop took precedence over all others and she didn't have to wait long until the gilded gates slid open, allowing her access to her office._

_She didn't pause at her desk, a__nd instead she walked straight through the barrier, already braced to the light. She didn't stop short though her body did jerk slightly to see both Obadiah Parker, Minister of Magic, and Draco Malfoy, Head of the Department of Auror Affairs in what could possibly have been a heated argument. They came to an abrupt silence, both looking at Lily standing there._

_"Lily, this isn't a good time," the minister told her._

_"I won't be but a second," Lily told him, crossing the room and placing the parchment on the desk before him. "Just need a signature, and then I'll be on my way."_

_"No," the minister told her quietly after he skimmed the document._

_"I'm slated for holiday," Lily reminded him._

_"And that's fine, but I will not sign off on a portkey for you. Not to Argentina," the minister told her as he glanced at Draco._

_"I don't see why not," Lily demanded. "I do everything that is asked of me. I want to go on one little holiday, to travel and see sights that I didn't when I was in my youth, and you're denying me?"_

_"My policy," the minister replied quietly. Lily frowned at Draco._

_"This is your doing, isn't it?" Lily accused, turning toward Draco with her hands on her hips._

_"My doing? The minister makes his own travel embargos," Draco explained._

_"It's true, I make my own embargos," the minister admitted. "As long as you're an employee of the ministry, you will not be allowed a portkey to South America."_

_"I quit!" Lily yelled at them both. They both looked startled. "Now, sign the paper."_

_"You don't surely mean to quit because I won't sign off," the minister retorted, anger rising in his voice. He looked at Draco for support. _

_"I mean it, Minister Parker," Lily replied coolly. "I quit. I'm done."_

_"He's still not going to sign off on this," Draco challenged her, frowning. "Maybe you should re-think your stance on your hastily quit position."_

_"You know what, Draco? You and the minister both can take this whole ministry and shove it up your-"_

_"Lily!" Draco cut her off, clamping his hand over her mouth. _

_"Ms. Potter, your resignation is accepted as of this very moment," Minister Parker snapped. "Draco, have security see her out."_

_"I'll see her out myself," Draco promised. "Save face for all parties, as it were." Lily growled something under Draco's hand, struggling to break free as he pulled her from the room. Draco didn't take her straight to the lift, as she expected, still struggling and still kicking. For an older man, Draco was surprisingly fit and strong._

_He walked as if she weren't fighting him, through the now shimmery portal that led out of the minister's antechamber. Lily continued to fight, though with less exuberance. He pulled her along an icy corridor that caused her to shiver before coming out in the back hallway of the Department of Auror Affairs. He entered the first door, an interrogation room, and dropped her on her rear end in the chair._

_"I don't know what's got into you, Lily, but you're acting rather irresponsible and childish," Draco told her. He sighed. "Your actions, unfortunately warrant further investigation."_

_"Investigation?" Lily growled at him. "For what? I want to go on Holiday, not commit a crime. I have rights."_

_"Not here, you don't," Draco told her remorsefully. "You'll have to be investigated. I'll have someone come do your initial interview, then I'll personally take you home."_

_"I'm not going to be allowed to leave on holiday, am I?" Lily asked as Draco headed to the door._

_"No," he told her with a sigh as he exited, leaving Lily alone in the room._

Lily smiled at the customs agent that stamped her passport. She thought it was a stroke of good luck that she and Theron had both gotten them to return to London after a long stint of living in Paris. It had served her well. She hailed a taxi easily, the man behind the wheel knowing exactly where the resort was without any direction from Lily.

She looked out the windows as the cab driver drove through the streets. He was talking a mile a minute in broken English, most of which Lily didn't understand, but she'd smile or nod appropriately. She loved the look of the older buildings, the rows of shops and homes, with alley ways draped with lines of laundry stretched between buildings.

"Wait! Is that a hostel?" Lily called out from the back of the cab. The startled taxi driver slammed on his breaks.

"Si, senorita! Es muy bueno!" he tossed back at her, gesturing at the original architecture.

"Do you think they'd have openings?" Lily asked leaning forward to talk to him. She had reservations at the five-star resort, but something about this almost quaint bed and breakfast hostel called to her.

"Claro que si, senorita. I can check," he offered, jerking the car out of the roadway and parking in front of the garden arches.

"Do you mind?" Lily asked. He shook his head.

"No hay problema," he grinned and got out of the cab. He opened her door and retrieved her luggage. Frowning only when she held the gate and doors open for him, respectively. A woman stood behind a small counter, her glossy brown hair long enough to make for a thick braid.

"Buenas tardes, Agosto," she offered the man. He blushed slightly.

"Senorita Gomes," he murmured with a slight bow of his head. He begun to speak rapid Spanish to the woman, gesturing to Lily while still holding her luggage. Lily stepped back once to avoid getting swiped by her carry-on case.

"A room, no?" Senorita Gomes asked Lily with a smile. Lily nodded.

"Please?" Lily replied. All those years of French had served her well when she had lived in Paris with Theron, but did her a lick of good in a country that spoke Spanish.

"I have one," the woman said with a thick accent, grabbing the key from the peg-box. "Sr Agosto, le llevará el equipaje de esta manera a la sala?"

"Si, senorita Gomes," he said with another bow. Lily followed the woman, the cab driver behind her, up to the second floor where there were six doors, each one marked with a number. The owner unlocked the door to number four, swinging it open and gesturing for Lily to enter the spacious room.

"The communal bath is down the hall," she said to Lily. "Very common here for one bath per floor."

"Okay," replied as she looked around the very comfortable room. The bed looked plush, and she could picture coming here with a lover. She blushed as the thought crossed her mind, assaulted by the distant images of both Damon and Scorpius, as if they begged for her to choose.

The cab driver placed the luggage by the edge of the bed. He grinned at Senorita Gomes and bowed his head again. Lily quickly fished around her bag, pulling free some pesos to pay him. He returned a few to her, mumbling something about too many and left, leaving Lily alone with the house-mistress. The woman studied Lily.

"You need something in you," she said and Lily's mind thought of the last time she was with Damon, her face blushing crimson. "Comida... er, food?"

"Oh," Lily blushed harder. "Yes, si, thank you."

"Come down to the cocina in a few," the woman told her. Lily nodded. Senorita Gomes left, leaving Lily alone in the room to unpack her bags. She looked to the phone by her beside and she fished the scrap of paper that had the address and telephone number for the resort written on it. After a few moments, and a fee of one night, Lily was able to break her reservations. She headed downstairs, finding the kitchen easily and sitting at the table.

"I know what you are," the woman told her as she placed a sandwich before Lily. Her English was clearer than it had been when the cab driver had been there, though it was still punctuated with the accent of the locals.

"Excuse me?" Lily choked.

"I have had many of your kind cross my threshold," Senorita Gomes explained to Lily. "I have written your ministry, forbidding any more of their operatives staying here."

"I'm no operative," Lily calmly replied as she picked up the sandwich. The woman laughed.

"Oh, that I know," she said. "Your light is white."

"My light?"

"I can read energies," Senorita Gomes dismissed. "My mother and abuela were both seers. I'm squib, myself, with just a touch of sensitivity. Your energy is pure, white. Good and honest."

"I'm not always honest," Lily confessed. The woman raised her eyebrow. "I was forbidden by the ministry to come here."

"That was probably for your own good," the woman replied darkly. "This place has a way about taking a soul and twisting it until it breaks."

"I had to come," Lily choked out. "This is the place that all of my family has had connections to that have left this world."

"If that's true, then it's possible that it could take you, too," the woman warned.

"I have to know the truth," Lily dropped her eyes. "Whatever it is, I have to know. It's been a long time coming."

"You need to be careful. There are trolls in the mountains, thus the haze that seems to hang over the city," the woman told Lily. "They rarely come down, but they do seem to have some sort of agreement with the local vampiros... uh... vampires. They're the ones you should avoid at all cost."

"Funny, I believe that's exactly where I need to start my search," Lily murmured once Senorita Gomes was out of ear-shot. She finished the sandwich, placing the plate in the sink. Lily went upstairs, grabbing her jacket and her cross-body purse. She headed back out the front door, closing it quietly behind her.

She stood outside, uncertain exactly where to start. It wasn't like there were going to be any giant neon signs that would advertise a place to look. She squeezed her purse, the slight piece of wood a comfort under her fingers. There were some upsides to having such a small wand. She had been able to tuck it into the spiral twists of her notebook and claim it was a pencil.

_Shale had walked into the interrogation room, and his first action was to take her wand from her. It was protocol, he had claimed, and he looked really uncomfortable doing so to his childhood friend. He had placed it just out of her reach, on a shelf by the door before he sat down across from her._

_"Hello, Shale," she murmured quietly. "I see that it's you that has to do whatever it is the DAA has asked."_

_"I just need to get some information," he was no-nonsense, immediately opening a thick file that Lily hadn't seen prior. She tried to read some of it upside down, but the pages were blank from her point of view and she suspected it was an enchantment._

_"I honestly don't know what you hope to learn," Lily sighed. He glanced up at her, and she swore he looked sorry for her. The pity was there, just under the reflection of the almost too bright light of the room._

_"You recently applied for a portkey," his voice was clipped, official._

_"Yeah, like an hour or so ago," Lily laughed bitterly._

_"Where did you apply for the key?"_

_"Um, the department of Magical Travels," Lily rolled her eyes and Shale glanced up. She bit back the 'duh' that almost escaped._

_"I'm sorry, I wasn't more precise in my question," Shale replied though for a second, the corner of his mouth twitched as if he might smile. Lily glanced around the room, suddenly wondering if they might be under observation. She looked behind him where the mirror was. She'd seen enough police dramas to know it was probably a two-way mirror._

_"I knew what you meant," Lily replied. He looked back down at the file._

_"When you applied for your portkey, where did you list for your destination," Shale asked._

_"Argentina," Lily told him. Shale glanced up, surprise evident on his face._

_"And what is your purpose for going to Argentina?" Shale asked her._

_"Holiday," Lily answered._

_"Did anyone tell you to go there for holiday?" he asked._

_"No, no one told me to go there," Lily was truthful. No one had mentioned Argentina to her._

_"I see from your file that you have a brother who works for this office, is that true?" Shale asked._

_"You know he does, Shale," Lily scoffed. "You also know that my other brother and father were Aurors before they died, and that I was engaged to Scorpius, who was an Auror."_

_"Lily, please, I'm following protocol questions," Shale implored, looking at her intently._

_"How's Nina?" Lily asked. Shale sat back. Lily knew Nina was likely a sore subject for Shale, since their marriage had crumbled and failed._

_"This isn't about me," Shale retorted stiffly. _

_"This isn't about me, either, Shale," Lily prodded. "This is about some information that the department seems to think I have, that I don't. I just want to go on holiday. I need a break. I'm alone."_

_"I need to get back to the questions," Shale prompted after looking at her intently for a moment. "Are you acquainted with Damon West?"_

_"Damon is my neighbor," Lily said simply._

_"Have you had any interaction with Mr. West as of lately," Shale questioned._

_"I've taken notes at meetings that he's had with the Minister of Magic," Lily explained._

_"What about interactions on a non-official basis?" Shale asked. Lily squirmed slight, unable to keep the slight blush from creeping up._

_"We've had dinner," Lily explained._

_"What about sex?" Shale choked out. Lily felt as if her face was on fire._

_"If you're asking me, or trying to get to the point of, did Damon tell me anything that would lead to my wanting to go to Argentina, then the answer is no. He has never once mentioned to me Argentina," Lily replied hotly, anger dripping from her words._

_"Ms. Potter, answer the question, please," Shale ordered. There was a sharp edge to his voice, a strain as if he was beyond ready to end questioning._

_"Yes," Lily hissed at him, gripping the table as she leaned forward. "Two times and it was GREAT." Shale looked a little pale._

_"And during these... interactions... did he ever divulge any information about what he does or secrets of the ministry or this department?" Shale's words were clipped, stiff. For as uncomfortable as she was, Lily realized that this line of questioning was probably making him even more uncomfortable. She wondered who else was witnessing from behind the glass, if they too were uncomfortable, and she decided she didn't care anymore. She sat back a second and smiled._

_"No, his mouth too busy to share secrets," she said coolly, a smirk on her face. Shale's head snapped up to look at her and his mouth hung open in surprise. Lily was studying a hangnail on her pinky finger, but she noticed._

Lily grinned as she made her way down the sidewalks, passing the pubs and small night clubs that seemed to spill light and music out on the sidewalk. People smiled as they passed her and Lily headed into one of the pubs. She supposed she could have used a divining charm, to use her wand to find under-ground clubs or magical places, but she worried that the ministry would be able to locate her that way. She didn't know if they put a magical tracer on her wand, so she wasn't going to risk it so early on, though she wasn't stupid. She knew that she was in the very city they'd start looking for her. She'd stick out like a sore thumb, but she'd deal with that when it became an issue.

Lily pushed her way to the bar, a few people glancing her way as she pushed through the throngs of people crammed into the tiny space. A few smiled at her but no one said anything over the loud music as she made it to the well worn bar. The bartender approached, rag in his hand. He was that sweet caramel coloring, his eyes light, and his muscles broad. Lily couldn't help but grin at this god on Earth.

"What'll you have?" he shouted with a smile. His accent was faint, as if he'd been a long since transplanted soul from another region.

"I don't know," Lily called over the din. "What do you recommend?" He gestured for her to lean closer, her elbow leaning against the bar. His mouth was near her ear.

"You look like a Fire Whisky kinda gal," he whispered just loud enough that she could hear him. She tripped backwards, bumping roughly into a big brute of a guy, whose hands clamped down sharply on her arms.

"Easy, sweetheart," the brute whispered in her ear as he steered her toward the door to the right of the bar. "We just want to talk."

Lily thought to scream, but the thought came too late as she passed through the swinging doors. Her ears rung in the silence, the dark hallway swallowing up almost all of the light. For as loud as the bar had been, it was a shock to her senses as she was steered in silence towards the one lone door at the end of the hallway.


	13. Chapter Twelve Point Two

**A/N:** I know I've not done an author's note in some time, and if I had only written this chapter once, I wouldn't have... but I wrote two different (oh so very) different versions of chapter twelve. Of the two, this is the one I'm going with. There is a bit of the other version in this chapter, but they as a whole had two very different feelings to them. Anyways, this one is appropriately called 12.2

**Disc.**: Borrowed world, characters... plot is mine.

* * *

**Chapter Twelve Point Two**

Lily felt like she had been walking around for days, her feet ached and she sat down on a bench near the wharf, removing one of her slip-on sneakers and rubbing her foot through her sock. The damp air had made for her hair to be a wild mess, and it was misting just enough to see it swirling in the rain. She was beginning to doubt her reasoning for coming to Ushuaia.

For one, it had been a week and she felt like she was no closer to finding Damon, who she suspect had to be in the area. After all, how big could Argentina really be? For another, she didn't even know where to look to find information about Scorpius. She was starting to lose hope that this trip hadn't been a complete waste of her time.

She had to admit, the museums were awesome. She had visited quite a few of them, wandered them aimlessly for hours longer than she would have been able to if she had brought Theron with her. She was able to really enjoy without feeling rushed. She had taken a tour around the city on a blue double-deck bus, twice. The first time she was mesmerized by all the small town had to offer, and the second time was to make sure she didn't miss anything.

The steep cobbled roads were in disrepair in some places, and she'd fallen once, skinning her hands, but a few of the locals helped her up without so much as a giggled, concern on their faces. There was the language barrier, but she was finding her way around without much problem. The Spanish-to-English phrase book had come in handy, even if she butchered the pronunciations.

Senorita Gomes introduced Lily to her mother, Senora Gomes and her mother's mother, Abuela. Both women spoke pretty good English and Lily was able to converse with them about the town and the history. Lily shared a little about herself, about her son. After dinner out on the town, Lily would join the other guests on the portico for cafe and bread. Several were honeymooners, but for the most part they were single tourists visiting the last city at the end of the world.

Lily slipped her sneaker on and walked over to the railing, ignoring the darkness that was falling around her, or the gas lamps that were being lit by a man with a long flaming stick. Instead, she focused on the ship slowly sliding through the water. It was one of the few non-windy days, wet but not windy, and Lily could see the tiny wakes behind the giant boat. She had plans to see about a day cruise, to go see penguins. She leaned against the metal railing and watched for a moment.

The hairs on the back of her neck prickled slightly. Not thinking of it, she rubbed the back of her neck and continued to watch the black-bottomed barge as it slid by. The prickling feeling reappeared, more intensely now with the hair on her arms standing up under the sleeves of her jacket. She shuddered slightly, the feeling of someone watching her. She turned slowly, her back now to the barge and looked to the far side of the street, her eyes searching the dark shadows in vain.

"Hello?" She called out loudly. The wharf was sparsely populated and only the person closest to her glanced up and her way. Lily dismissed him immediately, the old bent body covered in a hooded coat, leaning heavily on a cane. She kept looking to the darkness of the shadows, her eyes straining to see more than she could. She took a slight step forward, the spans of grass and gravel, a roped off statue of some Darwin guy, and cobbled streets lay between Lily and the shadow of the alley.

She turned to look back at the barge when she saw a spark of something, perhaps a match to light a cigarette flare up slightly, and the red hot glow of the business end of the cigarette. In that momentary flash of fire, even as small as it seemed, Lily swore she saw the aged but ever familiar face of Scorpius. She didn't bother calling out again, and instead she took off toward the shadows, running through the grass and gravel, sliding under the roped off statue.

She could hear something moving behind her, something quick but not nearly as winded as she was. She closed in on the alley way, stopping short as she stood just outside of the shadow, staring deeply as if it could help her see further into the darkness. She had been so certain she saw someone there, she glanced around trying to see around the metal bins that lined the alley in several places. She sighed, believing that her mind had been playing tricks on her. She glanced down as her foot hit something. A lit cigarette rolled into a shallow puddle, but for a moment Lily saw that it glowed red hot and lit. She had seen someone, and she wondered if it was possible that it had been Scorpius.

"Lily," she heard her name whispered in the dark, a sigh of wind and her head jerked to the darkened ally. She moved her body, positioning it as if she were going to find its source when a hand clamped down on her arm. She looked up to see that same guy from the pub, the one who had directed her into the hallway with the door at the end of it.

"What did Raul say?" he asked in that same almost too deep voice that seemed to physically crawled on to Lily. She shivered.

"He said to stay in the light," Lily murmured, rolling her eyes.

_She had hesitated but that brute of a guy was there behind her, propelling her down the too silent hallway until they came to the door. Lily didn't know what to do, to make a break for it or die trying, or to head forward. She knew her wand was there, in her purse, but she didn't want to make a move for it. Plus, with the enlarging spell on her purse, she knew it might take a few minutes to find it when seconds might count._

_She needn't worry about making a decision. Instead, the man pushed her forward, holding the door open. Lily prided herself on her steel spine, but she couldn't help but feel ill at ease with the man who sat behind the shiny wood desk. He frowned when she walked in, his eyes examining her from where he sat. Lily had the strangest urge to try and hide away from his eyes._

_"I was very clear with your ministry that I wouldn't tolerate them sending in operatives without my prior approval," he said, his voice gentle._

_"Operatives?" Lily asked. The man frowned deeper, his eyes narrowing slightly._

_"You're an employee of the ministry, are you not?" he asked. Lily hesitated._

_"Not anymore," she told him."I quit, because they wouldn't approve my portkey here. I just wanted to go on holiday."_

_"Every creature, every witch and wizard, that cross into my country has to be approved," he told her, rising. He circled the desk and sat on the edge. He was well dressed for whatever he was, though Lily suspected he wasn't muggle in any form. _

_"I didn't know. I just got here," she promised. Her voice hitched up some._

_"I'm Raul Rosa, the Minister of Magic in these parts," he explained. "Not nearly as big and magically populated as your region, but I still prefer to not have any old witch or wizard popping in unannounced. Especially after last time."_

_"Last time?"_

_"Last time, there was a war," he murmured quietly. He stroked his goatee for a moment, deep in thought before he looked back at her. "I shall allow you to holiday with one stipulation. Stay in the light."_

_"The light?" Lily asked. She expected him to explain or expand on it more, but he didn't. He only nodded once and waved his hand dismissively. Diego, the brute, gently took her arm and steered her back down the hall, back into the din of pub-goers. _

_"Stay in the light," Diego whispered as he released her and disappeared into the masses._

Lily frowned as Diego insisted on walking her home. He hadn't wanted to hear what she had to say about possibly seeing someone she knew. He just muttered stuff under his breath in Spanish and she wondered if he was cursing at her. She was getting rather sick of the bureaucracy.

"You know, Diego? I can walk home just fine," Lily told him. "I've been a grown up for some time."

"Hm," Diego grunted.

"Can I ask you a question?" Lily asked as she walked beside him. He grunted again, shuffling beside her. She took it as an invitation to ask. "What happened with the war thing?"

"No going to talk about it," he told her. He glanced at her, who had stopped.

"I don't feel like going back to my room," Lily shrugged slightly. She took a seat on a bench. Diego looked aggravated.

"Senorita Potter, please," he sighed. "I have a family I'd like to get back to."

"I'm not stopping you," Lily gestured. He stood there. "Look, I get that I'm not wanted here. I just want a peaceful holiday. I'll be gone before you know it and you can go back to whatever it is you do for the ministry."

"I'm an Auror," he told her.

"Of course you are," Lily shook her head. "Everyone's an Auror."

"Not everyone," he raise his eyebrow at her.

"Not me," she laughed. He pulled a flask out of his jacket and took a sip, recapping it before hiding it away. "Not much for sharing?"

"Er, no," he told her. "Fire whiskey."

"Ah," Lily frowned.

"I have a drinking problem," he explained.

"Ah," she replied.

"Plus, you don't exactly look like the Fire Whiskey type," he told her quietly. Lily glanced up at him for a second.

"You know, for an Argentinean, you have the strangest accent," Lily murmured. If she expected him to respond, she was left wanting. He just stood there, arms crossed against his broad chest. She sighed and rose. "Guess I'll go home."

"Back to London?" he asked almost hopefully. Lily frowned.

"To the hostel," she corrected. An expression crossed his face, one that Lily couldn't place. He looked almost saddened by the fact.

"Oh," he grunted after a second. Lily started off down the street. He followed behind her, a few feet behind. They were still a few blocks from the bed and breakfast, darkness sliding over them quickly.

"You can walk next to me," Lily told him. He quickened his step. Lightening cracked across the sky, the rain beginning to fall. Lily readied to run down the sidewalk when she heard a sound, quiet but still somehow demanding her attention. She turned and looked to the alley way.

"We need to go," Diego said stiffly.

She heard a low moan and despite her desire to run, she felt herself compelled to move toward it, deeper in the ally. She tripped over a pair of legs, crashing loudly into wet trash bins. The owner of the legs grunted and groaned. She couldn't see who it was in the shadows, and decided it might be worth the risk of taking her wand out to light. She dug around in her bag, pulling the small piece of wood out.

"Lumos," she whispered, casting a light from the tip of her wand.

"Lily, no," Damon groaned as something rushed her from the side, sending the wand flying off and landing in a shallow puddle of water. Lily's head slammed against the cobbles. She screamed, wondering where Diego was during this. She could hear fighting, shouting and the sick sounds of fists to bodies, but she didn't know who was fighting who. The alley was suddenly unnaturally dark.

The heavy weight of a large man crushed down on Lily, the stench of sweat and death filling Lily's nose and threatening to smother her. Lily tried to wiggle out from under him, a gritty, dirty clawed hand covering her entire face and jerking it to the side. She built up a scream only for it to be lost in the crushing pressure of his wrist on her throat. Her heart was racing as the fabric of her shirt and jacket were ripped from her body.

Lily felt the hot breath on the parts of her cheek that were still exposed, the pressure gone from her throat. She shuddered under his weight and the flick of his too rough tongue. His teeth sank in, Lily jerking at the last minute, causing his teeth to tear into the flesh of her shoulder instead of the base of her throat. The pain was blinding, bile bubbling up from her stomach and oozing out around his hand. She could hear the gulping sound, as if he was drinking deeply from a pint rather than slurping greedily on her.

_'I can't die. Not here_,' she thought. She closed her eyes, thinking of where her wand might be. She could feel it's energy vibrating near her, away but close enough to call with magic. 'Accio _wand'_ She felt the smooth wood slap her hand hard, with such power and finality that she knew she still had fight left in her. She knew lots of healing spells and healing potions, but not much in the way of defense. Still, she closed her eyes against the assault and thought of injuring whatever it was on her. The tip of her wand, still lit bright white from her previous spell, burned red hot and she drew it up under him. It caught his clothes on fire.

The unearthly scream the man made as he scrambled away, the smell of burning flesh, and the light-headed feeling from loss of blood had Lily turning over in the rain to vomit. The rain continued to pour down, washing away the vomit and blood as quickly as it hit the cobblestone alley.

_"Nox,"_ Lily whispered, the light extinguishing from her wand. She stored it back in her bag for safe keeping and then crawled slowly to Damon. He was still, unmoving. She couldn't see him in the dark, but she easily found his shoes and slid her hands up his leg, waist, and torso until her hands were on either sides of his neck. She could feel the sticky wetness, thicker than water, oozing from a gaping tear in his throat.

"Lily, are you okay? You need to go!" Diego yelled at her, his face inches from hers. In the flashes of lightening, she could see that he was pretty bad off, bruising already blossoming on his face.

"No, I'm not leaving him," Lily snarled at him. "Damon is my friend. My lover." Diego fell back on his heels, shock twisting and under that, an unexplained twist of rage. Lily turned away from the almost hurt look on Diego's face and instead focused on Damon.

Lily scrambled to pull her wand out. She pointed it at Damon. She closed her eyes for a second, imagining the wound she'd felt. She ran her hands over him, finding two more bad wounds on him. He gasped as her fingers probed the wounds. She opened her eyes, trying to make him out in the dark, wiping her eyes and smearing blood across her face as she did so. Her right shoulder was useless, the meat and tendons torn. She was lucky she was left handed.

"Ferula, ferula, ferula," Lily whispered as she waved her wand at Damon, imagining exactly which of the bandages and ointments would best serve Damon's wounds. He moaned slightly, hissing as the wounds were covered. She crawled over to him. "Damon? Can you stand?"

"I don't know," he moaned softly.

"I need you to try," she whispered. She turned to Diego. "Help me, if you can."

"He's from the London Ministry," Diego explained. "I'm not supposed to get involved."

"Help me, please, Diego," Lily begged, grabbing Diego's hand hard. "Please. He's all I have left, other than my son." Diego hesitated and Lily pulled away, sliding her arm under Damon's arms.

"You're bleeding," he told her as she struggled to help him to his feet. She gasped when his fingers touched the ragged wound on her shoulder. Diego rushed to Damon's other side, taking on more of the weight.

"I'll be fine," she told him through gritted teeth.

"I can't go back to my place," Damon groaned as they shuffled forward at a painfully slow pace the way Lily had originally come. "It was raided."

"Maybe he should go to a hospital," Lily suggested. Diego shook his head.

"No, no hospitals," Diego told her. "He's not supposed to be here. He'll be executed."

"It's okay," Lily lied. She had her arm across his stomach, holding tight to her other wrist, his arm across her shoulders. She pictured a compass, with her room at the bed and breakfast at the top, in the position of 'due north'. She turned her wand over in her hand, letting it spin in a circle for a moment before it pointed the way she should go.

It was slow going, shuffling along with Damon limping along between the two of them, but before long the light of the porch came into view and Lily helped him up the steps, Senorita Gomes standing there with her eyes wide. Lily expected her to turn them away, but instead she swooped down, sliding her arm under Lily's, taking its place and guiding Damon into the kitchen. Her expression was guarded, but Lily had a feeling this wasn't the first time someone had shown up on her doorstep blooded and half dead.

"I was worried," Senorita Gomes whispered, throwing a look at Diego. Lily wondered why she was whispering but immediately saw why. Abuela, Senorita Gomes' mother's mother, entered, followed closely by Senora Gomes. The two women were serious, looking, their brown hair both streaked with every increasing stripes of silver and white. Senora Gomes cleared the long table quickly, her wand flickers barely visible as she set the house in motion. They barely glanced at Diego as they went to work.

Lily helped Senorita Gomes hoist Damon up on the table, his feet dangling off one side. Lily immediately set to work getting together the water to clean the wounds while Abuela seemed to start brewing something in a pot over the stove. Senorita Gomes whispered about laws against magic in the village, nodding towards the drawn shades and the use of ordinary things to make potions. She pointedly looked at Diego, and Lily frowned. Surely they must have known that Diego was a member of the ministry.

"You did good to staunch the bloods," Senora Gomes acknowledged as she and Lily went to work, removing the blood-caked scraps of clothes. Lily immediate went to work, cleaning up the dirt and blood from his face and body, trying not to look lower on him.

"Mami never praises anyone," Senorita Gomes whispered to Lily.

"Carla, no gossip," snapped Senora Gomes.

"Si, Mami," Senorita Gomes appeased. Damon remained unconscious on the table while the four women bathed him head to toe. They slathered thick ointments on his wounds, wrapping them with bright white bandages that stood out even more on his tan skin. Lily glanced at Diego, the man taking a long swig from his flask.

"Maria, un poco de ropa, por favor," Abuela croaked out in a voice that reminded Lily of rusty old hinges. Senora Gomes hurried away, and Lily caught Senorita Gomes glancing quickly at the small dish towel that barely seemed to keep him modest.

Once Damon was dressed, he was brought around slowly. He was weak, having lost a lot of blood, but when he was ready, they sat him in a chair at the table and Senorita Gomes fed him broth and potion. She would blush every time his fingers would touch hers as he tried to feed himself. Lily thought it was very curious, but she didn't focus much on it as Mami and Abuela went to work on her own wound. The superficial scrapes were washed and bandaged quickly, but the shoulder wound had been far greater damaged than she'd let on about.

Lily felt both Diego and Damon's eyes on her as they unbuttoned her shirt, her jacket already cast aside. The blood had stained her bra a deep red. She raised her eyes slowly to meet Diego's eyes, lust unhidden in his eyes as he looked at her. The only change from that unbridled lust was when he let his eyes map out the jagged tear in her shoulder. She glanced at Damon, who was frowning at the other man in the kitchen.

"This is very bad," Mami Gomes said. "Maybe worse than his, even."

"¿Puedes ayudarla?" Damon asked. He glanced away from the old woman to look at Diego before focusing back on Lily's wound.

"¡Claro que sí!" Abuela nodded at him.

"You speak Spanish? Since when?" Lily asked as she tried to ignore the way her body screamed as she touched her shoulder. She winced and could have sworn she saw Diego move forward a fraction.

"I always have," he explained. She cringed, unable to continue looking at him. Her eyes were clenched tightly and she felt his hands grip her hands. She twisted a second and a second set of hands clasped hers. They were big and manly, rough, and yet there was something distantly familiar.

"I didn't know," Lily gasped as a burning liquid was swabbed at the wound with a large cloth. Abuela went to work quickly, doing the worst for the best reasons, scrubbing the wound and coating the layers of meat, tendon, and flesh with a sickly smelling ointment before removing Lily's bra and cleaning her up. Lily kept her eyes closed tightly, but she could still hear the slight sigh of breath. The more she thought of Damon's eyes on her, sitting there on the table topless, the greater the conflict that warred within and the hotter her cheeks burned. Diego had dropped her hand and she wondered if he had stayed around for the main show. She felt the prickle of something, that same feeling of being watched but she couldn't bring herself to check if he was still in the room

Once she was fully bandaged, and a long cotton night gown pulled over her head, Lily felt strong enough to open her eyes and look at him. Diego was still there, leaning against the wall silently. His arms were crossed against his chest, but there was something there in his eyes. It was just below the rage that seemed to flash on the edges of his expression, his jaw clenched tight. Damon had reigned his desires back greatly so that he looked upon her with just an appropriate level of concern and interest. Lily sipped the same broth and stood, thankful for once she wasn't weak-kneed.

"I have no rooms left," Carla fretted.

"They will share," Mami shared, glancing at Diego. "Now go up and sleep, and only sleep, both of you."

"Yes ma'am," Lily and Damon both replied in unison.

"I'll be going," Diego was gruff. Lily stood and followed him out onto the porch. He rounded quickly, startling Lily a bit. "You know, they could be executed for helping him."

"Please, Diego," Lily begged. "Please don't say anything."

"I'm going to have to explain these wounds," he told her. "Bites are supposed to be reported."

"I read the books in school. I know that it takes more than a single bite," Lily bit her lip slightly, looking up at him. "So, that was an Argentinean Vampire, huh?"

"Yeah," he nodded once. Lily watched him sigh, running his hand through his hair. It was strangely reminiscent of something, long forgotten though Lily couldn't place it.

"I'm sorry that I got you mixed up in this," Lily apologized.

"Do you love him?" Diego's voice cracked. Lily shrugged.

"Maybe, possibly. I could see myself falling for him, eventually," Lily sighed softly. She focused on the floor of the portico. She looked up at Diego. "He was the best friend of the love of my life. I've known him forever."

"Oh," Diego grunted.

"Please don't bring anyone in to this, Diego," Lily begged grabbing his arm. Fire burned under her finger tips, which confused her. She wasn't even remotely attracted to the giant man standing before her. "If I have to, I'll take Damon and leave as soon as he's fit to travel. I don't want anyone to get in trouble, and I can't lose anyone else to this place."

Lily was in tears, gripping hard to his arm. Her breaths came in shudders as she begged him to keep his silence.

"I'll think about it," he told her, pulling free from her easily. "Just for the love of Merlin, Lils. Stay in the light."

In a flash, he was gone, apparated away. Lily stood on the porch a moment longer, something nagging her to her core. Something was wrong, she could feel it, but she couldn't put her finger on it. She turned and started back to the door, stopping only for a second when she felt the prickle of someone's eyes on her. Maybe, she had been stupid to come.

She returned to help Damon upstairs, reminded by the ladies that nothing more than sleep should go on while they shared a bed. Thoughts of alternative possibilities went out the door with each painfully, aching step up the flights of stairs. Lily opened the room, placing the wand beside the bed before she helped him under the covers. Without a word, she flipped off the light and climbed under there with him, only hesitating a second before she curled her body against him.

"I'm sorry I put it in your head to come, Lily," Damon apologized. "I'm sorry I allowed the ministry to do such a stupid recon mission, and not even tell you what you were risking and why. You're not even an Auror. If I had even suspected you would have gotten hurt like this, I would never have gone along with it all." Lily froze, contemplating what he just admitted to.

"So, those moments we shared? All a part of the master ministry scheme to get me here?" Lily said bitterly. "Was sleeping with me a bonus?"

"Actually, that got me in trouble. I was forbidden to do that, and well, I've kind of loved you since you just a kid. I told Scorpius countless times, especially when he was being particularly stupid about you, that if it wasn't for him I'd have pursued you," Damon confessed in a quiet whisper in the dark. "Had I had my way, once the appropriate time had passed, I would have firmly inserted myself into your and Theron's lives and been a father and husband. But the department forbade it."

"Why?" Lily asked, though she suspected she knew the truth.

"Scorpius," Damon replied simply. "He's forbidden it."

"He had or he has?" Lily pressed.

"He has," Damon confirmed softly in the dark.

"He's alive," Lily gasped quietly. She buried her face into his neck. Damon groaned softly. "This whole time, he's been alive?"

"Yes, Lily," Damon breathed softly, still holding tight to her. "He's alive."


	14. Chapter Thirteen

**A/N:** The tone of this whole chapter can basically be summed up with a single song. If you've never listened to the cover band, Boyce Avenue do their rendition of Somebody I Used to Know... you should. If this chapter had an anthem, this would be it. I'd link it from YouTube, but it's easier if you'd just look for it yourselves, if you so wish.

**Disc.:** Borrowed characters, own the plot.

* * *

**Chapter Thirteen**

Lily watched him sleep next to her. It was the first time that they'd slept together, like actually slept together and did nothing else. She knew she needed to wake him, but she wasn't ready to quite yet. Damon was peaceful, his face not tormented with the lies he must have been forced to tell in her presents. He looked younger sleeping, more at ease.

Her heart ached. She was falling for him, but the knowledge Damon offered her last night, that Scorpius was very much alive, it carved at that love, it carved at her heart. If he was truly alive, why hadn't he kept his promise? Why hadn't he come home and be with her and their son. She had needed him, their son had needed him. She was only able to survive the crushing blow of the deaths because she had no other option.

She had missed the funerals of her father and brother, being sedated in the hospital. They were buried in the graveyard at Godric's Hollow. She had visited only the one time, when she was first released from St. Mungo's. The same rang true for Scorpius' grave that had been erected in the Malfoy family plot. Just the one visit, and Lily never returned. She wondered how much more was faked, all in the name of the ministry. She looked at Damon, wondering if he'd tell her. He'd already told her more than she was permitted to know, and she knew that it would be the end of his career.

She lay next to him, her eyes tracing the contrasting bandages across his body. She reached out, her fingers brushing his skin softly. He shivered in his sleep but didn't stir. She closed her eyes for a moment, thinking. A flash of a false memory assaulted her senses, confusing her. She could imagine marrying Damon, having more children with him, and just finally putting it all behind her. She opened her eyes, staring at the ceiling as a tear slipped from her eye. She would never be able to marry Damon, and the only child she had would be it for her, her body broken. Until she knew the truth, she knew she could never just put it all behind her.

"Are you okay?" Damon asked her softly. He touched her cheek gently, brushing the tear away.

"I don't know," Lily whispered. Damon cupped her cheek and guided her face to look at him. Her lip trembled as he looked at her, concern easily written on his face.

"Do you want to try talking it out?" he asked, caressing her cheek with his thumb. Lily thought about it for a moment.

"I don't know that it won't make things worse," Lily confessed. Damon smiled slightly, knowingly. He continued to cup her cheek, and Lily's heart ached. "Why didn't he try to contact me? Even if he didn't want to be with me anymore."

"I can't answer that, Lily," Damon answered. Lily moved closer to him, resting her head the arm that he'd circled around her.

"Can't or won't?" Lily challenged.

"Does it matter?" Damon asked. She tilted her chin, her head dipping back.

"Do you love me?" Lily asked him.

"Do you remember back when we were in school, and Scorpius smelled that Amortentia potion?" Damon asked her hesitantly.

"Yes, he said something about it smelling like grass and stuff, claimed it was _my_ scent," Lily answered. She watched him, her hand spread over the uninjured part of his chest. She could feel his heartbeat pick up tempo as she spread her fingers out across his warm flesh.

"It was your scent," Damon nodded. He looked up at the ceiling, studying it. He covered her hand with his, pressing it firmly to his chest. She could feel his heart racing. "I know this because I know what I breathed in, I know how it felt to have your scent be the one that filled and invaded."

"Say what?" Lily gasped.

"I told you before, told him before," Damon breathed as he shifted so he could look at her, nose to nose or nearly close to it. "The only thing that kept me from pursuing you myself was the fact that I knew he had a thing for you."

"A thing? We were going to be married," Lily choked out. "We had a child together, and another on the way. "

"And if he could have, he'd have fulfilled that goal, Lily. I'm sure of it," Damon promised. "But it doesn't change the fact that I love you. Have for a long time."

"Did you send me the postcards?" Lily asked him. "And Theron?"

"I didn't want to hurt either of you, but I had to get you here," Damon explained unappologetically. "It's an unofficial declaration of war."

"War?" Lily growled. "You gave me hope."

"I know, and I'm sorry," Damon looked away.

"You could have just as easily kept things the way they were," Lily cried out.

"No, they'd already learned that I'd broken one of the very few rules that Scorpius agreed to when he agreed to take the assignment originally," Damon explained. "If he'd known you'd two have a kid together, or that you'd finally agree to marry him..."

"When did he agree to this horrible mission?" Lily sobbed.

"Not long after he became and Auror, when you guys weren't seeing a lot of each other, but he signed on for the surrendering after he thought you... _terminated._.. your pregnancy," Damon explained carefully.

"He knew for two years that he'd have to give me up, and yet he agreed to marry me?" Lily asked incredulously.

"I think he honestly believed that he could find a way out of the agreement with the Argentineans," Damon confessed.

"Is he... is he still human?" Lily asked.

"Yes, of course," Damon nodded.

"My brother's death?" Lily challenged.

"That, not even I have been given the details behind that. The eve of your wedding day was the last peaceful exchange that our government had with the Argentineans," Damon sighed. Lily pulled herself free and began to change. "Lily, where are you going?"

"I need to be alone to think," she breathed, holding in her emotions. "I'd ask you to leave so I could do it here, but you're injured and I'm guess that it's not safe for you out there right now."

"No, it's not. And it might not be safe out there for you, either, Lily," Damon explained. "I have an extraction team that will pull me out, but you're here against ministry ruling. You may not be able to return to London after this."

"Oh," Lily gasped. She took a deep breath. "I'll be careful."

"Please, do," Damon begged when he realized that she was set on leaving and that there was nothing he could say to stop her. He watched her hesitate at the door, her hand on the frame as she turned to look at him.

"I will," Lily promised.

"Hey, Lily? Can I ask you something before you leave?" Damon pushed himself up in the bed, his back bare against the pillows.

"Yeah?" Lily agreed.

"Can I have a kiss before you go?" he hesitated. She looked a little surprised, but she walked across the room, dipping down to his level, brushing her lips against his slightly. It was simple, it was sweet, and Lily felt the twist and pull of something more than lust pulling at her. Damon watched her walk to the door again. "Do you think you could ever love me back?"

"I don't know that I don't already, Damon," Lily whispered before she disappeared through the doorway. She sprinted down the steps, unable to stand another moment in the house. She was confused. She had been certain that she saw someone that looked like Scorpius the previous night, before she'd found Damon, before the attack.

She wondered if she would have died, had Diego not been there. She supposed she should thank the minister for his hospitality, and the use of his top Auror, and ask for a favor of a portkey home. She wouldn't tell him about Damon, just get the key and use it to take him home. This place, this dreadfully wet and cold place wasn't worth trying to find Scorpius, especially when she wasn't sure that he was even there.

She easily found the pub and walked up to the bar, the place was deserted but the barkeep took his time attending her. He was wiping out the same glass, Lily suspected, and he looked at her suspiciously. She didn't say anything at first, just looked at him and he looked at her.

"I'd like to talk to Raul Rosa, please," Lily requested politely. The bar keep frowned, placing his rag on the bar.

"About?"

"I just need to talk to him. I want a portkey, I need to go home," Lily rushed out in a huff. If the bar keep was expecting something from her, it wasn't that. He was unable to hide his surprise.

"I'll see if he's available."

"I'll wait here," Lily replied, taking a seat at the bar. She remained there until Diego returned to retrieve her. Lily slipped from the stool and followed him through those same doors. He didn't look happy to see her.

"Why are you here, Lily?" he asked her quietly. "Why really? Why did you come to Argentina?" Lily looked up at him, frowning. The doors, one being the minister's door the other being the exit, were on either sides of him. Diego echoed a strange familiarity in Lily's mind, a lost ghost of something she couldn't place.

"I came to get answers," Lily replied honestly. "I came to find my son's father, the truth about what happened to him. I came to find out if my brother and father died in vain. I came to find my friend."

"The... guy from last night?" Diego asked hesitantly.

"Yes," Lily admitted.

"Do you love him?" Diego asked. Lily frowned.

"I don't know that it's any of your concern," Lily replied. "And I don't know why my answer last night wasn't enough."

"I.. it's not my concern," Diego said stiffly and he headed toward the door that would led to the minister's office. He stopped just before the door and turned to Lily slowly. "No matter what happens, I wish you the best."

"Thanks," Lily replied looking at him. Without warning, he swooped down and planted a kiss on her cheek, her turning at the last minute and the briefest of brushes of lips between them had Lily stumbling backwards away from him. It was too familiar, too much like a memory that struck her like lightening. She felt tears prickle behind her eyes. If he felt anything, he didn't let on to it. He pushed the door open and lead the way into the minister's office.

"Senorita Potter, I hear you'd like to talk to me about a portkey home," he said gesturing to the chair before his desk. Lily sat, glancing at Diego, who was off in the corner, taking a swig from his flask.

"Yes, sir," Lily answered. She kept her hands folded on her lap, her purse below them.

"Can I ask why you're suddenly so eager to leave?" Minister Rosa asked.

"I've seen everything I can think of seeing this time around," Lily lied. "Plus with Christmas coming, my son will be coming home on Holiday and I need to be there to pick him up from the train."

"I see," the minister said sitting on the edge of his desk, his fingers peaked as he tapped them on his chin.

"I appreciate all you've done for me," Lily told him, gesturing toward Diego. She cringed as a sharp pain cut through her shoulder. She should have guessed that back-kitchen healing wouldn't have her back to perfect.

"Is there a problem?" he asked her.

"I fell," she lied. The minister didn't look like he believed her but didn't say anything.

"I see," he replied after a moment and pulled out a form. "Well, just fill this form out and I'll submit it."

"You can't just approve it, maybe pull a portkey out of a box or something?" Lily asked. "I really was hoping to leave immediately."

"Really? You don't have your things," the minister replied suspiciously.

"I meant to say that I'd take it back to my hostel and activate it, so I can gather my things," Lily said hurriedly. He raised his eyebrow slightly.

"Why do I get the feeling that you're not being entirely truthful with me?" The minister asked her. Lily's stomach flip-flopped with nerves. He glanced at Diego, who was watching them very carefully. He opened his drawer and began rooting around in it, withdrawing a small device.

"Sir," Diego protested. Lily glanced at him carefully before looking at the item. It began whizzing around and whistling.

"Lily Potter, do you know what this is?" he asked. Lily looked at the device.

"That's a... a... sneakoscope," Lily answered. Minister Rosa pulled his wand out from behind his back, flicking it once at Lily. Ropes sprung from the end, binding Lily tightly to the chair. Lily immediately protested.

"Just for safety's sake," the minister explained, placing the sneakoscope on the desk before her. Lily glanced at Diego briefly before she looked at the device. The minister ignored the sneakoscope for a minute, pulling Lily's purse free. He took her wand out of it, turning the small piece of wood over in his hands. "Rather small."

"I'm rather small," Lily challenged. The minister nodded and dropped it in the drawer of his desk.

"Now, Senorita Potter, Miss Potter if you will be so kindly, tell me what the Ministry of Magic in London planned to do having you and the other operatives come here," the minister asked her. His tone was cooler now, no longer the friendly tone. "And if I must remind you, if you lie or try to deceive me, I'll know." They both glanced at the sneakoscope and Lily didn't bother looking at Diego.

"I'm not an operative," Lily replied firmly. "I used to be a healer, and up until recently, I was a glorified secretary."

"Under the minister himself," Minister Rosa added leaning against the desk.

"Yes," Lily confirmed.

"You must have had access to important information, valuable to my cause," the minister murmured as he stroked his chin.

"No," Lily shook her head slightly, the only thing she could move under the ropes. "I don't even know what your cause is."

"I don't believe that, and my sneakoscope doesn't either," the minister's voice was soft, almost soothing in tone. "Do you want to change your answer?"

"It's my answer," Lily shot back at him.

"So be it," the minister almost seemed sad for a moment. "Cruccio."

Lily felt her body arch against the ropes, twisting. She tried to fight back the scream that ripped up her body. She had never felt such pain before, and she hadn't been completely numb yet when they started the cesarean with Theron, nor completely under. She felt like the pain would never end. Fire burned in her veins, consuming her. At once the pain stopped, but her body still ached from the muscle memory of it.

"I don't know what you want from me," Lily screamed at him.

"You have been in contact with operatives while you have been in my country," the minister told her. "I want to know where they are."

"I don't know what you're talking about," Lily shouted angrily.

"Oh, but I do think you do. I think you know a lot more than you're letting on," he chastised. "Your father is the great Harry Potter, one of the best Aurors around. I'm certain he's trained you well."

"I'm not an Auror, and my father is dead," Lily cried.

"Rubbish," the minister dismissed. "Now, tell me where the allegiance's head quarters are, Senorita."

"I don't know what you're talking about!" Lily screamed as another bought of severe pain ripped through her.

"Minister, maybe she doesn't know," Diego interrupted, gripping his flask hard.

"I think she does, Diego," the minister snapped. His momentary distraction lessened the curse and Lily was able get a momentary reprieve. She kept her eyes clenched shut, breathing hard. Sweat poured down her face.

"What do you want to know?" Lily gasped.

"Where is your partner, from the ministry?" the minister asked her. His wand was trained on her.

"I already told you that I don't work for the ministry. I quit before I flew here. It was supposed to be a holiday before my boy comes home," Lily wept.

"LIES!" the minister yelled at her. His face was inches from hers, his hands pressing her wrists into the armrests. Lily braced herself for another round of the Cruccio curse. Instead of the white-hot flicks of flames burning her insides, she felt her skin split as if swords were being drawn across her flesh. She cried out.

"For the love of Merlin, Lily! Tell him where Damon is!" Diego yelled at her. The minister turned to him.

"You know where?"

"Yes, sir. Damon West, Auror. She has him stashed at her hotel room," Diego confessed. "I thought she'd tell you. They were both attacked and bitten last night."

"Excellent," the minister rubbed his hands together.

"No!" Lily screamed at Diego. "How could you do this?"

"I'm sorry, Lily, but I can't just sit by and let this continue," Diego begged.

"Cruccio," the minister pointed his wand at Lily, silencing her in pain.

"Sir, I told you what you needed to know. I bet Damon would have more useful information," Diego rambled quickly.

"We'll see when you bring him back. In the meantime, I'm going to keep working on her," the minister's voice was calm and matter of fact. Diego was gone with the crack, apparated out of the room.

"Please stop," Lily sobbed.

"Tell me what you know," the minister demanded.

"I'm Lily Potter, mother of Theron Malfoy. I used to be a healer before my son was born," Lily wept. "On my wedding day, my brother was killed, my father died, and my fiancé was never heard from again, presumed dead."

"Where did they go? What was their objective?" the minister asked.

"I don't know," Lily wept. The sneakoscope had been quiet for some time.

"Wrong answer," the minister sneered. He made a whipping motion at Lily, and invisible whip of power cracked against Lily's body. She cried out.

"They would never tell me anything," Lily cried. The sneakoscope began to whistle and spin again and Lily couldn't help but think of the onetime Scorpius had told her about the vampires and trolls, and how they wanted to rise up against the Secrecy.

"That, I don't believe," he breathed in her face quietly. "I don't like hurting you, Lily. You seem like a lovely lady, but I have a ministry of my own to run and I must stop this invasion."

"Please, Minister Rosa," Lily begged. "There is nothing more I can offer you. I just want to go home."

"Why did you come here?" the minister ignored her.

"I came on holiday!" Lily shrieked as he wordlessly tortured her. Lily thought of sweet old Miss Alice Longbottom and could understand how it could break you. She knew even if she spilled all of her secrets, she'd probably still be tortured for more and killed."

"I'm back!" Diego shouted over Lily's screams, holding a struggling Damon by his arms.

"LILY!" Damon fought to pull away from Diego. "Stop! Stop hurting her! She doesn't know about any of this!"

"Damon West," the minister sneered with a smile. He turned away from Lily, her screams stopping abruptly. Damon relaxed for a moment, stopping the fight.

"Minister Rosa," Damon replied back. "I'd never take you as one that would hurt an innocent."

"She's not innocent," the minister challenged. Damon pulled out of Diego's grip and went to her side, cradling her face in his hands, tilting her battered, bruised, and abused face.

"Lily, darling, are you okay?" Damon asked her, ignoring both men in the room. She nodded with a sniffle. He stood and looked at the minister. "Release her. Portkey her out of here and I will tell you every last detail."

"Hmm," the minister tapped his chin for a second. "Such a generous offer, Senor West. Really, but I think you'll be more than willing to sing like a canary with her still under my power." Lily sobbed, biting back the scream for a moment before she writhe in pain.

"No, stop!" Damon screamed, lunging at the minister, wand drawn.

"I know you have a no-engage order," the minister laughed.

"I've gone rouge," Damon yelled at him, exchanging curses. The walls cracked around them as they shot curses back and forth. Lily's chair was blown back, knocking the wind out of her as they battled and Diego scrambled to her, ripping away the ropes and dragging her behind the desk.

"Are you okay?" he asked her, cradling her head in his lap. She looked up through the swelling and blood, past the tears and sweat into Diego's eyes. There was something painfully familiar in their silver gray.

"Your eyes," she choked. He touched her face gently, mindful of her wounds.

"I should have never promised you," he whispered as he pulled out the flask. He put it to his lips but Lily reached up, cupping it.

"It's you, isn't it?" she breathed softly. He looked at her, her eyes watching for the variations of a potion wearing off. He took a big swig, his eyes changing back to the brown they'd been before.

"I don't know who I am anymore, Lily," he muttered as he stored away the flask. She slid her hand into his shirt, touching the flask.

"Scorpius, please," she begged. He brushed her hand away.

"Lily, please," he mocked quietly. "Scorpius died almost a decade ago." He looked away, glancing over the edge of the desk to see Damon and the minister still battling. "Plus, you have Damon." She rested her hand against his cheek.

"I've missed you so very much," she cried softly. He brushed her had away effortlessly.

"I'm sorry Lily," he hung his head, holding Lily's wand in his hand. "_Obliviate_."


	15. Chapter Fourteen

**A/N**: Sorry this took so long. I was busy. 60 hours at night'll do that to you (especially when you sleep the other 60 hours, lol.).

**Disc.**: Borrowed world.

* * *

**Chapter Fourteen**

Lily felt unnaturally groggy and sore. She tried to remain still, every breath seemed to cause her some degree of discomfort. Even with her eyes closed, the lights were too bright. The gown she wore was itchy, and her feet were trapped under a blanket. She pulled her knee up slightly to find that she could only bring it so far before it stopped, cuff on her ankles holding it in place. She went to reach it but found her hands were bound to the bed. She might have struggled if it weren't for the blinding pain ripping through her body.

She couldn't remember a time she was in more pain. She couldn't even be worried about where she was or how she got there. The pain was unbearable, burning through her veins white hot. She kept her eyes close, clenching them tight to block out the lights. She could hear the beeps and sounds of somewhere familiar, but the pain removed all of her common sense and ability to think. She tilted her head back slightly, ignoring the feeling of ripping and screamed. She began to thrash about, the sensations of acid burning her insides while the fabric of her gown and sheet felt to be tearing off her flesh.

She twisted against the cuff that held her in place, a vicious circle of pain. Her screams echoed in the small room, bouncing off the walls and assaulting her senses. She was out of control, and somewhere deep in her foggy mind, she recalled a similar scene years before when her mother had been in this bed, tied down and screaming. She sobbed and choked on her screams, locked deep within her own mind.

She was oblivious to anyone, her eyes wide but unseeing at the bright flashes of light blinded her. Her body was in such intense pain she didn't register anyone's hands on her, the gentle brushes of fingers against her skin. She writhed and twisted, the movements tormenting. With each passing moment, she was in more distress than before. She pulled her head up as far as she could and slammed it back down, the pillow slipping out from under her head. She could hear the whispers of someone nearby, perhaps talking to her, but to her ears it sounded like a swarm of angry hornets in her head.

She screamed wordlessly until her voice was hoarse, never once stopping. She kept her eyes clenched shut, trying to block out the too bright light. She seemed to be of two minds, the rational side that knew if she could just get a hold of herself, she could find relief and the primitive side that was in a constant state of agitated reaction. Panic rolled in her stomach. Is this what her mother had suffered through for two years before she died? Had her mother been of two minds, the primitive one reaction to every piece of stimulus in ever increasing increments while her rational mind was locked away behind the closed doors, tortured and lost, until it was easier to surrender to the long sleep.

With each moment, the pain grew and she tried to close her eyes, to shut it out. Her hurting muscles refused to tire out, even with the ache of too much use. The door to the room opened, a man with brown hair followed by a female, both dressed in the lab gowns. She recognized the man, from somewhere, but her thoughts were too fuzzy and loud with all the screaming going on to think. He walked up to the side of the bed, looking down at Lily as she thrashed about.

Lily tried to make eye contact, but found her eyes wouldn't comply, which frustrated her and caused her to thrash about more. The female remained near the door and Lily wondered if she was supposed to know her, too. The man reach down and gently cupped her cheek, the tender caress felt like a sledgehammer to the side of her head and she immediately cried out. She locked eyes with him for all of five seconds, but in that briefest contact she knew he heard her. He immediately removed her hand and pulled his wand out, flicking at the lights. The lights dimmed to barely glowing and almost instantaneously the room grew quiet.

"Lily, I've paralyzed you for the time being," he told her leaning over her slightly. Lily knew that whatever he'd done, it must have worked. She was no longer thrashing about and the pain was ebbing away slowly. She could almost formulate thoughts of her own. He waved the other person off, taking the small rolling chair and rolling it up to the bedside. "Honey, I know you're in there. I don't know what happened to you, but I will heal you. Somehow, I will heal you."

Lily sighed softy at his whispered words and felt the edge of tension work its way out of her shoulders, her body unfurling from the pain and capture of her own mind. Lily rested, stretching out until she felt her fingers and toes and held on tightly to them. She flexed them, pausing for the flash of pain that was sure to come. She felt the dull ache of old sounds healed, and found herself surprised that the pain that had her screaming out was all but gone. She flexed her fingers, the skin feeling a touch tight and new against her new-found ability. A tickle on her nose had her reaching up to scratch it before she realized that she was no longer bound to the bed.

She slowly opened her eyes, the light still painfully bright as she blinked away what seemed like years of sleep. She wondered how long she'd been asleep. She closed her eyes again, trying to think back to when she'd fallen asleep. Her eyes snapped open and she winced against the bright light.

"You're awake?" a voice exclaimed and Lily clamped her hands over her ears, glaring at the too pretty girl in the red and white striped jumper. "Sorry. I've just never had one wake up."

"One what?" Lily croaked. Her mouth was sticky. "Water."

"Oh, yes, of course," the girl whispered rushing to the sink. The clink of her bracelet against the basin rang like the Tower Bell, and Lily kept her hands over her ears. The rush of water from the faucet sounded like rapids, and Lily sighed a breath of relief when the sounds finally ceased.

"Thank you," Lily said quietly as she drained the cup. The water was slightly metallic but her thirst didn't care at the off-tasting water. She handed the cup back to the girl who refilled it two more times before Lily had the edge of thirst seemed to wane.

"You've been asleep for a very long time," the girl whispered. The sensitivity seemed to be dropping in twain as she became more aware of her surroundings. Lily stretched and her body had that stiff feel from lack of use. She moved to stand and the girl pushed her back against the bed as if she were nothing.

"Hey," Lily protested.

"Miss Potter, you need to gather your strength," the girl told her. "Stay here and I'll go see if the healer is about."

Lily debated protesting but she was just too tired to care. She felt like she'd just completed a marathon and all she'd done is sit up and have a bit of a drink. She closed her eyes for a second only to be startled awake by the touch of a very masculine hand on her cheek. She looked into a pair of the most compassionate eyes she'd ever set sights on, and he smiled, melting her slightly.

"Hey there, sleepy head," he said quietly. "Dana says you woke up, and I see that you have."

"I was thirsty," Lily explained. He chuckled and Lily could feel it tingling in her feet.

"You've been asleep for a very long time, Lily," he explained. "The other healers thought that you'd never wake up, and that we'd have to put you on the floor where you and I took care of Frank for so long."

"Frank?" Lily frowned.

"Frank Longbottom," he explained. He seemed to search her face for something and frowned slightly. "Lily, do you remember Frank Longbottom? He was one of your favorite patients."

"Should I?" Lily asked as her brow puckered slightly.

"Lily do you know who I am?" he asked her hesitantly, and Lily was sure she saw something in his face that was more than a healer checking on a patient. That was there, too, but Lily could swear that under it was a bit of fear and heartbreak.

"You're the healer," she replied simply. His frown became more prominent. "Did I answer that wrong?"

"No, no, of course not," he smiled at her but something in his face atoned to the fact that she had answered the question very wrong. "Lily, you do remember that's your name right?"

"Yes," Lily nodded once. He smiled again, this time it was more genuine.

"Good, Lily," he patted her hand slightly "I'm your healer, Marshall Clocks." He paused as if expecting the light of recognition to light her face. Instead he was met with mild curiosity. He continued, "You came to St. Mungo's a while back. You were in rough shape and honestly, very few believed you'd pull through."

"How long have I been here?" Lily asked curiously.

"Four months," he told her after a brief pause. Confusion swept over her face and he continued. "You arrived through the emergency department, riding on a portkey. You were barely alive physically, and mentally... mentally we thought you might have already gone from this world. We've seen it before."

"What happened to me?" Lily asked as she wrapped her arms around her body.

"We don't know," Marshal admitted. "A curse, a jinx, a spell gone wrong? It really could have been any of a number of things. You came in without identification, shrieking like a banshee and half dead. The security force had to stun you several times before we could restrain you."

"Glad I don't remember that," Lily muttered to herself and he laughed. Something faraway sparked but dissipated when she to latch on to it.

"I happened to be on that night. You were really bad off," he explained to her. He hesitated. "I had to identify you, and even then there was a niggling of doubt in the back of my head. Do you remember any of this?"

"No," she told.

"After a few weeks of near-non-stop screaming, they were ready to throw in the towel and transfer you to the untreatable ward, but I convinced your family to allow me to paralyze you. I saw how broken you were when you came in, and what they'd done to you," he turned his head away for a second and Lily touched his hand. He turned and looked at her, concern easily read on his face.

"Hey, Healer Clocks, it's okay," Lily promised. He smiled slightly.

"Do you know how good it feels to be able to sit here with you, Lily?" he asked. She smiled uncertainly. He sighed. "The pain, a body can only handle so much pain, your body and your mind fractured. It took four months for it to repair itself."

"I feel fine," Lily offered with a smile.

"Your wounds have healed, but I think the scars remain," he explained. She looked down at her arms.

"It's okay," she shrugged.

"I didn't mean the scars on your outside, Lily," he explained. "Whatever was done to you, someone went to a lot of trouble to erase a big portion of your life from your memory. What's the last thing you remember?" Lily glanced down at her fingers as she thought back.

"I think I remember school," she told him with a small frown. "But even that is Swiss cheese."

"Do you remember... do you remember Theron Malfoy?" he asked her hesitantly. Lily could feel that tiny spark but if it were meant to flame to life, it was very disappointing as it winked out.

"I... I don't know," she started to get upset slightly. "No, I think I should but I don't. Who is he?"

"He's your son," Marshall explained to her. Lily grew angry.

"I don't have a baby! Why would you lie about something like that? This isn't a very nice joke, Healer," she cried at him. She clenched the edge of the sheets, twisting them angrily.

"Oh, I wish it were just a lie," he sighed. He stood and walked to the door poking his head out into the hallway for a second. He turned back to Lily, still angrily clenching the sheet. "Your son has spent his every free moment waiting for you to awaken."

"I don't have a son," she growled slightly. She glared at him as he held the door open and a little boy walked in, holding a bunch of flowers that looked to have been gripped too tightly at the stems. He hesitated slightly, his eyes on Lily. Lily stared back, trying to see the truth in the healer's words. The boy was young, but not so young that he shouldn't be in school yet. He had tussled blond hair, as if he'd been running his hand through it all day, and steely gray eyes, that were wide and pooling with tears.

"Mum?" He breathed, and though Lily knew she couldn't possibly be this beautiful boy's mother, her heart broke at the tone of his young voice. He tossed the flowers aside and launched himself at her, her stiffening slightly as he wrapped his arms around her neck, burying his face in her hair. She hesitantly patted his back as his little frame shook with tears. "Mummy!"

Her heart broke. For the moment, she wanted nothing more than to be this child's mother. She knew it was wrong to want to gather him up in her arms and cradle him, he wasn't hers to keep. Tears slipped down her face, dripping into his too blond hair. She shook her head with a sob.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry," she wept. "I'm sorry I don't know you."

"Mummy? It's me, Theron. T.C., mummy, please," the boy cried loudly as Lily began to pry his fingers free. She was sobbing along with him.

"I'm not your mum, I'm sorry," she cried and he sobbed harder.

"Mummy, why? Why? I've been so good, and I made Slytherin house, like you and Dad, and I'm making good marks," he wept. Lily clenched her eyes, trying to block out the boy fighting the healer from removing him. "No, Mum! Mum, please don't leave me. Don't send me away mum! Muuuuuum!"

"Why did you torture that poor little boy?" Lily demanded when Healer Clocks return. She was seething, anger rolling off her in waves.

"Merlin, Lily, that's the last thing I wanted to do to T.C., I swear. I loved that little boy as if he had been my own when we were together," Healer Clocks confessed. Lily leaned back slowly.

"We... we were together?" she asked. He nodded and opened his mouth to say something. "No, you said we were together, and you loved that boy, yet you let him come in here to face this shell of a person I am? How could you do that to him? Better to have let me die than this!"

"You don't mean that, Lily," he denied.

"Did you see his face? If I really am his mother, I've probably just damaged him for life," Lily sobbed. He reached for her and she slapped his hand away. "No, Healer. Leave me be!"

"I'll... I'll come back in a bit to check on you," he murmured but she didn't look up at him, just hugged her arms around herself, letting the tears flow down her face.

Lily didn't look up when he came back in again, followed by two men. She could hear them shuffling in, either trying to get her attention to look up or just busy for the moment. She frowned and laid her head on her arms, staring at the blank wall next to her.

"Lily?" her brother asked hesitantly, though his voice sounded older than it should have. She slowly pulled her head up off her arms and looked at him. Her mouth dropped slightly at the aged wizard standing there. Sure, he looked like Albus, albeit a much older, worn and weary Albus. He stood still, not moving forward until she opened her arms and welcomed him into them.

Albus embraced her, letting her cry in frustration. He couldn't make out anything she said, but for the moment that was okay. He just rubbed small circles on her shoulder while she sobbed. After a minute or two, the sobbing subsided and she took the offered hanky to mop the tears off her face. She kept one arm across her midsection while she looked at him.

"I don't understand what happened," she confessed with a slight shiver. Albus looked to the other man in the room, Healer Clocks fiddling with the chart.

"Healer, can we have a moment?" Albus asked him. He looked to Lily.

"I don't know," he said slowly.

"He's my big brother," Lily protested to him. "I never have anything to fear with him." Albus shot a guilty looked to the healer and looked away.

"Alright, but I'll be just outside," Healer Clocks warned. "I'll go check on your son."

"Fine," Lily sighed, not ready to deal with anymore of that at the moment. She looked to her brother, expecting him to launch into explanation or to assure her that he'd knew how to fix her head, but Albus wasn't looking at her. Instead, he was staring at the taller man who looked like a much older, aged version of that little boy. "Oh, Merlin. Please tell me that you and I didn't have that little boy together."

"What? No! Theron is not my son!" the man insisted in shock. "You don't remember me, then? I'm Theron's grandfather, Scorpius' father, Draco?"

"Scorpius?" Lily pondered that, again a flicker of something just beyond the edge of her mind. She shook her head when the wisps of memory were gone. All that remained is something about cake, a distant and faded gray memory from a life time ago. "I was married and had a child with this Scorpius fella? Where is he, then? Why hasn't he come to find out why I can't remember our life togther?"

"No, Lily, you two were never married," Albus explained. Lily gasped.

"I'm a tart?!" Lily gasped.

"Merlin, I hope not!" Albus exclaimed.

"No, you're not a 'tart', Lily," Draco assured her. "I've known you since you were a kid, and you've never once been a 'tart'."

"Oh, thank goodness," Lily sighed, her and to her heart. She looked at him carefully. "You're an Auror, right?"

"We both are," Draco explained gesturing to Albus and himself.

"Oh, you're an Auror too?" Lily surprise had her brother scowling. She wiped the look off her face and directed her attention back to Draco. "Mr. Malfoy, what happened to me? Why can't I remember, well, most of my life?"

"I have a theory," he explained quietly. He stepped forwards sitting on the very edge of her bed. She drew her knees up, circling her arms around them as she had as a child, intent on listening to him. "Lily who did you meet up with in Argentina?"

"Argentina? I've..." she thought hard, frowning. "I don't think I've ever been to Argentina."

"The portkey you traveled in on, it originated in Argentina," Draco explained.

"I... I don't know. I don't know what the answer to that is," Lily admitted with a shrug. Her face was full of honesty.

"If you'd agree, I'd like to try to use some legilimancy to see if there's anything that could be helpful," Draco explained to her. She looked surprised and glanced to Albus, who wouldn't meet her eyes.

"Is it dangerous?" she asked Draco. He glanced away for a second.

"It does not come without risks," he admitted.

"Albus?" Lily asked, drawing her brother's eye to her. "Would James agree to it?"

"Lily, James is dead," he choked out. "He died on your wedding day. Same as Dad."

Lily cradled her face in her hands sobbing outwardly, her whole aching body racked with each and every sob. Fresh waves of tears slipped between her slender fingers, causing drop marks on the too white sheets of her hospital bed. Albus moved to comfort her, but Draco was there, first, wrapping his arms around her and pulling her close. She pulled back, screaming angrily at him.

"Someone's done this to me. Someone's has stolen in here," she screamed slamming the palms of her hands to the sides of her head, over and over. "Someone's stolen into my head and erased every man I ever loved, except you Albus. Except you? Why not you? Why? Why? Why Albus? Why?"

"You two are going to have to leave," Marshall demanded as he pushed them out of the room quickly. He went to Lily's side, but it was too late. She was spiral down, out of control, and all he could do was to wrap his arms around her and ride out the ride.


	16. Chapter Fifteen

**Disc.:** Borrowed world.

**Disc. #2:** Not spell checked or editor or anything.

* * *

**Chapter Fifteen**

Lily sat in a chair, pulling on her sneakers. At least these were more her style. Draco had brought a suitcase of Lily's clothes from her apartment to prepare Lily to be released from St. Mungo's. She had dug through the stash of clothes he'd brought until she came across a well worn pair of dark jeans and a tee shirt that was close to the color of her eyes. She'd been disappointed to see so many skirts and dress shirts in the mix, and Lily had been horrified by the high heel shoes.

"Almost ready to be discharged?" Marshall asked her.

"Still against it?" Lily retorted.

"Yeah," he nodded once. She grinned.

"You did insist that you'd personally do house checks and things, so I'm sure I'll be fine," Lily told him. He raised an eyebrow at her but said nothing more. Draco entered the room, a slight look of annoyance on his face as he looked at Marshall.

"Healer Clocks, physically Lily is picture perfect, you said so yourself," Draco told him coolly.

"And she is, but I still need to say that it's against my professional opinion that she go home alone," Marshall explained. "Even with regular check-ups with her health care providers."

"I'm sure the provided helpers will be fine," Draco retorted.

"She doesn't even have a wand!" Marshall protested.

"You won't sign off on her being wanded," Draco snapped back.

"I don't believe that she's whole enough," Marshall growled.

"Hey, hey guys, I am right here," Lily intervened. "I get it, really. Marshall, you're worried for my safety and what's left of my sanity, and I get it. I do remember enough to not let in murderers in my apartment, to not set the place on fire, or to take a bath with a toaster. Draco, you worry about my ability to defend myself and to my ability to do magic and stuff, and I get that. I already agreed to the ministry provided help."

"That's what worries me most," Marshall grumbled but didn't elaborate.

"I've been in this hospital for nearly a month. I don't feel ill or broken. I'm not even sore anymore, my muscles are strong, and frankly, I'm not getting any better mentally," Lily clicked the suitcase closed, leaving it for Draco to deal with. "My being here, it's not helping. Maybe if I return home, if I'm surrounded by my old life, some of it will start coming back."

"I hope you're right, Lily, but it typically doesn't," Marshall reminded her needlessly. He'd taken her to meet Gilderoy Lockhart, a wizard that had suffered much the same affliction of a memory charm, who after nearly forty years had just recently regain simpler memories. Lily frowned at him and she could tell that he immediately felt bad.

"Ready?" Draco asked her, whipping his wand out and flicking at her suitcase, that seemed to disappear in to thin air. He offered his arm to her. Lily nodded.

"I'll be by to check on you," Marshall promised but Lily couldn't help but think, memory or not, it sounded like more of a threat directed toward Draco. She took Draco's arm and glimpsed once last look Marshall as she aparated for the first time since she could remember. It was an awful experience, the pull from behind her stomach, the squeezing feeling until she was certain that she wouldn't be able to breathe again.

"I should have warned you," Draco apologized as the sensation rushed away. They were in the hallway of her apartment and she wondered if that was normal protocol. It seemed that it'd be likely to be witness by any old person if they just popped up here and there without any warning. She debated asking but decided that since she wouldn't be aparating, it didn't matter much.

"This is my apartment?" Lily asked as Draco opened the door and the two of them entered.

"Yes," Draco nodded once as she walked in slowly, trying to take it all in. She frowned slightly. "Is there a problem?"

"I kind of just always expected that when I grew up, I'd have one of those grand pianos," Lily sighed. "I guess I didn't grow up like I expected."

"You did, for a time," Draco explained. "I don't know when or why you removed it, though. Maybe after you left for a time."

"Why my dad died?" Lily asked.

"Maybe," Draco glanced around the place. "I honestly didn't really come around a lot. Often, Theron and you would come to the manor."

"Theron. My... son," Lily hesitated.

"Yes," Draco nodded. Lily wandered around the apartment, touching things as she tried to make herself remember things. Sometimes, depending on what she touched, she could feel the slightest, faintest breath of something she could only hope was a memory.

"I must have been a very boring person," Lily commented as she flipped up the flap to a leather case. Draco chuckled.

"I doubt anything about you was ever boring," he murmured. He gave her the grand tour of her own apartment, touching the doors as he went through rather than opening the rooms. They had agreed that Lily should be alone when she opened the rooms, to see if it would trigger any memories.

"I'll contact you if I need anything," Lily promised, nodding at the caged owl by the window.

"You probably won't see them, but there will be ministry guards around just until we can make sure that you're out of danger for another attack," Draco mentioned as he headed to the front door. "Don't worry about work right now, or anything else. Just rest, relax, and try to heal okay?"

"Okay," Lily nodded. He paused, then fished a plastic card out of his wallet.

"It's a muggle credit card, since you're probably going to have a hard time getting in to Diagonally or any of the other wizarding establishments without a witch or wizard's help until we get things situated at the ministry."

"Thank you," Lily took the card and looked at it. It had her name on it already. "Um, how do I..."

"Use it? You just swipe it at the registers," Draco explained quickly. Lily laughed.

"No, I know how to use a credit card, but I assume at some time a bill will come and I'll have to pay it," Lily explained. Draco grinned.

"You're the mother of my grandson, your dad and I were pretty good friends those last years," Draco explained. He lowered his voice an octave. "Lily, I would do anything in my power to help you. I love you as if you were my own flesh and blood. I would give you the world if I could."

"Thank you, Draco," Lily replied.

"Think about what I offered you in the hospital," Draco whispered as he started to walk away. Lily couldn't help herself. She launched herself at him, embracing him. Draco was thrown off guard. Lily hadn't been a physically affectionate child toward him, or anyone really, that he'd seen growing up, or as an adult.

"I'll think about it," Lily promised as she released him. Draco couldn't respond, the lump in his throat forcing him to leave without another word, closing the door behind him as he went. Lily stared at the door for a minute before she decided to take a tour of the apartment. She pushed open the bedroom, to what she assumed must have been her bedroom.

She tried to remember, but she didn't even know what she was trying to remember. Maybe, she wondered, it would be best not to remember. She had read the articles, under the eyes of healers, of what happened to her mother, the unclassified version, and her father. Her cousins visited, her aunt and uncle and grandmother as well, all older than she remembered. She spent hours staring at the reflection, her reflection, moving her mouth and making faces that were reflected in a thirties-face unfamiliar to her.

She had lost a lot, she decided from what she was told, the pain was probably unbearable. Maybe, she wondered, someone had done her a great favor, wiping away all that pain. She glanced up at a portrait of her, cuddling a tiny fisted baby while the blond haired man that look so much like Draco, so much like the man she didn't remember. She stared up at it for a long time, watching the tiny fists waving back and forth from under the blanket, the way she looked so content with him in her arms, and the way the man looked at the both of them like they were his world.

Lily wiped a single tear from her face. There was no way that not remembering this could be preferred. She was once so in love, so completely in love with this baby and this man. They were once her whole world. She glanced around the room, her eyes falling to thick bound books at the bottom of one of the very full bookshelves. She walked over, pulling them all off the shelf and stacking them up on the coffee table. She sat down on the sofa, looking at them. These were her memories in these, the ones that had been taken in photograph form.

She pulled the first of many books toward her, balancing it on her lap while she took a big breath and opened the page. The first few books were early pictures of her when she was a child. These pictures, she remembered easily, the memories still very much intact in her head. She laughed remembering different events in each of them, thankful for them. She flipped through the pages slowly, tracing the edge of pictures where she was laughing with her brothers, being hugged by her parents.

The second and third books showed her the progression of her aging, with some of the memories starting to get hazy just before she started school. She remembered things like her brothers' first days of school, when they heading off to ride the big crimson train. There were some hazy edges, and she realized that she must have remembered something of her brothers, both of them, if she could remember their first days. Excitement bubbled in her, maybe should could remember on her own.

She closed her eyes, remembering her first day of school. It was the first experience with memories with huge holes in it. She wanted to ask someone who had been there with her, someone who would know and be able to fill in the holes, but she drew a blank. She remembered her mother hugging her and Lily remembered dragging her trunk towards the train. She could picture it clear as day, the weight of the handle in her hand, the smell of the coal in the air. Lily closed her eyes, remembering in detail standing on the step trying to get it aboard.

She remembered a shadow falling across her, a hand coming down on hers to help her hoist the trunk. She could almost remember the heat from his hand. Lily remembered turning her face, looking up into... nothing. Nothing was there. It was hazy and lost to her. Lily opened her eyes, frowning and snapped the book shut. Whoever he had been to her, he wasn't now. She knew he had to have been important, though. Her head hurt and she felt like she needed to get some air. She abandoned the book on the table and headed toward the door.

"Miss Potter?" a voice jerked her from her reverie as she walked outside her apartment door. Lily jumped to see a stranger standing there.

"Can I help you?" Lily asked.

"I was about to ask you the same," he replied.

"You're the guard?" she asked realizing that the ministry would probably be very thorough. He nodded once. "Well, I'm fine, really. I'm just going for a walk."

"I'll walk with you," he told her. Lily frowned. "It's my new assignment."

"You're an Auror, huh?" Lily asked. He grinned. "You must have done something pretty bad to be assigned to me. Usually Aurors have more interesting assignments. Or at least, I'd think they would."

"I don't know," he shrugged. "I can think of worse assignments." Lily blushed. She didn't know why, but she was flattered and looked at him. He was young, and she had to remind herself that she wasn't in her teens or twenties, like this man walking beside her down the stair, but in her early thirties now.

"You don't have to be so polite," Lily whispered as they passed one of what Lily assumed was her neighbor, with his dark hair and being easily a head taller than her. She felt something twist in her stomach in the briefest moment that their eyes met, but he quickly looked away and continued past them without hesitation. She pushed aside the thought that there was something about him; chalking it up to being her neighbor.

"Believe me, I know that Miss Potter," the guard said with a smile.

"Please, call me Lily. I already feel old enough as it is," Lily made a face and he laughed.

"I'm Brody," he offered stretching his hand out to her. Lily shook it quickly. "And for the record, you're not old. You don't look a day over twenty. I'm going to bet it's those great Potter genes."

"Have you seen my brother, Albus?" Lily snickered. Brody the guard laughed.

"Yeah, I trained with him. Obviously, he's didn't get the Potter gene on aging," Brody offered. "But that might have to do more with stress."

"He's got a big family, yeah?" Lily asked. She could vaguely remember lots of small children.

"Yes, your nieces. There might be some nephews in there, but I don't know for sure. I know your other brother had a son, too," Brody explained as they hit the street.

"I have cousins, I remember that," Lily continued. "Rose and Hugo, both Aurors."

"Rose retired to stay at home with her children, but yes, they were both Aurors," Brody explained with a nod. Lily hesitated.

"How come they didn't have someone I know be my guard?" Lily asked. Brody frowned for a second.

"I don't know. They didn't tell me. I suspect that they want you to remember on your own, or maybe it was a concession that the healers made the ministry make," he responded after a moment. "A lot of people have been discussing you."

"Are you sure you're supposed to tell me that?" Lily teased as she stopped in front of a coffee shop that seemed almost painfully familiar. She could remember her and Rose going there for something, Rose was pregnant but Lily didn't remember why the place would trigger an unhappy panic in her.

"Do you want to go inside and have a cup of coffee?" Brody asked her.

"I don't know," Lily frowned at the door.

"Does this place bother you?" he asked. Lily glanced inside.

"I don't know, I'm sure with it being as close as it is to my apartment, I've been here a million times, but something about it makes me feel... guilty, almost sad. I don't know why," Lily murmured. Brody opened the door and held it for her.

"Now sounds as good as any to face your past, huh?" he smiled at her gently and ushered her inside. Lily stood in line with him, trying to figure out what to order.

"Lily, it's been ages! Same ol' same?" the barista's voice was bright and her smile seemed genuine.

"Sure," Lily replied uncertainly. The barista looked at the guard beside her.

"And you?" she asked.

"I'll have what Lily's having," he replied with a wink that made the girl giggle.

"How's TC? Enjoying boarding school?" the barista asked as she moved around behind the counter making coffee.

"TC?" Lily whispered. Brody dropped his mouth to her ear.

"Your son, Theron," Brody explained.

"He's good," Lily lied. In truth, she had no idea if he was or not. She hadn't seen him since that first time. Draco had sent him back to Hogwarts.

"Coming home for summer holiday, soon, I suppose," the barista chattered as she placed two cups in front of them with a few biscuits.

"Hm," Lily murmured distractedly passing over the plastic card. Brody carried the cups to a table that felt almost unbearable for her to sit at, to sit across from him. Her stomach twisted painfully and she had the feeling of fleeing.

"What are you thinking?" Brody asked her.

"I'm thinking that I have a kid that I don't remember with a man I don't remember, and this place reminds me of something I can't remember," Lily sighed, dropping her head into her hands for a moment.

"What do you remember about this place?" he asked.

"I came here with Rose at some point, she was pregnant," Lily felt like she was searching in a dark room with her eyes closed, her hands clamping down but just missing with the brush of her fingertips. "It doesn't make sense. I remember Rose clear as day, with only chunks missing. I remember she had a daughter, Tabby, and I remember her just fine for the most part, though I forget her birth. I know I was there, I have a picture of me holding my niece just born, but for whatever reason I can't remember why I would have felt sad being here with Rose."

"Why don't we call her and ask?" Brody suggested after a minute.

"Am I allowed to?" Lily asked.

"I can't see why asking your cousin to meet you for a cup of coffee wouldn't be allowed," Brody winked at her and stood. "I'll ring her and see if she'll meet you. Plus, this coffee is dreadful, I think I'll get something else to drink." He patted his breast pocket as he stood and Lily watched him step just outside. She only glanced up with the rare ray of sunshine glinted off of something silvery metal that he was storing away in his pocket. It triggered something, almost a memory of a far-away place and another guard that was supposed to protect her, but it was gone almost as quickly as it was there.

"What did she say?" Lily asked as he came back in, a bottle of water in his hand. He didn't look pleased.

"She said that she wasn't allowed to right now. The minister has forbidden her, and a long list of people, to visit with you until it makes its decision on what to do with you," he frowned. He checked his watch. "We should probably start heading back now. You need your rest, Miss Potter."

"I rested for four months, and was captive for another four weeks," Lily protested. Still, she stood and threw away her barely touched cup and biscuits, following him out of the coffee shop. "I hoped she could shed some light on things. Who'd have thought that a coffee shop would have been so taboo to the ministry."

"Hm," Brody grunted. He wasn't the same jovial person she'd walked to the coffee shop with. Whatever happened between him leaving to call Rose and returning had been bad enough that he had returned to rigid formalities. Lily walked along side him all the way back, but had never felt more alone... well, that she could remember.

He didn't say anything to her when they arrived at her apartment. He tapped on her door with his wand, the door swinging open to allow her entrance. She walked in and the door closed before she could say anything more to him. She glanced at the tomes of pictures, but turned away. She didn't want to look at pictures of a life she didn't remember completely. She thought about checking out the other two rooms in the apartment but opted instead to shower and head to bed. She suddenly felt exhausted, drained, and she couldn't imagine why.


	17. Chapter Sixteen

**Disc.:** Plot is mine, most of the characters are not.

* * *

**Chapter Sixteen**

She was certain that she was going stir crazy in her apartment. It had been two weeks with very minimal interaction from anyone. The healer had come, but not Marshall. The ministry had changed their mind at the last minute and substituted him with another healer, a large woman with big hands. Lily didn't really care to focus on this stranger, and didn't make small talk. She went through all the albums, some pictures exactly how she remembered them in her head, others seemingly made up for all they did for her.

She had paced the apartment plenty, until she was certain she could do so blindfolded in the dark and be able to navigate it. She even ventured into the boy's room, walking among his things, opening drawers and cabinets. Nothing sparked anything to her. She sat on the edge of his bed, picking up a worn teddy bear and cradled it to her, closing her eyes and breathing deeply. She took slow, deep breaths trying to draw to mind anything. After a few minutes, she growled frustrated and a bit embarrassed. She was angry that someone had taken from her parts of her life like this, that she was basically locked away in her apartment without anyone to talk to and few memories to keep her occupied.

She tossed the bear on the bed and stood. She glanced at the side table drawer and hesitantly opened it, half expecting something to be there. The drawer was oddly empty, void of even dust. Frowning, she closed the drawer and left the room, pausing only momentarily to glance back before flipping out the light and wandering back to the living room area. She stared at the door, willing anyone to enter. She wondered if one of the three guards were out there. She noticed that they rotated between Brody, an old man named Chuck, and a sweet older lady name Sharity. None of the three chatted with her, rather they followed her when she left the apartment.

It drove Lily insane. She may not have had all her memories, but she knew that she was a social person. She could feel that to her core. She sent messages to family via owl, and even requested people to visit her. Several memos had been inked and sent to the various ministry official and even the minister. Each one was returned to her with vague indications of soon or eventually or that they'd be in contact. Even Draco had brushed her off. The only people she saw regularly were her guards that held her like a prisoner of her own apartment, and occasionally she'd see the neighbor that lived in apartment 4C.

He, in and of himself, was an enigma. He always looked angry or upset when he'd see her and she'd always stop to watch him walk by, usually on the stairs or the lift, but sometimes in the hallway as well. He'd blatantly ignore her as if he didn't see or hear her. Being slighted like that enraged her. It was simply rude. They'd obviously been neighbors before the 'accident' as she was now calling it.

"You know, it's rude to just ignore your neighbor when she greets you in the lift," Lily took to saying every single time they found themselves in the lift at the same time. He would meet her eyes for a moment in the reflection of the doors, but never respond. Like clockwork, he'd bolt out the door and disappear out of sight as if he wasn't even there.

"You shouldn't harass your neighbors, Miss Potter," Brody whispered once and Lily laughed. It was one of the few and only times that he'd talk to her since that first day, and other than generalized pleasantries of greeting and dismissal.

"I'll keep that in mind, Brody," Lily told him, flipping her hair over her shoulder. She watched the days tick off the calendar, June edging closer. She had yet to be talked to by the minister, or summoned by the ministry. She decided that if they weren't going to address her, she'd address them herself.

She'd have preferred the sneakers, jeans, and tee shirts, but knew for this she'd be better suited to dress her age. She looked through her closet, picking a skirt and a shirt that she hoped screamed adult. She thought about the heels but was certain she'd fall down and opted for knee high black boots. She figured, if nothing else, she would be able to kick someone in the shin if it came to that. She did her hair up, and paused in front of the mirror, thinking she still looked older than she felt but not looking quite like she was in her thirties quite yet.

She grabbed her purse and opened the door, stepping out into the hall. She barely glanced at Brody, who was in the middle of drinking something and choked slightly, storing the flask away quickly as she stalked to the elevator. She reached it before him, pushing her neighbor back into the elevator and slamming her hand over the button, sending energy into it to close quickly. She heard Brody's protest as the elevator made its slow decent down.

"Hey, what's the meaning of-"

"Look, we have been neighbors for years I suspect, maybe not all at once, I know you know who I am, and I implore you to please, help me," Lily rambled without taking a breath. She looked at him pleading. "Just tell me what your name is and why you won't talk to me." He hesitated, glancing as the elevator passed the second floor.

"I'm Damon West," he breathed as the elevator stopped on the first floor. "And I'm forbidden to talk to you because the ministry wishes it."

"Why?" Lily demanded as the doors started to slowly slide open.

"Because, once upon a time, we used to be intimate," he whispered as he eased towards the back of the elevator, pretending to be checking his phone as Brody, Sharity, and Chuck entered in a rush, wands raised.

"Miss Potter, are you okay?" Sharity asked coolly as she looked at Damon. Lily glanced up at her, surprise on her face.

"Oh, yes, delightful!" Lily responded brightly as she zipped her purse closed. Sharity reached for it, though Brody grabbed it first and started to rifle through it. Lily frowned. "I don't know what you hope to find in there. I've already looked and there wasn't a single piece of gum!"

"Oh," Brody muttered. He handed her purse back but shot Damon a glance that could only have been classified as down right hostile. "You left in such a hurry that we became alarmed that something was wrong."

"Nope, just in a hurry. Things to do, people to see," Lily's voice was positively saccharine.

"Well, Miss Potter, I'll join you while Brody finished up checking the elevator for malfunction," Chuck told her as he took Lily by her upper arm and gently steered her towards the lobby doors. Lily glanced back to see Brody and Sharity descending on Damon, but he wasn't looking at them. She saw him staring right at her and he smiled, her returning the smile. She was certain that he'd be in trouble, possibly seriously so, but she couldn't help but think that there was another person so close to her that knew her secrets.

"Hopefully they can figure out what happened to the elevator," Lily chattered. "Funny thing it just slamming shut like that. My poor neighbor must have been terribly confused by the whole thing."

"Miss Potter, where are we heading?" Chuck asked nervously as they wandered on foot. He was dressed in a suit, but even in this area he was out of place.

"Oh, Chuck! It's such a surprise!" Lily grinned at him, her smile wide. She might not have had her memory, but she knew a thing or two about area and knew that someone like Chuck might not have been too enthusiastic about it. A few thuggish looking men watched from across the street.

"I think we should just take a cab, or perhaps have Brody and Sharity join us," Chuck murmured as more than a few people seemed to focus on the two of them walking at break-neck speed down the street.

"No," Lily snapped with such hostile finality that she even surprised herself. She shook her head. "I'm not going to be holed up in my apartment like I'm some prisoner of Azkaban. I'm firing you, Sharity, and Brody."

"You can't fire us," he told her. He took a quick sip of his flask and tapped his wand on his leg, almost as if it was a nervous tick, but Lily wasn't stupid. She knew he was probably signaling someone.

"I can, I am, I did," Lily explained with a smile. She glanced up at the sky for a second. Closing her eyes. She could hear the snap of folks aparating in the area, she focused on it. She opened her eyes to see that Chuck wasn't alone. Draco was there, not looking pleased, along with Damon, Brody the guard was there, but Sharity wasn't. Instead, her cousin Rose was there, and Lily's wheels got to turning. The flasks, she'd seen Albus with one and she concentrated hard on that. She could picture her father in her head, faded and distant but for the first time him from a memory she knew there'd be no record of, when she was a small girl.

"Lily," Draco warned carefully as he took a step forward. Lily put her hand up for a second, gasping for breath as the memory sharpened on its own. Lily didn't fight it, or encourage it. She just breathed through the pain it was causing in her head as the neurons recreated their connection for that one memory.

"When I was a little girl, maybe thirteen or fourteen, my father and I were talking at home after visiting my mother. He was in their room and he was emptying his pockets, and he placed upon the dresser a silver flask. An Auror's flask," Lily told them as she started to move backwards slightly. She glanced around to see that there were a fair few people there, but they all seemed to be witches or wizards, and no muggles. She narrowed her eyes.

Her plan had been to storm the ministry to get answers as to why they were avoiding her, but instead she found the people she most needed to talk to, sans the minister himself, were closing in on her fast and she knew she couldn't out run them.

"Lily, how about you and I go get some coffee," Rose offered at Draco's nudging. Lily smirked.

"Something tells me that you'd not fill in any blanks, cousin," Lily accused lightly.

"Sure, we could talk all about that fateful coffee break after I went maternity shopping for Tabby," Rose promised. Lily looked at her skeptically.

"My dad told me what the Auror flasks are for, why Aurors carry them," Lily continued without responding to her cousin. "Oh, I'm sure he didn't mean to tell me. I asked what he kept in it, and he winked at me like he did when he was telling me a joke, and told me that an Auror never knew when he might need a bit of Poly Juice to get out of a sticky spot."

"Lily, let's go talk to the minister," Draco offered reaching his hand out and Lily took another step back. "He'll be pleased to hear that your memories are returning."

"Nice try, Draco," Lily laughed. She closed her eyes for a second, picturing where she wanted to go. She'd never tried this, not without a wand, but she knew that there was a first for everything.

"Lily," Draco snapped loudly. Lily opened her eyes to see that they were moving closer.

"The very thing I remember about my dead brother is that Potters should NEVER trust a Malfoy," Lily smirked. With a crack, she was gone. She landed roughly and fell to the ground, scraping her hand on a rock as she caught herself. She knew it they'd be right behind her once they realized what she'd done. She stepped a few steps to the left and aparated again, each time moving a little before sending herself hurtling through time and space until she was completely drained.

She had bounced all over the place, but settled back in London not far from where she'd left. She pulled out the flask she'd swiped from Damon when she's pushed him on to the elevator. She may not have had all her memories, but some things, some skills one never forgot. She knew she needed to get out of her clothes, and she needed to get out of her skin. She still had the credit card, but she knew that she could be traced with it. She went to a cash machine, taking out a few hundred pounds in several transactions before it locked up and denied her any more. She stuffed the money in her bag and dropped the card in the first rubbish bin, in case Draco had it marked with a tracer.

She headed into the first shop she came to and got nondescript clothing, ditching the skirt and shirt for something a little more stealthy and blending in with her peers out there on the street. She paid in with cash, changed in a back alley and took a swig of the potion, remembering to place a hair of the clerk in it first. She felt her body shift and change, her legs lengthening until she was a few inches taller than she'd started. The clothes she'd picked out almost seemed too small, the skirt riding up until it barely covered her rear end. Lily touched the shiny red leather, her bra seemed to be stretched to the max and her breasts were barely contained in the red leather vest. She caught a glimpse of herself in the reflection of the store front window, the sun setting behind her. She looked like what she always feared she was, a tart.

Across the street, she glimpsed her brother and Draco come out of the shadows and she turned her back towards them to apply lipstick as red as the boots on her feet. She stored the rest of her money in the red leather bag and ditched her purse. To anyone who passed her, she was a shiny leather clad prostitute. She doubled back around, ignoring a few of the propositions she'd received and only leaning in on an open window to chat it up when one of the Aurors got too close for comfort.

She headed back to her apartment, certain that by now Damon had to be back. She stared up at the outside, seeing a light on in both her and his apartments. They were probably looking through hers to find out exactly how much she remembered. She knew that even dressed as a hooker, there was no way that they'd just let her walk up to his apartment on the fourth floor. She looked at the fire escape and dreaded it. She wondered if she had enough of wandless magic to aparate up there, but decided against it. If she needed to make a hasty retreat, she wanted to make sure she had enough in her.

She took a giant swig of the poly juice potion, hoping that she could convince him to come to her side in less than an hour or to at least fill in the blanks in that much time. She knew that when they caught her, and she knew that they would, she was going to be in serious trouble. She could only hope that Damon was enough on her side that he could help her. She took a deep breath, as deep as she could without popping a seam and reached up, climbing carefully on the rubbish bin to reach the ladder. She glanced down at her boobs and knew she'd miss them most of all of the polyjuice. Her too long nails, not so much.

Her arms were used to moving around her sized body, she found, and she was able to climb up without much difficulty. She nearly fell only once when her knee high red leather boot slipped on one of the rungs, but she recovered and she made it to the fourth floor emergency landing. She paused by the window, finishing all but the last sip from the flask then tapped her nails on the window pane. She waited, then tapped again a little louder. It took forever, but Damon's face appeared behind the glass and curtain. He hesitated.

"Open the window and let me in," Lily told him in what she hoped came off as a sultry voice. She doubt that even if she could remember all of her life before, she was a sultry kind of girl. She could see herself being more of the giggly, almost embarrassed kind of flirting that was so bad that it was funny. Damon's eyes were wide with surprise but he complied, sliding the window open and stepping back.

"Who are you?" he asked as Lily climbed through the window. Lily flipped her waist-long blond hair behind her.

"A friend sent me," Lily offered with what she hoped came off as a sexy smile. "Thought you might be lonely and need a little entertaining."

"Blonds aren't my thing," Damon replied stiffly. "Any friend of mine would know that."

"This isn't my real hair," Lily stepped forward. She was as tall as he was now, eye to eye in height. Not that it mattered. He wasn't looking at her eyes, rather the bulging shirt. "Plus, in the dark you can't tell I'm a blond."

"Ah," Damon swallowed as she rolled her shoulders slightly her back starting to ache a little from the extra top weight. He looked at her.

"Plus, your friend was very generous with me in hopes I'd be very generous with you," Lily rambled as she ran her fingernails across his shoulders. She glanced down at the master bed and pushed him ever so gently. She was almost disappointed that he went back against it easily.

"My friend?" Damon asked as Lily, polyjuiced into this tall, blond hooker in red leather, straddled his lap.

"Mhmm..." Lily murmured, dipping herself down so that her mouth was as close to his as possible without actually touching him. She glanced to the side table to see that he'd so foolishly left his wand just laying there. He groaned softly as she pressed down on him with her body. "You're a big, big boy aren't you?"

"You tell me," he groaned. He raised his hips up roughly, almost slamming into her when he connected with her body. Lily gasped, her hands going to his hips, gripping them firmly to hold him in place as the rush of a not so distant memory flooded over her.

"Ah," Lily moaned softly in her own soft voice as his hands touched her intimately. She ignored him, what he was doing in his haste to remove their clothing while she remained frozen, locked in the pleasure of a memory less than a year old, a memory that Damon himself had given her.

"C'mere," Damon linked his hand behind her head, dragging her mouth down to his. He kissed her and that was the damn that seemed to break. Suddenly, she wanted this. She wanted more. With his every touch, a rush of another memory. She stole a peek at him as he finished disrobing, her body aching in ways that she knew could have only been knowledge of that body. She leaned back breaking another kiss with him.

Once the potion wore off, he'd probably pull away and call the Calvary, and Lily knew that she'd never have another moment with him. The ministry had made their position clear on the subject, though Lily didn't know or understand why. She had only suspicions. Something to do with the son she still didn't remember with the man she didn't remember, and all controlled by Draco. Draco and the minister. Damon watched her carefully as she unlaced the leather top slowly. Part of her wanted to jump his bones without wasting time, the other part wanted her to wait. She knew that it wouldn't be too much longer. A glance at the clock proved that the hour was almost up.

She stood, walking over to the door and locking it. He watched, his eyebrow raised slightly. He, too glanced at the clock before returning his attention as she stood by the light switch, hand hovering over it. He smile at her, almost knowingly, and Lily's heart raced as she let the last of her clothes fall away and turned out the light.

"In the dark, we can be anyone, do anyone," Lily whispered as she climbed back into the bed with him. She kissed him, pulling away only for the briefest moment her body returning to her normal form, the lat of the poly juice wearing off as rapidly as it had kicked in, before she met his mouth again. He pulled her close, edging in slowly to the very depths of her soul. He was a musician, her body an instrument, and he was a master of the chords.

She edged closer to the summit of the mountain of knowledge. She knew it. Should feel the race of her heart, the synapses firing, the rush of adrenaline and passion searing her veins. He kissed her again, this time was with more feeling than she could have ever imagined a kiss could be, and certainly more than he had when the lights were on. Lily fought the urge to cry out, to release. Every single memory of Damon crashed down on her at once, in such crystal clarity that she couldn't hold on anymore. She leaned back, tossing her hair back as his hands gripped and guided her hips and she cried out loud enough that she was certain her ancestors heard her.


	18. Chapter Seventeen

**Disc.:** My plot.

* * *

**Chapter Seventeen**

She collapsed on his chest, unable to move. Draco, the Aurors, everyone could storm the room wands blazing and she didn't care. She had every indication of just extracting whatever information she could, but she didn't think she'd actually sleep with him. Sure, he was good looking, and he had told her that they'd had history, but still she never thought she'd actually go through with sleeping with someone she didn't know or remember. Not that it mattered anymore, she not only had, she remembered everything about him, every interaction in precise clarity. Some of the memories there was a third person, that person wasn't clear to her, but she knew that she was closer.

He stroked her hair, stopping at her shoulders like he'd know her hair didn't go to her waist. She closed her eyes for a moment, knowing that one of them needed to say something. It was obvious. She listened to his breathing for a few moments, the two of them still connected quiet intimately. She knew he hadn't been her first, even if she couldn't remember the rest of them, but he had been the last. He eased out of her, laying her gently to his side.

"I'm sorry," he whispered in to ear.

"Don't be," Lily told him.

"I should have stayed away from you, all along," he told her quietly as she edged closer to him. "The temptation was too great."

"Why Argentina?" Lily asked him.

"The thought of not having you in my life, Lily," he nestled his face into her neck. "I've grown incredibly selfish."

"Did you know it was me the whole time?" Lily sighed. He chuckled.

"Only you could come dressed up with poly juice and whore boots, and still drip of innocents," Damon kissed her mouth. He pulled away with a sigh. "I should stop. You should stop me."

"Why? I care about you, you care about me," she protested.

"You don't love me, not like you love him," he tried to put a little space between them. She curled against him.

"I don't even remember him," Lily frowned in the dark. "You, I remember in almost painful clarity, but he's still nothing more than fuzz and haze."

"Trust me when I say that he is the love of your life," Damon groaned as she tilted her head back to look at him. He flipped the beside light on but looked not at her but the ceiling. She placed her hand on his cheek gently, guiding his face to look at her. "Lily, don't do this."

"I can't imagine being with anyone else," she breathed as she kissed him again. Someone started pounding on the bedroom door, startling them both.

"Hey man, you in there?" a very masculine voice called out from the other side of the door. Lily's head whipped toward the door. Something in his voice called to her, something deep and primitive. She looked back at Damon, her obvious confusion evident in her eyes.

"Who's that?" she whispered. Damon was already untangling from her, pulling Lily to her feet.

"It doesn't matter right now, Lily, but you have to go!" Damon whispered to her. "You can't be found in here."

"Hey, Damon? You okay in there? Why's the door locked?"

"I'm heading into the shower," Damon called out loudly, almost gruffly as he pulled a shirt free of the dresser and pulled it over Lily's head. She quickly stepped back into her skirt and cinched it on her much smaller frame.

"You're about to take a shower when Lily is Merlin knows where doing who knows what with whom, with half of her memory gone because of us?" he demanded through the door as he jiggled the door handle. Lily round on him frowning.

"Us?" she mouthed to him.

"Later," he mouthed back as he directed her toward the window. She frowned deeper, stepping through the window. She turned back to look at him and he ducked under the window sash and kissed her, one last toe-curling kiss before closing the window and curtains, turning just as the bedroom door opened.

"Man, everyone knows how proud you are that you're hung like an elephant, but do you have parade around with it all hanging out?" Scorpius asked as he quickly looked away from his best mate. Damon scooped up a pair of shorts, pulling them on and flipping his covers back over his bed but not before Scorpius saw the evidence of Damon's loving on the bed.

"About to shower my butt. Lily's out there all alone and you're in here, polishing you wand so to speak," Scorpius accused frowning as he turned around and headed toward the bedroom door. "The ministry's summoning all Aurors, about the search for Lily." There was a crash outside the window, down near the rubbish bins.

"People need to keep their cats inside at night," Damon exclaimed as he directed Scorpius back into the living room.

Lily wanted nothing more than to sneak back into her own apartment to get better fitting clothes. One of her boots had slipped down her leg and fallen off, crashing below. She took the second one off and threw it as far as she could. She knew that she could probably slip into the master bedroom and at least put on underwear that fit, not these that were trying to slide down.

Lily found herself climbing through the second window of the night, tumbling with a thump to the ground. She paused, half expecting someone to storm the room with wands blazing. She pulled herself off the ground, heading to the shower to clean the grime of the day in the city and the after love of being with Damon. She stood in the shower, the too warm water pouring over her, humming some tune that seemed almost painfully familiar.

She rung the water out of her hair, pulling a big bath towel around her body as she stepped out of the en suite, coming up short to the man who stood in the doorway of her bedroom. If she was surprised to see him standing there, he was even more surprised.

"Lily?" Scorpius asked cautiously. He didn't make a move toward her, just stood and looked at her. She looked at the man in the doorway, framed by the glow of light coming from behind him.

"You look so much like Draco," Lily breathed. "So much like the boy."

"Lily, I'm so sorry you don't remember him. That wasn't my intention. None of this was," he explained. He extended his hand to her. "I know you don't remember, but I'm Scorpius Malfoy. We were almost married, we had a child together."

"So I've been told," Lily didn't move toward him. Rather she gripped the edge of her towel tightly, looking at him warily.

"I did this to you," he admitted.

"Did what?" Lily asked.

"I obliverated your memories," he told her apologetically.

"Why?"

"Well, it wasn't my intention to have you forget our son, or me for that matter," Scorpius explained as he leaned against the doorframe and watched her standing there.

"What was your goal, then?" she demanded.

"I wanted you to forget Damon," he frowned at his own words.

"Forget Damon? You mean forget the one man who didn't abandon me?" Lily snapped at him. She turned away from him and marched to her dresser, pulling out a pair of jeans and a shirt, laying them out on her made bed.

"I didn't abandon you, Lily," Scorpius protested.

"I wouldn't know," Lily shrugged. She gestured for him to turn around so she could dress. He hesitated, fighting whatever urges he had, before complying. She glanced at him, his back to her, and she wondered if she had really loved him as much as everyone claimed she had. She knew it'd been 10 years, but only because that's what people had said. She'd moved on, first with Marshall, though she couldn't really remember that, and then again with Damon most recently, who she did remember.

"Can I turn around?" he asked.

"I guess," Lily scratched at her elbow nervously.

"I can't even begin to tell you how much I've missed you," Scorpius told her. Lily fought and lost against a grin.

"I can't either," Lily joked. He smirked, that famous Malfoy smirk that she'd seen on Draco, seen on the boy who was her son, and seen in the pictures. She couldn't deny that it was something that caused butterflies in her stomach. She could imagine that she must have really loved this man, she could understand that.

"Honestly, if I had known that it'd have removed your memories of our son... I didn't know. I was just trying to make you not love Damon, I didn't know how much of him was intertwined in your being in Argentina, how much of our son would have been involved," Scorpius offered. "That and what the minister of magic did to you, we removed those memories, Damon and I. Never in a million years did we think it'd erase almost everyone from you."

"That's kind of sucked quite a bit," Lily admitted with a nod.

"I'm so sorry, Lily," Scorpius hung his head a little bit, and Lily felt bad for him. She knew that she shouldn't, he was the one who had set this whole thing in motion, but the tender side of her had her crossing the room slowly. She stopped about an arms' length from him.

"I want to say that it's okay, or that I understand, but it's not and I don't," Lily confessed. He looked at her, surprised to see that she had moved towards her. She frowned, sad. "If you could have seen the look on that little boy's face when I turned to him, and basically told him he was nothing to me."

"Lily, I'm so sorry," Scorpius sighed, looking away.

"I still don't remember him. I've not seen him, not sense they carried him away, kicking and screaming," Lily's voice broke and he looked back at her face.

"I've seen him," Scorpius admitted. "The ministry decided that the boy deserved at least one parent. They pulled me off my mission and brought me home."

"How is he?"

"He's really good. He talks about you all the time," Scorpius shared. He looked at her, silent for a moment. "You've done an amazing job with him. You can tell that you are his world."

"I'm sure he was mine, too," Lily replied with a half smile, wiping away a tear. She turned away from him, walking back toward the window she'd come through. She closed and locked it. She wasn't going to act like a child and run. She wouldn't demand from the ministry anything. If things could come back for her slowly, or be encouraged to rush, like with Damon, she'd let it come.

"Do you remember anything?" he asked her as he moved into the room. She ran her fingers over the things on the dresser, hesitating on small boxes and tracing the designs on them.

"Sometimes, I catch wisps of memories, but it's like trying to catch smoke with your hands," Lily explained, leaning against the dresser to look at him. She cupped her hands and then opened them, still empty. "No matter how hard I try, they're ever elusive."

"No one's offered to help you remember?" Scorpius asked. Lily grinned.

"Oh, some have for sure," Lily told him. "Draco, for one, offered to try Legimancy but Marhall Clocks shot it down."

"Marshall's still in your life?" Scorpius frowned.

"Yeah, apparently he and I had a go of it, too," Lily offered flippantly with a shrug. "Not that it matters. I don't remember if he was any good or not."

"I hate that guy," Scorpius growled. Lily laughed.

"And Damon, do you hate him, too?" Lily asked after she regained her composure. "You obviously knew I was with him."

"Damon is like a brother to me, was like a brother to me," Scorpius explained. "I won't lie. It hurt when it got back to me that the one thing I asked him not to do, he did."

"You didn't see how much he missed you, Scorpius," Lily defended.

"So he sleeps with my girl?" he challenged skeptically.

"They made me believe that you were dead and gone," Lily snapped at him. "I don't know when you stopped talking with Damon, but my bringing Theron-" Lily froze. The memory of Damon being upset over Theron came flooding over her. She gripped the dresser. Less painfully, the memory of that night eased in, untwisting and unfurling in her.

"Are you okay?" Scorpius asked as he reached for her. She tried to take a step back but was already backed against the dresser. She held on to the memories of the little boy that she'd raised from her body into the boy who was probably lost and frightened without her well, each one slowly coming into focus. The very though tore her heart into pieces.

"Damon tried to fight his feelings," Lily choked out. "I'm the one who encouraged it, the one who sabotaged everything. I'm the one that went to him that night. He protested, of course, but I knew by then how he felt about me and I was so lonely."

"Lily," Scorpius looked pained.

"So, if you must be mad at someone for what happened, be mad at me," she demanded. She stepped toward him, grabbing his arm with her small hand. Electricity seemed to shoot through him, the jolt rocking him back half a step.

"I could never be mad at you," he told her. She looked up at him. "Trust me, it would feel so much better to be able to blame someone other than myself."

"Why did you remove yourself from my memories?" Lily asked him, still holding on to him.

"That wasn't my intention," Scorpius frowned. He pulled free of her, walking toward the edge of her bed. He took a seat. "The minister did horrible, horrible things. I didn't realize that when Damon and I went to remove them so close to my removing memories of Damon, that it'd cause a chain reaction. It's the only thing that the specialists could come up with as to why some memories crumbled and were destroyed where some remained."

"Have you ever done anything like that before?" she asked him. He shook his head.

"No, I mean they train us to, and during training they let us practice on prisoners, but never unguided," he offered her. "I just wanted to take away all that pain and suffering the minister caused you trying to steal your secrets."

"Well, you can count that a success," Lily shared. "I don't remember much of Argentina."

"But you do remember some?" he asked her. She nodded, sitting on the bed next to him.

"Yeah," she shared. "I don't remember all of the reasons that I went there. I remember my brother pressing me to go on holiday, and Damon leaving me the postcard."

"You got my other post cards, and he piggy backed on that, huh?" Scorpius frowned.

"There were other? Oh, of course there must have been," Lily sighed.

"I only hoped that they'd let you know that I missed you, that I still cared even if I couldn't be there for you," Scorpius offered as he folded his hands in his lap. He focused on her own hands clutching the hem of her tee shirt.

"I don't know what might have happened to those," Lily murmured absentmindedly.

"You handed them over to the Aurors, and they knew that I was trying to contact the outside," Scorpius explained. "I was in so deep, I couldn't find a way out. I'm sure that my father didn't mean for any of us to get hurt, this plan wasn't supposed to take any time at all. James and I were supposed to get in and get out, only he got hurt, died, and I was trapped."

"My brother died," Lily confirmed with a slight nod. She could vaguely remember him dying in her arms, though it was distant enough that it felt more like she'd watched someone else suffer.

"It got back to me," Scorpius frowned. "I only survived by the grace of Poly Juice and a scalp full of one of the minister's thugs. He wasn't the first person I'd killed, but I did feel bad about it."

"Thug..." Lily looked like she was in deep though. She vaguely remembered someone tall, with thick hands and a drinking problem. "The Spanish Auror?"

"Yes," he nodded at her.

"It's all like trying to look through a foggy looking glass," Lily's voice was etched with frustration.

"Will you share with me what you do remember?" Scorpius asked her. She glanced up at him. He looked so sad, so broken. She wondered if the truth would set him free or be the final blow.

"Sometimes, I remember little bits and flashes of things. Before I would try to grab at them, and they'd disintegrate under my fingers," Lily offered him. She didn't try to smile. "I'm starting to remember Theron, I remember parts of his upbringing that you weren't there, the parts I'm assuming you were there, is hazy. I remember whispered words and hints of touches we shared, but they're still unfocused."

"What about Damon?" he asked her hesitantly. Lily met his eyes guiltily, able to clearly see the hurt in his gray steel eyes.

"I went to him, once I found out that he and I had a history," Lily whispered softly. He froze, a frown marring his face.

"Went to him?" Scorpius pushed. Lily squirmed.

"I didn't know you were alive or back or even existed other than by what people told me, Scorpius. Even now, I can't be sure that I'm not just trapped in some delusion or under some sort of spell thought up by the ministry," Lily growled at him as she clenched her fists by her side. She jumped up and started pacing the room in quick, angry steps. "So yeah, I went to him. I drank poly juice that I stole, and I went to him. I snuck in his bedroom window and I went to him. I didn't fight my feelings, I won't let anyone make me feel bad for being attracted to him or to you or to anyone!"

"What?"

"He tried to turn me down, so your bro-hood should still count for something," Lily snapped at him angrily.

"He tried to turn you down?"

"Yeah, isn't that swell? After all this time, his friendship with you meant more than his love for me," Lily's tone was bitter. "Oh, he gave in. Don't delude yourself into thinking that he didn't. But he did try to turn away from me. Ten years changes a person, Scorpius. Ten years a long time for me to sit by idly mourning you. So yeah, he tried to suppress his love for me, but I wouldn't let him."

"You make it sound like you forced him," he said coolly.

"Basically, I didn't take no for an answer," Lily crossed her arms.

"So, you remember him then? Just like that?" Scorpius choked out, snapping his finger once. She looked at him.

"Don't you think for a moment I'd give up a chance to remember you that way," she told him. She wrapped her arms around herself, shaking. "I'm told by everyone that you are the LOVE of my life, Scorpius. I looked back at all the pictures of us, and you've been in my life for a very long time. I feel so strongly about Damon right now, and he's in so few of my earlier pictures, and only dotted in the older ones. Can you even imagine how it feels to feel so strongly about Damon and know that there is some else out there that I felt even more strongly about? Someone I can't remember?"

"Lily, I-" he groaned softly. Lily marched over to him, grabbing his hand and jerked him off the bed. She drug him into the main living room, not realizing that there were other people in there that looked very much surprised to see her there. She didn't notice them, just reached up and grabbed Scorpius by the face between her thumb and finger, directing his face to the portrait.

"Do you see this? I don't remember this, but that look on their faces, OUR faces, how could anyone deny what has been said, that you ARE the love of my life," Lily complained angrily. "YOU, not Damon, not Marshall, not anyone else. YOU. YOU ARE the love of my LIFE, and I don't remember you. How can you sit there, look at me, and think that I wouldn't give up heaven and earth to be able to LOVE YOU the way I must have at one time."

"Lily?" Albus' voice startled her and she turned, barefoot, in her living room to see that there were a fair few Aurors that had entered either from one of the back rooms or the wide-open front door undetected by Lily. Damon was standing there in the kitchen, leaning against the counter. His face was an emotionless mask.

"Lily," Draco's voice was calm. The minister was there with him. "Lily, let go of Scorpius, please." Lily immediately dropped her hands from his body, keeping them by her side. She fought the urge to cross her arms against her body, but she felt very cornered. Her previous body guards were there, Sharity, Chuck, and Brody, though none of them looked very comfortable. She wondered if they'd gotten into trouble for her running off on them.

Knowing the ministry, and she didn't exactly have a lot of memories of it, they probably had been punished or would be soon enough. She frowned as she realized that they were creeping closer to her, slowly as if she were a rabid animal that needed to be handled with care. It wasn't too far from the truth. She felt like a cornered animal, their wands all trained on her.

"I'm unarmed," she snapped at them.

"Protocol," Draco told her quietly. "Put your hands out, palms facing up please."

"Why?" Lily demanded as she took a step away from Scorpius.

"Lily Luna Potter, by the order of the ministry, and as the minister, I hereby charge you with assault on Aurors, evading, and treason," the minister announced. Draco drew shackles with his wand, the metal appearing and locking down on Lily's wrists. She looked at him, her mouth drawn in a grim line. "Until trial, you will be held at Azkaban Prison."

"Wait, what?" a few of the Aurors were outraged, including Damon and Scorpius. Lily just stood there, staring at the minister. Frown on her face.

"Take her away," the minister demanded. Brody stepped forward, taking her arm, his wand pressed against the fabric of her white tee shirt. Chuck took the other side, same position. "And this time, it will be your jobs if you lose her."

Lily glanced back the rest of them as she was marched out of her apartment. She dug her heel in, kissing her hands and directing them to the minister almost sweetly menacing.

"Don't worry, Minister Parker," Lily threatened. "I'll be seeing you real soon."


	19. Chapter Eighteen

**Dis.:** My plot, still.

* * *

**Chapter Eighteen**

Five months had passed behind the bars and stone walls. She had a tiny window, barely big enough to look out of with both her eyes at the same time. There was nothing more than a small drain in the floor to use for calls of nature, no privacy. She paced the ten by ten room, kicking up dust and straw that was too measly to even form into a pillow. She shivered at night now, pulling her arms into her tee shirt to try and stay warm. The summer had been quite the opposite with her nearly removing her shirt to cool off. The food was served once a day, a grayish lumpy sludge served in dirty bowls, attached to a chain. Five minutes a day, the bowl were slid between the bars, the inhabitants would all dive to the bowls, scooping at the food with their hands into their mouths. The lucky could choke it all down before the chains retracted and took away the sustenance until the next day. The only thing that seemed plentiful was water, that leaked from pipes over head or pooled in the stones by the windows. It seemed to always rain, always be dark and dirty.

The screaming used to put her on edge. She had been tempted to join in their howling after a while, when it looked as if the ministry had no plan of actually bringing her to trial. She had held off going completely off the deep end, using a bit of sharp edge on one of the bars to knick her finger and keep track of the days as they came and went. She walked the cell several times an hour, determined to not lay down and wither away like some of the other prisoners. She tried chatting with the neighbors she could see across the hall from her, but they had been in for too long and there was nothing left behind their flat, expressionless eyes. Lily felt sorry for them, determined to fight until her last breath, but sorry for them.

She used that sorrow and hopelessness when the dementors would come by, letting that bit of panic go unchecked as they floated down the walkways. It kept them from hesitating too long at her door, the only thing that seemed to be shimmery, silvery white in this dreadful place. She remembered a little bit of why, a patronus charm interwoven with the bars to keep them out, unless of course the minister passed down the order for a kiss. The very possibility that he could do such with her had her heart pounding every time she saw them, and she saw them several times a day.

She'd hear the prisoners at the far end start their horror-filled screams and she'd stop pacing her cell like a caged animal. She'd lay down against the crack between the floor and back wall, curling up as small as she could, allowing the panic of what could happen well up in her. In her mind, she used it as a weapon against the dementors, pushing that fear and panic out in a shield between her and them. They'd pass after only a pause and continue on, the prisoners would quiet to just sobs or cries and Lily would stand back up and begin pacing again. She wouldn't let inactivity lead to atrophy.

The too few calories had her losing weight until she looked almost sick, but it wasn't her only body needs that seemed to have her hips sharpen and her shoulders start to show. She stretched her body as much as she could, running her hand down the now baggy tee shirt, frowning. Oh, there was more to her body starving itself. The flat plane of her stomach bulged slightly. Lily frowned as she cradled her body in her hands, unwilling to cry over it. What should have never been was, and from the movement inside her, the baby was thriving.

When Lily first suspected, she was angry. Angry that a higher being would allow this knowing that the last time had nearly killed her and that she wouldn't be able to do it again, to get pregnant and carry. The healers had all shared with her their sorrow for her, a mother whose body wouldn't work. She thought of the baby that she and Scorpius would have had, if things had been different. That child would be ten now, maybe, and getting ready for school soon. She would think of what this would do to Theron, who had begged for a sibling to play with until Lily sat down and explained exactly where her body failed in that very thing.

At night, she curled around her stomach, first when it was just a suspicion. She'd known that stress could stop normal functions, and if anyone was stressed, it was she. She stayed in denial at first, thinking back to when a healer had told her that they had tried to save her fertility, but the baby had ruptured the tube and it was gone. She assumed that was the end of it, they sure seemed to think it was the end of it. The other one had been severed during her c-section with Theron when he twisted during their incision. They'd realized it only after a while, when they'd started to sew her back up.

She refused to think of what anyone would say, or how it would affect anyone else. She debated telling them to see if they'd bring her more food or bring her to trial sooner, but no one even came to check on her. Even if she had wanted to use it in a bargaining chip, she couldn't. She just watched as her body shrank and he belly bloated. Even with as gross as the gray mush was, she made sure that she got every single morsel choked down. She would give it a fighting chance. She paced. She stayed hydrated by the dripping water. She protected herself from the dementors. She counted down the days and weeks and months.

_'November,'_ she thought as she curled up for the night, tucking her arms in her shirt and wrapping them around her rounding stomach. She made a point of pulling her knees up as high as she could, determined to keep the baby warm even as she shivered. _'Theron is in his second year. He is a good boy. He loves me. He has a father. His name is Scorpius. He is a good man. He loves me. You are my baby. Your father loves me. If we ever get out of this, if we both make it, it's going to be really interesting living in the same building.'_

She slept when she could stop shivering long enough to sleep, would run her connections by in her head. Hazier memories were starting to sharpen slightly. She could almost remember what it was to be touched and kissed by Scorpius. She mentally kicked herself for not remembering to kiss him before they took her. She knew that he was taking care of their son, she owed him that much. She'd been away from her son for over a year now, sans that one disastrous visit when she was in the hospital.

With her being malnourished, she was smaller than she'd probably have been if she had enough to eat. She could feel the stretching and movement of the baby as it grew. She cradled the mound, tracing shapes against her skin as it covered and protected her baby. She would trace her ribs to keep track of how much weight she was really losing in the prison cell. Sometimes, she'd let a few precious tears streak down her cheek in the middle of the night when she thought about how much she had lost, and when she worried she'd never find out why.

The screaming always started up, the shrieks and indistinguishable shouts of the caged prisoners, the wails and wants deafening. Lily covered her ears in the morning to block it out, needed a few more minutes to rest. She was growing so tired, so weak. She worried about her body-mate, the baby wasn't as active anymore, the food wasn't providing enough calories for either of them, much less both of them. She pushed up off the cold hard floor and turned over, rubbing her stomach to warm the chill from her.

"Hey, you," a voice called. It was deep, resonating and it sounded too loud, much too loud. Lily didn't dare hope that they'd sent someone else here who still had their wits about them. She curled up tighter, ignoring the ankle shackles they'd failed to remove when she was placed in the cell. She glanced at the wall. It had been five months. It was almost December. She hear a key in a lock and her heart strummed in her chest. Maybe the ministry had decided to have the trial without her, and the punishment put down was a kiss. She fought the tears that were edging out of her eyes, curling up tighter.

The metal on metal of a rarely used door creaked so loudly that the other prisoners drew silent. Door rarely opened in this place, usually only to put people in, to take the dead out, or to administer the kiss. Lily clenched her eyes shut, unable to make herself any smaller. She heard the trays of food shoot into each of the cell but she didn't dare move, hunger or not. She couldn't risk it.

"I want photos taken of all this!" a man barked at someone. Lily flinched at his too close voice, clenched her teeth and twitched as the flash fired over and over. She shuddered slightly, the smell of flash powder hanging thickly in the cool, damp air. She felt someone move behind her, a hand touch her shoulder lightly.

"Mr. Green, I think you need to take a look at her," a woman's voice cut into Lily's heart, its sweet cadence almost reminding her of a mother. "Miss Potter, I'm Susan Anderson, personal assistant to Mr. Green, you're attorney."

Lily turned her tear and dirt streaked face.

"Take the picture," Mr. Green demanded and the flash made Lily cringe and jump. Mr. Green dropped down, careful not to dirty his pristine dragon skin suit to look at her. "Lily, I'm sorry that it's taken so long to get in to see you. The ministry has been rather, uncooperative, especially with so many political opponents coming up against Minister Parker."

She didn't say anything, just remained curled in a ball.

"I think the poor thing is in shock, and starved," Susan said as she glanced at the meager portion of gray slop in the bowl.

"We're going to take you to the city, to be held until your trial in two weeks. You'd have been there sooner but convieniently, the minister lost your paperwork and no one could find you," Mr. Green told her. "Can you stand? Can you walk out of here?" Lily nodded once, the two backing up as Lily struggled to her feet.

"Merlin," Susan whispered in horror, looking at Lily. Mr. Green closed his eyes in what looked like silent prayer.

"I want you take a few more pictures of Miss Potter, please," he told the camera guy. He looked truly upset. Lily flinched, focusing out the window and the small patch of blue sky as the flash fired off a few more times.

"Miss Potter," Susan offered her arm, sliding it around one side of her, Mr. Green on the other side. Gone was his concern for dirt, but instead the suffering of this woman. He nodded at the camera man who took one final picture, two robust ministry officials with an emaciated and pregnant woman limply draped between them.

Lily barely could hope that this was actually happening, tears streaming down her face. Perhaps, she'd finally died or completely been lost to her mind. She didn't try to wipe the tears away, or to hide her body away. She turned her face up to the sun just beyond the door, the warm warming her despite the breeze, causing her tears to almost sparkle in the sun. The camera guy decided to take the picture without any prompting from Mr. Green.

"Lily, we're going to stick it to them," Mr. Green promised. One of the transport guards looked startled by Lily's appearance, shackles in his hand to cuff her wrist. Mr. Green glared at him. "No, and I daresay you'd better remove the ones on her ankles too. The level of abuse in this penitentiary, especially for someone who has never even been arraigned is deplorable."

"Yes, of course," the guard dipped down, unlocking the metal and it fell away at her feet before disappearing for good. Lily didn't try to stop the tears. Dead or not, she was in the warm sun, and she didn't care anymore.

Lily remained quiet and jumpy on the small boat that seemed to travel very quickly through the water. She had seen boats, she reminded herself silently, in Argentina, but they had been muggle boats. The magical boats at the castle had moved much in the same way, as if the water and weather weren't a factor. No one talked to her, or to each other. Mr. Green was furiously writing notes, his quill making scratching noises on the parchment. Lily didn't watch him, instead she looked out over the water. She lowered her hand into the water, peering over the edge of the small dinghy. The salt water felt pure on her skin, she scooped it up to drink from it but Mr. Green pushed her hands away from her mouth, spilling the water.

"Don't drink that," he told her gently. He conjured a carafe of ice cold water and a glass. She ignored the glass and chugged the cold water, finishing it almost immediately and shuddering from the brief chill. "Do you want more?"

Lily shook her head and looked back out over the water, a mouthful of water still sloshing around in her mouth. It didn't have that bitter tang of sulfur that the water from the rocks and pipes had. It was the purest thing she had drank in ages. Susan touched her arm slightly, Lily flinched.

"Sorry, dear. I didn't mean to startle you. When we dock, Mr. Green and I will take you to the ministry. We'll make sure that there is plenty of clean water to drink and food, okay?" Susan promised.

"Lily, we will make this right," Mr. Green promised. He glanced down for a moment at her shirt, the stained and tattered ratty gray thing nearly thread bare. "No one should ever have to go through what you've been through."

Lily was too overwhelmed and exhausted as she was shuttled from the dock into a waiting car. The windows were dark tinted, so that with the dying day and the coming night, Lily could open her eyes more effectively without squinting or them hurting. They slowed as they approached the ministry, Lily stared aimlessly out the window unseeing.

"Those protestors are here for you," Susan whispered. Lily glanced briefly at the mass of people, holding signs where moving posters of Lily being taken out of her building five months before at wand-point were displayed. "Everyone knows you were arrested, but no one knows why and as time passed, it became apparent that the ministry was attempting to cover it up and hide you away."

The cell reminded Lily more of her first apartment she'd gotten after she left the big one. She tried to remember why she'd left, drawing a blank. She had been pregnant, and her friend had helped out with furniture, but Lily was drawing a blank on the finer details. She was too tired to care.

"Susan is going to sleep on the couch here, Lily," Mr. Green said. "I have my own personal guards stationed outside so that you don't have to worry about anything."

"Thank you," Lily whispered, her voice creaky from the lack of use. The baby stirred wildly at the sound of her voice.

"I'm going to send for a healer in the morning," Mr. Green promised. "Do you have any in mind? I'm going to guess that you didn't go in there knowing about your, er, condition?"

"No," Lily shook her head once. A healer came to mind, Marshall Clocks, but she didn't know if she could trust him, trust anyone. She glanced at Susan and Mr. Green, and wondered if she could trust either of them.

"I'll find you someone," he told her. He pulled Susan aside to talk with her and Lily wandered to the bedroom. She looked at the bed, the fluffy blankets and the thick pillows, and ached to climb in between the pristine white linens. Susan came up beside her and pulled out clothes for Lily.

"The tub is over that way, soak away and scrub away, dear," Susan shared. "I'll order a bunch of food and have it delivered, from our own cooks, and you can eat when you're done."

Lily nodded once. She discarded her clothes in a heap on the floor. She felt ashamed for their filthiness, and even more so when she actually saw her reflection in the glass. She was sallow-skinned, bony. She counted the ribs and the vertebrae in her spin, traced her now angular bones with her skeleton fingers. Her hair was caked and matted, bits of straw and chunks of dust clinging to the grease and mess. It took her an hour of scrubbing and scouring, rinsing and repeating until the water ran clear. Lily felt disgusted by the thick layer of filth left behind and she set to work scrubbing it with bleach she found under the sink.

"Lily, honey, don't worry about it," Susan begged her as she touched the bare shoulder of the frail creature before her. Lily startled, dropping the scrubber in the tub.

"I-"

"It's okay, Lily," Susan promised. "I'll have someone come clean it. Let's dress you and feed you. You'll need your rest. I can't imagine you've slept too well the last five months."

"No, not really," Lily murmured as she eased her clothes over her body. Susan grinned at her.

"Once we get some good nutrition in you, you'll be right as rain," Susan guided her toward the living space, a cart with the most imaginable foods were laid out. Lily hesitated. After months of gray gruel, she didn't know what to chose.

"I-" Lily hesitated.

"I'd start light," Susan suggested. Lily had her fill on soups and tea, fruits and little sandwiches. She barely made it to the bed before slipping into a food coma. Lily slept straight through the next day and woke up starved. She climbed out of the bed and shuffled out of the room into the living room. Mr. Green was flipping through a book.

"I know I saw it in here," he muttered, stroking his beard. "Marvolo Gaunt got six months AFTER he was tried and sentenced for assaulting an Auror."

"Here's where Mofrin Gaunt got three years, but he did attack a bunch of muggles," Susan pointed at the book she was looking. She glanced up. "Oh, Lily! You're awake. Here, come sit and eat."

"Thank you," Lily's voice was quiet, reserved.

"We're just going over your defense," Mr. Green explained, gesturing at the tall stacks of papers in front of him. "The healer will be here in a little bit."

"Is there anything we can get you?" Susan asked as Lily tucked into the plate of foods placed before her.

"I'd like to see my son, Theron," Lily replied quietly. Susan and Mr. Green shared a look.

"I don't know that the ministry will allow it. They're calling him to the stands to testify," Mr. Green explained. "An incident of magic he and his cousins performed before he even went to school. The idea is to prove that you've got a complete disregard for Wizarding Law."

"That... that was a misunderstanding," Lily protested weakly.

"We know, and they know that, too," Mr. Green nodded. "They're just not going to make it easy on you. Two weeks, Lily. Two weeks and we'll go before the Wizengamut and plead our case. The law is on our side."

"What are my charges, my official charges?" Lily asked, playing with her food.

"Treason, though I've heard rumors that the prosecuting team can't find a single entity of it, and they've even called to witness the minister of magic from Argentina," Mr. Green explained. "The worst thing, probably is going to be Assault on Ministry Officials... Aurors."

"I didn't assault anyone," Lily protested.

"You were seen pushing Damon West into the elevator and you grabbed Scorpius Malfoy by the face," Mr. Green read from the paper, adjusting his glasses. He looked at her over them. "You also stole Auror property from Mr. West, denying him use of his property. A silver Auror-issued poly juice flask. You also are charged as impersonating another person and gaining entry to Mr. West's domicile."

"Are they bringing me up on charges?" Lily asked him. Mr. Green looked through the papers, shuffling here and there.

"It looks like the ministry has filed charges on their behalf, since they're technically property of the ministry," Mr. Green explained. "I doubt that last four charges, the theft and denial of property, the impersonation, and gaining entry will hold up, but the other two were witnessed by no less than two ministry guards."

"What am I looking at for punishment?" Lily asked after she closed her eyes for a moment, thinking. She wanted to be hysterical, to throw things, but she knew that it'd be no good.

"Six months, each charge, is Azkaban," Mr. Green said carefully. "If we're lucky, maybe 3 months each, with credit for time served."

"I can't go back there," Lily gasped.

"Of course not," Mr. Green shook his head. "We're fighting to get all the charges dropped, of course, but the ministry has to save face. They'll probably plea out before they have you go before the council, drop the treason charges and all the others, since it'd be hard to prove them, and then bargain out the two assault charges."

"Mr. Green, the healer is here," a woman informed him, poking her head in the door. Mr. Green nodded and gestured for her to allow the healer enter. Lily was grateful that she didn't know this healer. The woman healer was very nice to Lily, checking her out head to toe.

"So, what's the thought, doc?" Mr. Green asked her. She glanced at Lily.

"She's severely emaciated. She's been held in deplorable conditions for a very long time," she explained. Lily watched the quick-quotes quill rapidly going to work, writing notes. The healer was pulling together different compounds. "I suggest that she drink these reviality potions. She's very deficient in calories, and that can mean a whole host of issues to both baby and mother."

"But will she recover?" Mr. Green asked.

"She's strong," the healer offered him. She looked at Lily. "I want you to remain in bed until your court date, eating and drinking."

"We'll make sure it happens," Susan promised as she placed her hands on Lily's shoulders and directed her back to bed. Lily protested but after she'd eaten and drank the potion the healer left her, she felt incredibly tired. She yawned, a tiny squeak of noise escaping as she covered herself with the too soft blanket.

"Make sure she stays in that bed," Mr. Green warned Susan as she went to close the door over. "The healer says that the baby's very life depends on her health and healing."

"Yes sir," Susan nodded, glancing back at the door as she sat down in front of her previously discarded tomes.

"Even a delayed sentence is going to be unacceptable," Mr. Green sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose.

"Does anyone know about her... condition?" Susan asked delicately. Mr. Green shook his head, replacing his glasses.

"I plan on showing the pictures during trial," he explained. "I'm going to get that rat-bastard for everything."


	20. Chapter Nineteen

**Disc.:** My plot.

**A/N:** I think I've been watching entirely too much Law and Order at night, when there isn't much radio traffic. I think it bleeds out here.

* * *

**Chapter Nineteen**

Mr. Green placed his hand on Lily's shoulder. She looked at him with a smile, and he smiled back at her. In the two weeks of the ministry-housed holding, Lily had remained in bed except to use the restroom or clean up. Susan and she had talked a lot, mostly sticking to either the case or nothing of importance. She didn't push for information, though Lily knew that she was curious about the baby. The closest she came to even really mentioning it was during the time she felt the baby moving. She had wondered aloud, more to herself than anyone, if the father was missing out.

"We're going to do great," Mr. Green promised. "This'll be over with before you know it, and you'll be home with your son."

"Okay," Lily nodded.

"Ready?" Susan asked her.

"Do I have a choice?" Lily grinned slightly as she hoisted herself up out of the chair. She had gained quite a bit of weight in the two weeks of resting and eating. She could still feel her bones if she touched them hard enough, but with the added nutrition came a growth spurt. She looked down at her stomach, no longer able to see her toes. She wiggled them anyways. The ministry was going to love this.

Lily walked between Mr. Green, who was leading, and Susan, flanked on the sides by Mr. Green's guards. Lily was glad to be up and moving. It was hard being immobile. She caressed her stomach and Susan removed her hand. Lily dropped her hands to her sides. The whole pregnancy was going to be brought up in a spectacular witches-rights counter suit, that they were going to be requesting during opening statements. Lily followed the directions Mr. Green had prompted her. She'd sit, standing only when directed to, moving forward to the chair in the middle of the room when it was time.

Lily didn't look around. She didn't know who would be there, and the nerves would have just built if she saw a lot of people so she sat immediately in the chair next to Susan. Mr. Green took her other side. He gave her a reassuring pat on the shoulder. Lily glanced over to the minister of magic, Minister Parker, despite her better judgment. He was sitting beside Draco Malfoy, who looked very unhappy about it. The minister was looking right at her. She refused to look behind him, knowing from the chart that Theron, Scorpius, and Damon would be among the witnesses behind them. She knew she couldn't lay eyes on her son and not go to him.

Her hand twitched slightly as she went to rub her stomach and instead she leaned forward and placed them on the table, willing them to mind her. The Wizengamot filed in to their seats, Lily lost count of them and rather focused on the Chief Warlock. She had paid enough attention in school to know that typically the council leaned with the side of the Minister. She hoped for leniency.

After the official reading of the charges, the prosecution side went into their evidence that Lily had not only done what she had done, but that she had a disregard for the magical laws set forth to protect and serve them all. Lily watched, gripping the table as they marched her little boy to the stand. He focused on his hands and mumbled a lot. It broke her heart to see her son look so nervous. The minister asked him questions himself, about the incident that occurred before his first year of school. Theron answered the questions. He looked up briefly, his eyes falling on his mother. He looked so lost and Lily wanted to go to him. She felt Mr. Green's hand on her arm, a gentle reminder, and she remained sitting.

Mr. Green stood, walking around the table until he was a few feet from Theron. He looked at the boy for a minute, the steel-colored-eye boy blinking up at him. Mr. Green eased down, leaning with his elbows on his knees.

"So, Theron, how do you like Hogwart?" Mr. Green asked. Theron looked confused.

"It's good," he replied hesitantly.

"What's your favorite subject?" Mr. Green inquired.

"Quidditch, probably," Theron answered. A few people chuckled.

"I wasn't aware they taught that," Mr. Green responded. Theron grinned at him.

"No, but the rest of the subjects are kind of boring," Theron admitted. "I guess of my official lessons, flying would be my favorite."

"Before you went to Hogwarts, had you flown a broom before?" Mr. Green asked him. Theron shook his head. "Please note that the witness is indicating that he'd not flown a broom before. Why is that, Theron?"

"My mum said that it wasn't allowed, that I could get in trouble," Theron confessed. He rolled his eyes. "Mum's a stickler for rules."

"Now, you got into a little trouble before schools started, didn't you? Underage magic outside of school, you and your two cousin, wasn't it?" Mr. Green inquired.

"Yes," Theron nodded.

"What was your punishment?" Mr. Green asked.

"From the ministry or from my mum?" Theron asked. A few people chuckled. Mr. Green smiled at him warmly.

"Let's stick with the ministry's punishment, since they've made it their duty to dole out punishments," Mr. Green offered.

"Well, I was on a year's probation. I didn't even dare to do spells in the corridors! Just the classrooms and the common room/dormitories, like approved," Theron explained.

"Were you afraid of getting in trouble with the ministry if you stepped out of line?" Mr. Green asked. Theron shook his head.

"No, but I didn't want my mum sending me any howlers. She told me about how she got one on her first day for bouncing tubers off the head of a Gryffindor, and well, I didn't want a howler. Mum was lucky, though," Theron added hesitantly.

"Why is that, Theron?" Mr. Green asked curiously.

"Mum would have been really embarrassed if Dad hadn't pulled her out of line of sight of everyone in the Great Hall when that thing went off," Theron explained quietly. He looked to his hands for a second and then looked up. "The ministry took my Dad away from me for so long, and I'm afraid they're going to take my Mum."

"Objection!" The minister shouted, startling quite a few people.

"I haven't been able to hug my Mum in over a year," Theron exclaimed. His eyes were shining bright with unshed tears, and Mr. Green patted him on the shoulder.

"I'm done," Mr. Green offered the Gamut.

"Sirs and ma'am, may I?" Theron asked them, looking up at the older witches and wizards. They looked to the Chief Warlock, who nodded once. Theron hopped off the chair and ran to her. Lily remained seated, her arms spread as the boy buried his face in her neck, sobbing loudly. Lily whispered to him, private words only meant for his ears, while she stroked his hair and held him.

"Maybe a break?" the Chief Warlock suggested, rising. Several people also joined him, but others remained behind to watch the endearing reunion between mother and son. She continued to talk to him quietly, holding him.

"Do you remember me, Mummy?" he sobbed quietly.

"Oh, yes, Ther, I remember you," she assured him. "It took some time, and there are still hazy parts, but I remember you. You're what's helped the last five months in Azkaban."

"Mum, I don't ever want to leave you," Theron cried softly. She shushed him, cradling his face in her hands.

"Don't be silly, Ther. After Christmas, you'll go back to Hogwarts," she told him. "Education is very important. We'll have Easter, if you wish, and the summer."

"Promise?" Theron begged. Lily nodded. He smiled, better than the Malfoy smirk, he smiled the Potter's smile. It lit his face up with all the joy and comfort she could have ever hoped for her son. She kissed his forehead and allowed him to retreat as the Wizengamot was called to order again.

Lily only half paid attention while Draco was interrogated. He looked less than pleased to be on the stand and he refused to look Lily's way. Lily was more focused on the dancing baby in her stomach, and making a conscious effort not to touch her stomach. She did looked up while her brother testified to what he saw, though every time he tried to play it down, the prosecuting wizards would redirect. He looked relieved when Mr. Green kept his questions quick and simple.

"Did it look from your perspective that Lily was trying to injure or assault Scorpius Malfoy?" Mr. Green asked.

"No," Albus replied. "In fact, I think he was causing her more harm than good."

"What do you mean by that?" Mr. Green asked.

"Didn't she tell you? Or maybe she doesn't know, I don't know. Scorpius and Damon did an unauthorized Obliviate spell on her, a couple of them if I recall correctly, which is why she's had a really hard time remembering Scorpius, and why she didn't recall her son, or a lot of people," Albus explained matter of factly.

"In your opinion, do you think the ministry reacted appropriately when dealing with Miss Potter?" Mr. Green asked carefully.

"Mr. Green, my sister, the last connection I have to my father and mother, was first robbed of her memories, and then of her friends in family," Albus explained. "No, I don't think they handled her appropriately."

Lily watched Scorpius take the stand. Mr. Green didn't have a lot of questions for him, just basic ones confirming what happened in Argentina, and what transpired leading up to Lily's arrest. Mr. Green didn't ask Scorpius if he felt assaulted. He just asked what happened. Scorpius left the stand confused, but he had been enthralled that she seemed to hang on his every word.

Damon was called up after Scorpius, and ran through the events on the elevator, confirming what part he had played in Lily's memory tampering from Argentina. Damon watched Mr. Green whisper something to Lily, she answered him without taking her eyes off of him. She scrunched her face up, tapping her lip like she did when she was deep in thought. Mr. Green stood.

"Mr. West, you mention that you've known Lily for a long time, is that true?" Mr. Green asked him. Damon looked away from Mr. Green, his eyes falling on Lily as she leaned forward, propping her chin on her hand.

"Yes," Damon admitted. "She's my best mate's girl, has been for eons, it seems."

"Is it true that the ministry, more specifically the Minister of Magic and the Department of Auror Affairs has a no-frat policy, where one Auror may not engage in romantic activities with the significant other of an Auror?" Mr. Green asked.

"Yes, well, but-"

"The night Lily was taken into custody, is it true that you and Lily were together?"Mr. Green asked.

"She didn't have any solid memories of either of us," Damon squirmed.

"Please answer the question, Mr. West," Mr. Green asked firmly. "Is it or isn't it true that an hour or two prior to the ministry apprehending Lily Potter, you and she were together?"

"Yes," Damon admitted.

"What were you two doing?" Mr. Green asked.

"Talking," Damon shot back.

"Just talking?" Mr. Green asked. Damon's cheeks turned slightly red.

"No, I kissed her," Damon confessed. Mr. Green paced a minute or two.

"Without going into too many details, since we do have juveniles in the court room," Mr. Green projected. "Other than kissing Lily Potter, an act that would possibly be considered fraternizing with the noted significant other of another Auror, did you and Miss Potter do anything else? Anything at all?"

"I don't see what the point of this line of questioning is," the minister piped up crossly.

"Your Warlockness, I just want to point out yet another bit in a long line of corruption in the ministry under Minister Parker," Mr. Green explained. "If he can't keep his Aurors from messing around behind each other's backs, how can we expect them to protect us from dark witches and wizards, or to be our ambassadors in other countries."

"I'll allow it," the Chief Warlock gestured toward Damon. "Continue."

"Mr. West, other than kissing Miss Potter, other than talking, was their anything else you two did on the night she was arrested?" Mr. Green asked. Damon looked at her, she looked at him. They both knew exactly what had happened. She felt her cheeks grow increasingly warm.

"Yeah, we were intimate," Damon confessed. "Physically intimate."

"I hate you," Scorpius growled loudly at Damon.

"Feeling's mutual, bro," Damon growled back. "But at least she remembers me." Whispered tittered through the court room and the Chief Warlock banged his gavel loudly, calling a recess when he realized that no one was going to be able to calm down. Damon and Scorpius both stalked from the room, Scorpius returning a minute later to retrieve his son who'd stayed behind.

After lunch, court resumed. Damon had a bruise forming under his eye and Scorpius' lip was cut, but no one made mention to it. Lily suspected that the two of them had scrapped like a bunch of school boys. The minister of Argentina was drug up to the stand. Lily didn't listen to him, his take on things. She was blissfully unaware of what he'd done believing she had been an operative illegally in his country. She refused to look up as they presented the pictures, but from the gasps, she knew that they must have been bad.

The minister was second to last up, he rambled on for a few minutes and Lily could feel the pull of sleep pulling her under. He pointed out the fact that Lily had pushed an Auror and held him captive on the elevator for four floors, and stole from him equipment. He also bore witness to Lily grabbing Scorpius' face and forcing him to turn his head to look at a picture.

Mr. Green sat in his chair for a minute after the floor was handed over to him. He tapped his two pointer fingers slowly, deep in thought. Mr. Green stood up.

"Mr. Minister, you had Lily arrested for assault," Mr. Green verified.

"Yes, among other charges that we so kindly dropped," the minister pointed out.

"Like treason, yet she was actually in Argentina because of information provided inadvertently by your own operatives, is that correct?"

"She chose to go to Argentina herself, I even refused to sign off on her portkey," the minister boasted.

"Whose decision was it to hold Lily Potter in Azkaban until the trial?" Mr. Green asked. The minister's smile faltered slightly.

"Mine, I felt that with her history, she was a serious flight risk," the minister attested. Mr. Green held out a thick stack of parchment.

"Do you know what these are, Mr. Minister? These are requests to visit with my client," Mr. Green explained holding them up. "Everyone of them has been signed off on by you denying that right."

"Azkaban prison isn't a place we grant just any old visitor to go to," the minister protested.

"Whose responsibility is to make sure that the prisoners are treated humanely?" Mr. Green inquired.

"Mine," the minister admitted.

"We you aware that the dementors are back patrolling the prison?" Mr. Green pressed.

"We have protocols in place so that the prisoners are safe from them," Minister Parker offered.

"I see," Mr. Green stroked his chin. He flicked his wand at a stack of large prints, blown up to poster sized. "Perhaps you could explain to me what this is, then?"

"Some prisoner," Minister Parker replied as the pictures rotated to first show the minister, then the Wizengamot, and finally the witnesses and previewers.

"Some prisoner?" Mr. Green smirked. He shook his head slightly, almost as if in disbelief. "Would you believe that these were taken just two weeks ago when I was finally granted permission to retrieve my client?"

"Okay," the minister replied slowly.

"During the five months that my client, Lily Potter, was in Azkaban, she was fed about a cup of some undistinguishable gray gloop a day, and never once in the five months was my client permitted access to healthcare," Mr. Green said forcibly as he snatched one of the posters up and stared at it for a moment. "Your honors, my client hadn't even been sentenced, nor was she ever given a written copy of her charges. She was locked away to fend for herself, without even the most basic of prenatal care which had been detrimental to the health of both her and her unborn child. I demand that the charges be dropped immediately and that the Wizengamot launch an immediate investigation in to Minister Parker and his practices."

Mr. Green flipped the card, the one where Lily was being half-drug out of the prison and into the light, dirty and skinny, with just a bulge of baby showing, while sunlight glistened in the tears trapped in her eyelashes. He showed them all, slowly, the ripple of noise peaking before he added the card back to the stack.

"The Gaunts, both well know for the violence toward the ministry and Aurors, were allowed to walk free until their sentencing, where for the repeated assaults they each got six months, with extra time for additional crimes," Mr. Green said.

They took a ten minute break, Mr. Green talking with his client through the whole time. He squeezed her hand along with Susan, both of them smiled at her and she slowly rose when she was called to the stand. She moved slowly, purposefully. Her hand smoothed the front of her dress as she took her seat, the growing child evident. The room was pin-drop silent.

"Miss Potter," Mr. Green started gently. "Tell me what happened the night you were aprehended by the minister." Lily took a shaky breath.

"I ran away from the ministry guards that had been assigned to me," Lily started. "I ran for the elevator and pushed Damon inside, hoping he would explain to me why I knew he had to have known me but chose to say nothing."

"And what did he tell you?"

"Damon told me that the ministry forbade it because we had been intimate, I'm assuming a sexual relationship, prior to my coming back from Argentina broken," Lily sighed softly. "It was kind of a relief to know that it wasn't something I had done."

"So, you took his flask?"

"Yes, and I still feel very guilty about it because I know the DAA wouldn't issue it if it wasn't ultimately needed," Lily explained. "I wandered around a while, apparating which isn't easy wandless."

"That's actually rather impressive," Mr. Green admitted. There was a murmur through the crowd.

"I don't know why I went to him, but I did," Lily shrugged slightly. "I think part of me wanted whatever answers he'd give me, part of me just craved being held."

"So, what did you do next, Lily?" Mr. Green pressed.

"I dressed up like a hooker, took the poly juice, and snuck into his bedroom," Lily admitted. "We talked for a while, I tried to seduce him and at first he turned me down. Eventually, the lights went out and the poly juice wore off. He knew it was me all along, apparently even when I'm trying to be bad, I'm too good."

"Were you physically intimate with him?" Mr. Green paused, glancing over at Damon and Scorpius, who had Theron tucked between them.

"Yes," Lily sighed with a frown. She slid her hand over her stomach protectively. "If I had known that this could have happened, I wouldn't have continued our physical relationship without telling him first, warning him. When I lost Scorpius and my baby on what was supposed to be our wedding day, they had told me that I was too damaged. It's why my relationship with Marshall Clocks wouldn't have worked, and why I thought it was safe to fall for Damon."

"Is Damon the father of your child?" Mr. Green asked. Lily looked at her counsel with almost hurt and betrayal on her face. She hadn't told him, or Susan, but somehow they'd guessed.

"Does it matter?" Lily asked with a small shrug. "According to Obadiah Parker, I assaulted them both."

"Tell me what happened with Scorpius," Mr. Green asked, changing his tactics.

"I had showered and was about to change when Scorpius walked in my room. He and I talked, he got upset about my continuing a physical relationship with Damon, even though I made a point of pointing out that Damon did initially turn me down, and quite often," Lily explained. She sighed. "It's a real blow to a gal's ego. I shared with him my grief of not knowing him, of feeling cheated because for as much as I cared for and loved Damon, Scorpius was the true love of my life."

"Where did the assault come in, Lily?" Mr. Green pressed.

"I took Scorpius by the hand and guided him to my living room. I had this portrait of the three of us, Scorpius, Theron, and I on the wall, from when Theron was a bitty baby. I turned his face to look and see what I saw, a man and woman, a family, that absolutely adored each other. I wanted him to see that even though I didn't have my memories intact, I knew that he was and remained the love of my life."

"Do you have your memories back of Damon?" Mr. Green asked.

"Yes," Lily replied.

"And what about Scorpius?" he pressed. Lily hesitated.

"Some, many of them, but not all," Lily confessed. She smiled slightly, not looking at anyone but Mr. Green. "I know that Scorpius is the love of my life. I chased him for years, waiting for him to notice me. Thoughts of him, and my son Theron are the only things that comforted me for those five months I was locked away from the world."

"What would happen if you were sentenced to the full six months per charge?" Mr. Green asked. A single tear slipped down her cheek.

"I can't go back to that place," Lily breathed. "I can't have my baby there." She turned away from Mr. Green, away from the viewers and the witnesses, and she looked right at the Chief Warlock. "Sir, I respect whatever decision you make, I do, but I don't believe I acted in malice. I didn't set out to injure or harm, either Scorpius or Damon. I couldn't, not on purpose, I love them both, differently but I love them. I understand if you have to send me away, but please, not to Azkaban. Not somewhere my boy will lose me to the grief, not somewhere my baby can't hope to have a happy start."

Lily stepped off the stand with the help of Mr. Green and court was called to deliberations. Susan and Mr. Green shuffled her off before anyone could accost her. Lily didn't say anything, just walked straight into the bedroom and laid down on the bed. She was drained, physically and emotionally. She almost immediately fell asleep.


End file.
